angel Page 214 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Los Angeles Plays Itself
We come to you live from Los Angeles, California, a city in which we once lived and still kind of miss a little. And that's not just because there is no NFL team here. Though that doesn't hurt....
Lakers Fans Are A Figment Of Our Imagination
I don't know if I've ever met a single person who rooted solely for Los Angeles Lakers. In my entire life, not one die-hard Lakers fan. That's astounding. This leads me to believe that Lakers fandom is reserved exclusively for celebrities and basketball analysts. If the layman Lakers supporter does ...
The Clashing Of The Titanic Titans
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and who has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not screaming in soulless rage at the merciless Pagan gods, he can be found making fart jokes at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
Lakers Come Up A Little Short
Ha, nice shorts! It was 1980s retrospective night at the Staples Center on Sunday, the Lakers stylin' with short shorts, assistant coach Kurt Rambis sporting a fake mustache, and the Laker Girls wearing spandex. No word as to whether Nicholson dropped 25 pounds and came dressed as The Joker. (A tre...
Today's Episode: Isiah Has An Epiphany
Skeets is off celebrating Christmas Eve the way that all Canadians do; pantsless and migrating with a herd of elk. So your NBA Closer today is being written by United States Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Alphonso Jackson. Do enjoy....
Battle Of The Stars
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or spelunking, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy!...
Ring In The New Year With Kwame Brown
We can't think of any athlete more worthy of a special VIP table than Kwame Brown; it seems the perfect pre-Rose Bowl palate cleanser. But we hope no one brings a cake....
All For Naught
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Huzzah!...
What Group of People Will Phil Jackson Offend Next?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Phil Jackson Just Can't Quit You
Sure, Phil Jackson's post-game comments on Tuesday were controversial. But the cinematography was spectacular, and we say he deserves an Oscar. Wait, what? After losing to the Spurs on Tuesday, Jackson said "We call this a 'Brokeback Mountain' game because there's so much penetration and kickouts." ...
Joe Torre, All Hollywood Now
Joe Torre took his triumphant first bow as manager of the Dodgers yesterday, but as anyone who sees this picture can tell you, he was mostly just there to channel Enrico Palazzo....
Joe Torre: Not Likely To Overdose At The Viper Room, But Will Be Near It
As expected, the Los Angeles Dodgers not of Anaheim will officially introduce Joe Torre as their new manager during a Monday morning press conference. The storied organization rids itself of the managerial albatross that was Grady Little, and lands a future Hall of Fame manager with four World Serie...
Torre's Torture Of Grady Continues
It's starting to inch ever so closer to official that Joe Torre will be the new manager of the Los Angeles Dodgers, particularly after Grady Little resigned from the job yesterday, claiming those famous "personal reasons." Thus continues Torre's perpetual torment of poor Grady....
Please Give A Warm Forum Welcome To Day One Of The NBA Season
Welcome the return of your daily recap of NBA "action."...
You Know, Torre Really Could Use A Tan
Our old friend Peter Abraham, who is a big fan of sushi and Fashion Week gossip, has the big scoop this morning: The Dodgers are going to fire Grady Little and hire Joe Torre....
The Journalists Is Smart And Diligent
How absurd has the the Kobe Bryant story become? There was a rather large media kerfuffle at Lakers practice yesterday revolving around whether or not Kobe had cleaned out his locker. It turned out that he hadn't cleaned out his locker; he had merely cleaned it. Say what you will about the status of...
Please, No More Kobe Bryant
We're gonna just man up and beg the Lakers here: Please, please, trade Kobe Bryant. We don't care where. Chicago? Phoenix? Dallas? We don't know, and we don't care. Just get it done, and fast....