ants Page 113 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Take A Look At Tim Lincecum's Brand New Jordanesque Logo
Tim Lincecum will be on the mound (and on the Magazine cover) as the Giants open their season this evening with an 8 p.m. EST game against the Dodgers. There's always been something about Lincecum that suggests an aversion to selling-out or going for products (it's the long hair; I'm stereotyping) s...
Gregg Easterbrook Puts The Final, Retarded Exclamation Point On Obama's Bracketology-Gate
You only need to see the headline and the byline to know what you're in for with yesterday's breathtakingly pointless Easterbrook essay about President Obama filling out a March Madness bracket. Yes, some people are still actually debating this. BLACKIEHUSSEINBRACKETGATE! Let's dive in, shall we? ...
Derrick Rose Made This Young Hawks Fan Cry
Your morning roundup for March 22 23, the day Glenn Beck contemplated launching his own channel, and we all contemplated launching ourselves off bridges....
Dez Bryant Ejected, Maybe Banned From Mall Because Of Saggy Pants
Before the 2010 NFL Draft, Dallas Morning News columnist and/or contemporary of Montesquieu Jean-Jacques Taylor took issue with anonymous NFL types who doubted Dez Bryant's character. Taylor wrote, "His biggest flaw: He is habitually late. No joke. That's the most serious criticism leveled at Bryant...
The Giants' Season Ticket Amnesty And The Tyranny Of Good PR
This broke late last week, but we were too busy paying attention to actual sporting events to deal with it. But we're forced to now, because certain folks in the media won't shut up about how classy the New York Football Giants are for not requiring fans to make their season ticket payments while th...
They Ruined The Goddamn Bracket
I was ready for the 68-team field to fuck with the process of filling out a bracket for your NCAA office pool. But I didn't quite realize the extent of it until yesterday, when they unveiled just how this retarded new format will work....
The Real Villains Of The NFL Lockout: A Gentle Reminder
The current collective bargaining agreement between the NFL and its players union ends at 11:59 p.m. this evening. And whether or not there's an official lockout, or the union decertifies, or whatever other bargaining tactic is deployed, the business of football effectively ends tonight regardless....
Please Take Your Trick Shot Video And Shove It Up Your Cockhole
Seriously. Unless there's someone who is brave enough to drop a baby off a high-dive through a basketball rim, Deadspin is longer interested in trick shot videos....
Verizon Wireless Store Employees Are The Devil’s Afterbirth
Yesterday I had to go to a Verizon Wireless store to get the numbers from my old phone transferred over to a phone I had just purchased. (Not an iPhone. Fuck you for owning one, Mr. I Can Afford A Data Plan.) And after 15 minutes in that fucking store, I can now say, without hyperbole, that Verizon ...
Now, Blake Griffin Is Posterizing Backboards With His Head
Your morning roundup for Feb. 17, the day local politics in at least one American city gets real (entertaining)....
How Ferrari spins
The ecstasy of driving a new Ferrari is almost always eradicated by the pain of dealing with Ferrari. It's out of control; to the point it will soon be pointless believing anything you read about its cars. [Jalopnik]...
A-Rod Gets Upset Over Popcorn Shot In Most A-Rod Way Possible
Believe it or not, Alex Rodriguez reportedly "went ballistic" after finding out that Fox ran this loving moment with girlfriend Cameron Diaz during the Super Bowl. He accused the cameraman of being "out to get them in a paparazzi-like shot," which, according to Bill Zwecker's source, is crazy becaus...
Guns N' Peas Is Where The Trajectory Of Man Began Its Steady Decline
So the Black Eyed Peas covered "Sweet Child O Mine" at the Super Bowl last night, with Slash helping out on guitar. First of all, FUCK YOU SLASH. You just spent the last bit of goodwill you earned from NOT being Axl. Secondly, the journey to our eventual self-extinction has begun....
"You Guys Are Little Bitches," Said Amani Toomer To His Roller-Hockey Opponents
A brief story about the former Giants wide receiver and his roller-hockey league (!) in Wallington, N.J., courtesy a twice-forwarded email....
This Is Why The BCS Eats A Pile Of Shit
What a wonderful way to end the 2010 college football season. Oh, did I say "Wonderful"? Because I meant to say "underwhelming" and "fucking abysmal."...
What Happens On A Directional Punt, And Why Coughlin Shouldn't Have Lost His Shit
Go ahead, blame the kicker. Chase him down while the play is still live and let everyone at home know whose fault this loss is. It's yours, Matt Dodge! It's all your fault!...
If Tom Coughlin Really Said This To A Teary-Eyed Matt Dodge, He's Quite The Monstrous Dick
This from Philly radio loudmouth Howard Eskin's Twitter: "After Eagles game learned that NY coach T. Coughlin saw his punter in tears. Told him get out of locker room. No longer on this team." And this. But Dodge remains....
A Heartfelt Essay From An Eagles Fan About Yesterday's Win Over The Giants
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!...
A Heartfelt Essay From A Giants Fan About Yesterday's Loss To The Eagles
The Giants broke me yesterday in much the same way Ernest Hemingway described going broke: Slowly, then all at once. I can't read any papers today or turn on the radio. I've been snippy with coworkers who dared share their sympathies....