ants Page 123 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Terrible Defensive Shortstop Miguel Tejada Is Angry At San Francisco Media For Writing About His Terrible Defense
So the Giants acquired Proven October Shortstop™ Orlando Cabrera from Cleveland yesterday, because their GM, Brian Sabean, is a veteran-loving fool who doesn't have eyes, apparently....
Plaxico Burress Will Resume His Career In The City That Incarcerated Him
Former Steelers and Giants WR Plaxico Burress has signed a one-year deal with the Jets. Burress did 21 months in prison after he shot himself in the leg at a club, but he wasn't wearing sweatpants. ...
All Too Good, And Not Good Enough: What Carlos Beltran Meant To The Mets
Carlos Beltran was not a New York Met. I don't mean this literally — Beltran's Mets career spanned six and a half seasons, from 2005 until yesterday. He was with the Mets almost exactly as long as Keith Hernandez was, and longer than Reggie Jackson was with the Yankees....
Nixon's Nightmare Was Brought To Life At The White House Today
The world champion San Francisco Giants, accompanied by Willie Mays, visited the White House today, in all their scraggly, bearded glory. President Obama made jokes about Brian Wilson's beard ("I do fear it"), his attire ("Now underneath Brian's beard, and the spandex tuxedo, and the sea captain cos...
Hey, Kids: If You Sulk On TV, The Giants PR Team Will Reward You
In San Francisco, they make sure the kids develop a sense of entitlement at an early age....
Zubazpalooza > MC Hammer Bobblehead Night
The long-awaited MC Hammer bobblehead night finally arrived in Oakland yesterday, and it was rather exciting for everyone involved....
Giants' Cable Partner Looking For Baby Resulting From Celebratory Post-World-Series Love-Makin'
The San Francisco Giants are a little zanier than the other MLB teams. That's just how it is. Note, for example, some of their upcoming special events at the ballpark: Singles Night (presented by Captain Morgan), "Law & Disorder" Legal Professionals Night, Bill Graham Tribute Night, and, our favorit...
American Patriot Tim Howard Thinks Soccer Ceremonies In America Should Be Conducted In American English
Your morning roundup for June 26, a day after a man who lost his arm to a rocket in Afghanistan caught a foul ball....
This Month In Great Quotes
"We don't have a dress code policy. Obviously, if their private parts are exposed, that's not appropriate. ... So if they're not exposing their private parts, they're allowed to fly." — US Airways spokeswoman Valerie Wunder....
Miss USA Candidates Attempt To Answer A Question About Evolution, Fail At It
I'll warn you that this video, compiled and edited by the Miami New Times, is uniquely horrific. In it, Miss USA Pageant 2011 contestants attempt to answer — or simply to formulate words in a coherent sentence about the idea proposed — whether or not evolution should be taught in schools. The New ...
Cock-Sucking Son Of A Bitch MLB Players Were Warned About Swearing, Those Cunt-Lapping Bastards
As part of an 1898 campaign to curb the use of foul language in baseball, this memo was purportedly sent to every team. It stands as a fascinating record of Gay Nineties profanity, which doesn't actually sound outdated at all....
LeBron James Is STILL A Cocksucker
If you missed last night's schaudenfreudegasm with LeBron and the Heat getting lane-raped by J.J. Barea for 48 minutes, oh how you missed out. There hasn't been a more gratifying moment for sports haters since the Saints beat Favre and Manning back-to-back in the NFC title game and Super Bowl. It w...
Why Men Send Dong Shots To People
We've all had a good laugh about Anthony Weiner using his Twitter account to show the world that white Congressmen can have surprisingly decent-sized cocks. And we here at Deadspin have gotten a great deal of mileage out of men who, in fit of passion, decided to take pictures of their dicks and send...
OK, For The Last Time: Plaxico Burress Was Not Wearing Sweatpants The Night He Shot Himself
The night he busted a cap in his thigh, Plaxico Burress was wearing jeans. This is a fact confirmed both by the New York County District Attorney's Office and Burress himself. He was not wearing sweatpants. There is as much proof that he wore sweatpants that night as there is that he wore a crinolin...
Here's The Giants' "It Gets Better" Video
This isn't a huge thing, but it's a good thing. [Giants.com, Itgetsbetter.org]...
Buster Posey's Foot Bent The Wrong Way After A Home Plate Collision Last Night
Scott Cousins sealed a Marlins win in the 12th inning last night, by way of a full-force collision with Giants catcher Buster Posey at home plate. The tackle left Posey with a serious leg injury (in the last second-to-last angle here, especially, you can see his right ankle bend in such a way that...
I’ll Wear Shorts If I Goddamn Want To
Memorial Day weekend is coming to mark the start of summer, and once again I find myself confronted with assholes all over the place telling me I can't wear shorts. First there's designer Tom Ford:...
Cool Old Photos Show Willie Mays As You've Never Seen Him, I.E. Starting A Pillow Fight
Today, as they tend to do, the LIFE photography archives released a beautiful selection of never-before-seen photographs. The new collection, released 60 years to the day after Willie Mays' major league debut on May 25, 1951, is of the Hall of Famer's earlier years as a professional baseball player....
Barry Bonds Will Pay To Send Beaten Giants Fan's Kids To College
This is actually great: Barry Bonds, the star of Bob Costas's nightmares, will provide scholarships for Bryan Stow's two grade-school-age children. Stow was brutally beaten at Dodger Stadium in March for wearing a Giants jersey. His condition is slowly improving, and police recently arrested a suspe...