angel Page 138 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kobe Bryant Airballs From Siberia As The Lakers Lose by 34
The other day my colleague Albert Burneko worried that Nick Young's return had improbably elevated the Lakers from "gonzo terribleness to bland mediocrity." Worried because the Lakers' spectacular brand of suck has been the most entertaining subplot early in this surprisingly dismal NBA season, and ...
Craig Sager Briefly Returns To TV For Coaches vs. Cancer Classic
The last time Craig Sager and his suits that Kevin Garnett think should be burned was on our televisions was April, prior to his treatment for leukemia. He left the hospital in May, and last night he made a return to TV for college basketball's Coaches vs. Cancer Classic, speaking a short message ab...
Kings' Slava Voynov Charged With Felony In Domestic Violence Case
Kings defenseman Slava Voynov has been charged with one felony count of "corporal injury to spouse with great bodily injury," stemming from an argument with his wife in Oct. 19. ...
Why The Lakers' Brand Of Suck Matters
That Nick Young's return to the lineup would coincide with the Lakers' ascent from gonzo terribleness to bland mediocrity fits, really. Both because at every stop in his NBA career Nick Young has done whatever would annoy me the most, but also because "Swaggy P" is the basketball embodiment of a tw...
Nick Young And Jordan Hill Briefly Make Being A Laker Seem Fun
Outside of the Philadelphia 76ers, there is no more depressing (although we find them more darkly hilarious) team in the NBA than the Los Angeles Lakers. That might be changing with the return of Nick Young, though, who has helped the Lakers to two straight wins after missing the team's 1-9 start du...
The Funniest Thing In Sports: Kobe Bryant Chucking At Historic Levels
Kobe Bryant shot a combined 16-for-48 in the two ass-kickings the Lakers absorbed over the weekend. Even the bad guys from Rambo III are all, "Jesus, man, that's a lotta terrible shooting." The friggin' Ethyl Higby Charm School doesn't have that many misses....
Warning: Doug McDermott Will Just Get All Up In Your Picture
Former Creighton star Doug McDermott hasn't exactly taken the NBA by storm in his first weeks as a pro, but that doesn't mean that he's short on confidence. For example, McDermott has no problem rolling right into a famous-person photo that he definitely wasn't invited to....
Sad Jeremy Lin Sums Up The Lakers' Season In Six Seconds
I have no idea what question this is in response to, but it could have been anything from "How can you guys improve on the defensive end?" to "At this point, why even continue living?" and this would be the perfect answer....
Lakers And Fans Sleep Through Home Blowout To The Warriors
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Clayton Kershaw Picks Up MVP Too, Mike Trout Finally Snags One
Clayton Kershaw followed-up his NL Cy Young win by taking home the NL MVP trophy too, becoming the first person to sweep those awards since Bob Gibson did so while playing for the Cardinals in 1968. The Marlins outfielder Giancarlo Stanton—whose candidacy might have been sunk when he took a fastball...
Kobe And The Lakers Do Dumb Shit; Anthony Davis Dismisses Them
The ridiculous, bad-basketball-playin'-ass Lakers lost again last night, 109-102 in New Orleans, to fall to 1-7. Basically, they performed how you might expect them to on the second night of a road back-to-back: they won the first quarter with some fluky hot shooting, then sagged badly in the middl...
Report: Blake Griffin Charged With Misdemeanor Battery
According to TMZ, the Clark County District Attorney has charged Clippers star Blake Griffin with misdemeanor battery for his role in an alleged assault in a Las Vegas night club last month. Griffin is alleged to have gotten mad at cameras flashing in his face while in Tao Nightclub, so he grabbed t...
All Hail Kobe Bryant And The Lakers, Lords Of Madness
First things first: You don't get to miss more shots than anybody else in NBA history by being bad at basketball. That record would be Larry Hughes's if he didn't, y'know, suck at everything, and in this sense, the all-time missed-shots record is a perverse monument to Kobe Bryant's greatness. He ...
Kobe Bryant Breaks All-Time NBA Record For Missed Shots
Kobe Bryant is officially the all-time greatest player in NBA history at failing to make a basket. Soak in this historic moment! 13,418 is a large number....
Lakers Guard Wayne Ellington Leaves Team After Father Shot And Killed
Lakers shooting guard Wayne Ellington Jr. has taken an indefinite leave of absence from the team after his father was shot and killed in Philadelphia on Sunday night, according to a statement from the team. NBC's Philadelphia affiliate reports that police responding to a car crash in Philadelphia's ...
Don't Dribble Near Kawhi Leonard
Spurs forward Kawhi Leonard had himself a game last night, pacing his sluggish team to a win over the Clippers with 26 points, 10 rebounds, and three steals. Using his crazy-long arms and massive hands to snatch balls away from hapless dribblers has been Leonard's signature move since entering the l...
The Crazy Kobe Trade Ideas Season Is Now Open
One of the many joys of a high-profile NBA team collapsing is when the desperate homers and old-fart national columnists who, weirdly, don't pay any actual attention to the NBA begin wildly overestimating what the team could get back by trading away its bad players. Hey, the Knicks are in the toile...
The Lakers Won, Can't Win
The hilarious Lakers finally got a win last night, a 107-92 clobbering of the Hornets in Los Angeles. Turns out, all it took to get the Lakers off the hook was nearly an entire week off to prepare to host one of the most dysfunctional offensive teams in basketball. Should be a pretty repeatable fo...
Angelo Badalamenti Seems Like A Nice Guy
I guess I had always assumed Angelo Badalamenti was some awfully hip, overeducated Italian in an expensive turtleneck, some godson of Antonioni, who applied a sort of smug, cynical viewing of American soap operas when composing the theme music for "Twin Peaks." But nah! He's a cool old dude from B...
Holy Shit, The Lakers Actually Won A Game
Here you see ecstatic weirdos clad in sleeveless shirts with names like "Abdul-Jabbar," "Johnson," and "S. Parker" on the back applauding their team for truly achieving the unthinkable: yes, the Lakers won a basketball game. For those disbelieving, here is the proof....