ant Page 650 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Visanthe Shiancoe Wants To Show The World He's More Than Just A Wagging Dong
Yahoo!'s Michael Silver does a double entendre-filled profile on Vikings' tight end Visanthe Shiancoe, who's working hard to overcome his internet long-comings....

Ex-Giant Brad Benson Is Greatest Ad Wizard Since Don Draper
Like many former athletes, New York Giant alumnus Brad Benson found a second career as a successful car dealer. Unlike most of them, however, he's made another name for himself as a filthy-minded, possibly unhinged radio pitchman....

Bengie Molina's Outrage At ESPN Is Slowly Rounding Third
Molina has declared himself unamused by the SportsCenter clip you see here, in which the Giants catcher is lightly mocked for running from second to home like the QE2 steaming into port. This from a guy whose Wikipedia entry calls him slow....

Drew Rosenhaus Breaking Flaming Bricks Is A Metaphor For His Negotiating Skills ... Or Something
Turns out Drew Rosenhaus, noted driveway-press-conference hobbyist, also enjoys training in the martial arts when he isn't forcing your favorite team to give an extra year and $3 million dollar roster bonus to Olindo Mare. [Tauntr]...

Because Shaking Hands With Brian Scalabrine Is A Total Jinx
Scalabrine, the red-headed bench warmer, never gets to join in any reindeer games. Maybe it was the Clark Griswold lounge-cruising footwear that caused Tony Allen and Big Baby Davis to just blatantly ignore him. (H/T MK Migraine) [YouTube]...

Kobe's A Pilgrim, Kobe's A Stranger
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Stylist For Kobe's Awful Photo Shoot Says He Didn't Want Anything "Too Gay Or Twinkie-boy"
Italian "freelance stylist" Jame Veleri to the LA Times: "I went for high fashion, not something too easy or too predictable. I thought it was cool and not too mainstream, but not too gay or Twinkie-boy." Mission accomplished?...

Tell Me How My Class Tastes: Scenes From The Worst NFL Draft Party Ever
This is, on the surface, the tale of the lamest NFL Draft party of all time. But it's also a story about class and about fans who project their own anxieties on their favorite teams and about teams that respond in kind....

Indians Announcer Goes On Epic Indians Rant On The Indians' Network
Bruce Drennan has had it up to here with the Indians' poor play this season. Yesterday, he decided to go through his scoresheet and give each player an equal-opportunity ripping, looking like a Don Rickles-Gilbert Gottfried hybrid in the process. [WFNY]...

Dear Philadelphia Fans: Tase Yo'selves Before You Wreck Yo'selves
It seemed a bit excessive to zap the towel-waving teenage scamp at CBP, but the black hearts of Phillies fans really could use some seizure-causing high voltage right now....

Soccer Player Gets Carded For Fatal Heart Attack (UPDATE)
Welp, diving in soccer now has its "boy who cried wolf" moment. The ref showed a collapsed Croatian player a yellow card because he thought he was faking. He wasn't. He was dead....

Gallery: A Roundup Of Kobe Bryant Photoshop Humor (UPDATES)
Many, many, many of you submitted your artwork to the Kobe Bryant photoshop post's comments and in emails. Keep 'em coming, and I'll update here accordingly....

A Black Mamba Photoshop-Off? A Black Mamba Photoshop-Off
Yesterday, we drew your attention to a photo spread of Kobe Bryant that appeared in LA Times Magazine. It's a ridiculous set of pictures, and it was only a matter of time before the Photoshop shenanigans began. Do your own handiwork below....

Last Night's Winner: The Dogged Efforts To Prove Dez Bryant's Mom Is A Sinner
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Karacter Kops determined to prove that the mother of a newly minted professional football player is, while not a hooker, still a very bad person....

Real Deer Burst Into Wisconsin Bar During Bucks Game, Prove Unworthy Of Anyone's Fear
Shortly after the start of the Bucks' eventual Game 7 loss to the Atlanta Hawks, two genuine Wisconsin deer burst through the glass doors of the Stout Ale House restaurant in Menomonie, where patrons were watching the game. Video inside....

Dez Bryant's Non-Streetwalking Mother Upset That Jeff Ireland Has Not Apologized To Her
"No, he has not called. I think he should have. Why wouldn't you do that?," she complained to Fanhouse. Maybe Ireland still thinks he would risk a solicitation charge if he called her directly....

Kobe Bryant: Whitest Man On The Planet
Poor Black Mamba lets the LA Times Magazine dress him in an inexplicable pimp-doily-meets-Jor-El wardrobe meant to showcase the fun side of his personality. Plus, the interview portion has him discussing dog shit again. [LATmag]...

Byzantine Facebook Recruiting Rules Trip Up UVa
Virginia Coach Mike London is in trouble not because he sent recruit Curtis Grant a Facebook message, but because he didn't do it secretly. Oh, and the actual message is pretty weird, in a NAMBLA kind of way....

The (Potentially Scandalous, Potentially Frivolous) Saints Vicodin Lawsuit
So Sean Payton and another coach are accused of raiding and abusing the team's medicine cabinet. And the security director making the allegations is accused of blackmailing the team. Tricky stuff. This calls for a breakdown....

If Anyone Else Is Morbidly Curious About "The Human Centipede"...
Mark Lisanti is live blogging his viewing of it right now. It's just about to get fun it looks like. [MovieLine]...