ant Page 649 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
!["It's Just All Made Up And Flagellant": A Tour Of Fred Davis's Hilarious Legal Troubles [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17rafso5oxas7jpg.jpg)
"It's Just All Made Up And Flagellant": A Tour Of Fred Davis's Hilarious Legal Troubles [UPDATE]
Well, now. Yesterday, The Washingtonian passed along the glorious details of the shitshow civil suit being brought against Redskins tight end Fred Davis by a woman who's accused of being a "pimpette." Long story short: Davis allegedly poured an entire pitcher of juice on the woman's head, and the wo...
"A Neat Kid": Your Passive-Aggressive 2012 NBA Draft Scouting Roundup
The NBA draft is getting underway now, which means that it is time for our annual roundup of faint praise, backhanded compliments, and snickering passive-aggression directed at the gifted players about to become honest professionals. Players are listed in the order of Chad Ford's latest mock draft....
Benito Santiago's Niece Strikes Out 19 Boys In Six-Inning Little League Championship Game
Another parent calls her the "Michael Jordan" of Syracuse N.Y.'s Southside American Little League. She can fire a fastball more than 60 miles per hour, and she mixes in a cutter, slider, and change-up. She also plays shortstop, and her own batting average is higher than .600. For games, she wears he...
This Video Of An Old Crimson Tide Fan Lip-Synching "Call Me Maybe" Is The Most Discomforting Thing Ever
From tipster William, with whom we will be forever angry with due to what he has exposed us to, comes the above video. The video depicts an elderly gentleman lip-synching to "Call Me Maybe," which is A Thing on YouTube these days, but this version goes beyond "Oh man this song is so stupid and ann...
Because This Stuff Never Gets Old, Here's Carmelo Anthony Scaring People By Pretending To Be A Wax Figure
Melo got his sculpture at Madame Tussauds in Times Square yesterday, and in between saying things like "my time is coming," he did that thing where he stands stock-still until unsuspecting ticket-buyers get close enough to spook. There were no reactions as magical as this one, but Anthony's timing...
There's Some Tim Lincecum Voodoo Going On At The Marlins' Bobblehead Museum
We've already highlighted the horrors of Marlins Park's Bobblehead Museum, featuring a moving glass case that keeps the heads bobbling...ever bobbling. But there, in some severed ceramic, may lie the answer to Tim Lincecum's struggles....
San Francisco Police Dressing Up As Dodger Fans Is Totally Not Entrapment Somehow
The Dodgers and Giants meet up again at AT&T Park starting tonight, which means there will be fights between Dodger and Giant fans in the stands, in the parking lot, in the gift shops probably. It just happens, it's been this way for years, and this blood feud will surely outlive us all. However, ci...
Golf Pants For All, Even Those Who Are Terrible At Golf
'Tis the season of endless summer days spent perfecting your chip shot in pursuit of that elusive double eagle. So what are you going to wear? Let Bonobos, the geniuses who bring you the perfect-fitting pants, help you at least look like you know what you're doing on the links this summer....
What Did Internet Trolls Do Before The Internet? They Sent Letters To Wellington Mara That Wound Up In His FBI File
So you think you're a successful troll? Think again, tough guy....
Indians Catcher Carlos Santana Fouls Pitch Off Foot, Recovers, Promptly Does It Again
He was wearing a shin protector on his right leg, but it didn't matter. He was wearing a shin protector on his right leg, but it didn't matter. Ouch. Ouch....
Throbbing Pipes And Pussy By The Can: Scenes From Laconia Bike Week
It is never truly silent during Laconia Bike Week. Even when you're far from the Finger Eleven or Nickelback songs playing at Weirs Beach (the heart of the event), or from the profanity dropping out of the mouths of bearded dudes with skin almost as leathery as the vests they're wearing, there is st...
Tony Parker Says His Eye Was 99 Percent Punctured By Flying Glass In The Drake/Chris Brown Nightclub Melee
Some snarky bloggers cracked jokes a few weeks ago about what happened to Tony Parker's cornea in the bottle-throwing smackdown between Chris Brown, Drake, and their entourages. Parker showed up to a press conference in sunglasses, said he was fine and that his eye would heal in a week....
A Sad English Penis Could Not Stop Italy From Advancing
Pirlo's Panenka-esque chip turned the tide. The Ashleys' gaffes set the table. But it was Alessandro Diamanti, going left and going low, that sent Italy through to the semis over the broken hearts of the overachieving Three Lions....
Sandusky Attorneys Wanted Off The Case On The Eve Of Trial
In the media whirlwind following the verdict, lawyerin' Joe Amendola said many things. Some were characteristically head-scratching, while others were relevant to the facts and preparation of the case....
Chipper Jones, Your Ass Makes Women Go Crazy
A little moment of levity to break up all the dark vibes floating around would be nice, yes? Well, you can thank this woman sitting in the front row at Shithole Fenway Park watching Chipper take some hacks in the on-deck circle. Chipper is in the middle of his goodbye tour and it appears one fan w...
Kevin Durant's Post-Game Tears Are Sad, Chilling
While the Heat celebrated their second NBA championship on the court, Kevin Durant's private-turned-public moment caught plenty of attention as tears streamed down the Thunder star's face as he hugged his mother....
Plaxico Burress Wants To Play For The Panthers. The Panthers Do Not Want Plaxico Burress To Play For The Panthers.
Who wants a possibly washed-up wide receiver on the wrong side of 35 and still carrying plenty of baggage? Burress didn't actually have a bad season with the Jets, his first post-prison. It was just underwhelming, with major drops in catches, yards and scores—and football players are not one of thos...
Everyone Relax: The Guy Burning The Kevin Durant Jersey Isn't A Thunder Fan
This Twitter photo of a man in a Braves cap setting fire to a Kevin Durant jersey is making the rounds this morning. There's all kinds of hand-wringing about Thunder fans and fake fans and bandwagoners and what do you people want, James Harden was cold and Russell Westbrook made a dumb mistake and S...
The New Best Place For A Home Run Derby: An Aircraft Carrier
This morning I lamented that our country is falling woefully behind in the "playing sports where sports aren't meant to be played" arms race. Several readers were quick to point out that I was wrong, and America continues to rock faces. Yesterday, the Class A South Atlantic League held the first r...
The U.S. Open Trophy Ceremony Videobomber Is A Deforestation Activist Named "Jungle Bird"
The roosterlike fellow who invaded last night's U.S. Open trophy ceremony and earned a scolding from champion Webb Simpson has been identified as a kooky deforestation activist named "Jungle Bird."...