ant Page 520 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fuck Kevin Durant
Tomorrow night, the world will be subjected to The Offseason: Kevin Durant, an HBO show marketed as a documentary that depicts what The Servant has been up to since the end of the Western Conference Finals. You might think it would be interesting, seeing that over the summer Durant (briefly) played ...
Anthony Davis Is A Goddamn Demon
Anthony Davis is going to own the league sooner rather than later, because Anthony Davis is a shot-devouring, rebound-snatching, dunking monster who is now armed with a solid mid-range jumper and respectable handles. Dunks and smooth jumpers and blocks are great, but if you really want to see what m...
The Lakers Are Still Jump-Kicking Themselves In The Face
A funny thing happened on Halloween: Perhaps inspired by the children of America— who'd spent the evening taking to the streets in elaborate costumes, pretending to be ghosts and ghouls and ninja turtles rather than little kids—the Lakers decided to dress up as a team that can wring success out of t...
We Have An Actual Kobe Bryant Highlight To Show You
Kobe went as M.J. for Halloween....
Even Hockey Highlights Are Better When Called By Spanish Announcers
It's no secret that when given the opportunity, we watch games called by Spanish-language announcers. (Yours truly being located in Florida, those options are plentiful.) So here's the Florida Panthers' winning goal by Scottie Upshall Thursday night, as called by Arley Londoño of ESPN Radio as par...
Little Kid At Giants Parade Yells "Fuck Her Right In The Pussy" On Air
The practice of yelling "fuck her right in the pussy" at inappropriate moments should no longer be a thing, but this instance is notable because of how young the perpetrator is. The kid jumps in there with the quickness, does his damage, and dashes off, leaving the poor reporter to try and salvage...
Candy Corn Is Garbage
Many people like candy corn, such as hobos, serial murderers, and Satan. But actually, candy corn is terrible. If you give it out to trick-or-treating children this evening, you belong in fucking prison....
Watch E-40 Watch The Giants Win The World Series
Rapper and Yay Area ambassador E-40 is a big San Francisco Giants fan, and he had some nice seats behind home plate for the World Series. Last night, he posted a video of Pablo Sandoval's series-ending out from his perspective....
Kobe To Dwight Howard: "Soft Motherfucker, Bitch-Ass Nigga"
It was plainly clear that Kobe Bryant called Dwight Howard "soft" while shit-talking his former teammate on opening night, but now, thanks to an intrepid Instagram user who was sitting courtside at the game, we know that Kobe also called Dwight a "bitch-ass nigga."...
The Giants' Defense Deserves Some Love, Too
Madison Bumgarner rolled into Game 7 of the World Series like Gozer The Destructor and gave us one of the greatest postseason performances in history, and so you wouldn't be blamed for overlooking the contributions of the rest of the Giants on the field. With that in mind, let's take a moment to t...
Madison Bumgarner's Dad Is The Best Sports Dad
One bizarre side effect of turning in one of the best postseason pitching runs in MLB history is that the New York Times will send a reporter out to North Carolina to interview your dad saying just the dad-est possible things. So meet Kevin Bumgarner, proud father of the reigning World Series MVP,...
Photos: The Giants Booze It Up
Let this be your refreshing liquid antidote to the gallery of San Franciscans burning couches: the Giants, who actually did the hard work, letting loose on the field and in the locker room. There is no champagne like championship champagne....
Salvador Perez Never Stood A Chance Against Madison Bumgarner
Madison Bumgarner ended the World Series by throwing six straight high fastballs to Salvador Perez, the majority of which were up around Perez's eyeballs. It was the perfect matchup for the series to end on: a guy who works his fastball high in the zone better than any pitcher in the league coming...
San Francisco Brings Fire And Fistfights To World Series Celebrations
As in 2010 and 2012, Giants fans took to the streets to celebrate their World Series win, and as in 2010 and 2012, some of them burned shit and warred with cops in riot gear....
Come, Let Us Have Another Laugh At The Disastrous Lakers
So the Lakers rolled out their "actually, bad basketball is cool and good" strategy again last night in Phoenix; accordingly, they got their wheels knocked off, losing 119-99 in a game that somehow makes even that score seem deceptively close....
Madison Bumgarner Is Tired Now
The greatest moments in baseball tend to possess an element of surprise, deciding a game or flipping a narrative on a single play and in a matter of seconds. The adrenaline spike from a home run or a stellar defensive play is memorable for being unexpected, but the drawback is that you can't, in the...
You Will Never See A Pitching Performance Like That Again
What Madison Bumgarner just did is supposed to be impossible. Every single pitch, every single whip of the arm exerts an extreme amount of pressure on the wrist, elbow, shoulder, and every single joint and muscle in-between. After games you see starting pitchers with giant bags of ice wrapped around...
Giants Win World Series With Five-Inning Bumgarner Relief Performance
The San Francisco Giants won their third World Series in five years thanks to Madison Bumgarner's brilliant five-inning relief performance—one that required him to strand a man on third thanks to some lousy outfield defense in the bottom of the ninth. Here's how the final out sounded; above is Pab...
Jimbo Fisher Is A Whimpering Penis
Florida State is ranked second overall in the College Football Playoff committee's current rankings, which are determined by a complex mix of computer algorithms and schedule analysis and praying to a magic goldfish for spiritual guidance. And if you're like me, you're hoping that Florida State los...