ap Page 1546 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Whole SYSTEM Is Out Of Order!
Oh, how nice it is to take a trip to the halcyon days of yesteryear, to revisit — again ... and again ... and again — our old friends Renee Thomas and Angela Keathley, the Carolina Panthers lesbian cheerleaders. (Honestly, it's so warm having them back in the news again, like going back and visiti...
In Remembrance Of Lil Ronnie
In the wake of the Colts' loss yesterday, we feel obliged to give our sincerest sympathies to Lil Ronnie, the dope phat rappin' 12-year-old Indianapolis dawg, whose old-school raps about the Colts in the Super Bowl influenced some of the biggest names in rap today, including Doug Dogggg, the eigh...
NFL Playoff Roundup: One Big Idiot Kicker
• Ordinarily, we come down on the side of kickers, if just because we have much more of a physical resemblance to them than 350-pound ogre lineman. But it's pretty much impossible to feel much sympathy for Colts gakker Mike Vanderjagt, whose missed field goal yesterday was somehow the perfect endi...
Panthers vs. Bears - 4th Quarter
• Fullback Jason McKie gets the Bears into the endzone to make it a 2-point game. I'll be honest, I wasn't expecting this game to be able to hold a candle to the earlier game, but it's been outstanding. The Bears are going to need to come up with a stop, though....
Panthers vs. Bears - 3rd Quarter
• If the Bears want to win, two things have to happen. 1) Rex Grossman has to remain competent, and 2) the defense has got to make some adjustments. Giving up 290 yards in a half isn't going to cut it....
Panthers vs. Bears - 2nd Quarter
• John Kasay converts, and makes it 10-0 Carolina. I know it's early, but the Bears are not the Colts. 10 points is a huge hole for them....
Panthers vs. Bears - 1st Quarter
• Well, that didn't take long. Steve Smith gets loose in the secondary and the Panthers are on the board. It's 7-0 before a minute is gone....
Steelers vs. Colts - 3rd Quarter
• Ah, it's the annual Punt, Pass, and Kick competition at halftime, but Dick Enberg is going to make me wait until the start of the 4th quarter to find out who won. DAMN you, Dick Enberg. I have $400 on David Giroux to win the 8-year-old division....
Steelers vs. Colts - 2nd Quarter
• Nick Harper update: The knee he injured was not the knee that the wife sliced up, which I guess is good news....
Steelers vs. Colts - 1st Quarter
• Nick Harper is indeed in the line-up, a direct condemnation of Danielle Harper's stabbing skills. So, if you were a trash-talking opposing defensive back, would you go there? I'd go there....
Mr. and Mrs. Harper
Starting Colts CB Nick Harper is listed as questionable for the Steelers game after his wife allegedly sank a knife in his knee. The Colts, with more of the deception that Joey Porter so loathes, initially tried to pawn it off as a "traffic accident." Hamilton County Sheriff Doug Carter begged to ...
Ah, the Joys of Baseball Trade Rumors
We're admittedly a little tingly about this rumored Abreu-for-Manny-for-Miggy scuttlebutt that's been tossed around, oh, the last couple months. As a Philly fan, it'd be easy to see the town completely embracing Ramirez. Granted, they'll get on him about that whole "hustle" thing, but the same com...
Playoff Pants Party! Steelers at Colts
More ugliness. This would be horrible if the Steeler's won this game. Please. This can't happen. We really need to see the Patriots/Colts decide this thing once and for all.(Erm, this season, at least.) (Yes, barring the Broncos don't screw it up, either.)...
Playoff Pants Party! Carolina Panthers at Chicago Bears
Hey, look it's 2001 all over again in Chicago! Long live Shane Matthews! Sunday's Carolina Panthers at Chicago Bears game could very well prove to be the offensive shoot-out we're all anticipating. We're predicting about 850 yards of offense between these two teams. With these two offensive flame t...
The Tecmo Bowl Playoff Preview
The glory of Tecmo Bowl has been well documented all across this great Interweb, but we're still suckers for it every time. Like most of you, we suspect, we spent a large percentage of our formative years playing Tecmo Bowl; with Timm Rosenbach, Johnny Johnson and J.T. Smith, our Phoenix Cardinals...
The Downside Of Faith And Football
When we first started this site, we were wondering the best places to find sources from within teams to dish some dirt. We figured beat reporters, sports information guys, groupies, so on. But one friend told us: "Team chaplains. Those guys know everything. Might be tough to get them to talk, thou...
NFL Playoff Roundup: Riiiiipppppp!
• Honestly, we know this was covered all weekend, but man, that Carson Palmer thing was the worst playoff moment we can remember. We think Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals have it tough; Bengals fans finally get in the playoffs, and two plays in, their Pro Bowl QB tears an ACL and MCL. (Quest...
Panthers vs. Giants - 4th Quarter
• If Ken Lucas and Marlon McCree played for the Giants, Eli Manning would be on fire. Unfortunately for Eli, however, they are Panthers. McCree did do the Giants a favor, though, and run about 20 yards backwards after the interception. But that probably just means DeShaun Foster has more yardage ...
Panthers vs. Giants - 3rd Quarter
• The Giants brought out Lawrence Taylor to be honored at halftime. This could provide some inspiration for the G-Men. Particularly if LT brought his pipe with him....