ap Page 1810 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

That'll Be All For The Leafs
It's the NHL Closer. We pass the mic to the kids at Orland Kurtenblog. Their NHL Closer is written by Canadians for Americans....

The Patriots Are, For One Night, Almost Mortal
The Eagles might have fallen just short tonight, but three important things happened....

The Capitals Are Still On A Winning Streak!
• In Boudreau They Trust. Alexander Ovechkin tickled twine twice and Michael Nylander had a goal and two assists as the Capitals won their second straight under interim coach Bruce Boudreau. Caps 5, Hurricanes 2. The consecutive victories are DC's first since early October, the end of a three-game w...

The Capitals Are On A Winning Streak
It's the NHL Closer. I now snatch the mic from the kids at Orland Kurtenblog. "Hey, karaoke man, punch in System's "Chop Suey" will ya? The pipes feel strong today." This NHL Closer is written by a Canadian for Americans, Africans and Australians. That's it. So screw off, Luxembourgers....

Thanksgiving Games As Uninspiring As Always
As usual, the Thanksgiving Day slate of games yesterday was hardly compelling. All three games were blowouts, and it's never a positive sign when the most dramatic moment involves the phrase, "hey, the Lions are within 15 now!"...

Baseball Loses A Trailblazer
It is truly a sad day in the world of baseball: Kaz Tadano, the Japanese former relief pitcher for the Indians, has decided to return to Japan. We already miss him....

This Is Why People Hate High School
Everybody knows that the only thing on earth better than cheerleaders are cheerleaders who flash some ass. Despite this universal understanding the Modesto City Gestapo School Board are allowing cheerleaders to be suspended for flashing their panties....


Past, Present And Future Football Action
Brett Favre joined Dan Marino as the only quarterbacks in NFL history to throw for 60,000 yards during the Packers' 34-0 shellacking of the Vikings today. (Yes! I started the GB defense this week!) Adrian Peterson injured his knee thanks to an Al Harris helmet shot, but Jesus eventually rose and mad...

Just Like Indiana Jones, But Not
Non-Football TV • 12:30 — Sahara [TNT] • 1:00 — Bowling: PBA Etonic Championship [ESPN] • 1:00 — Boxing: Mike Tyson's Greatest Hits [ESPNC] • 1:00 — Golf: LPGA Tournament of Champions, Final-Round [GOLF] • 1:00 — Reindeer Games [FLIXe] • 1:00 — Rounders [FX] • 1:45 — Richie Rich [TBS] • 2:30 — NCAA ...

Colts Can't Quiet Din Of Controversy
The search is on for the brave, mysterious security guard who blew the whistle on the Indianapolis Colts' apparent efforts to pipe in extra crowd noise in the RCA Dome on Sunday. It didn't take long for the team's house of lies to come crumbling down, once WBZ photojournalist Bryan Foley was on the ...

Welcome To The NHL, Kid
Toronto Maple Leafs forward Jiri Tlusty is one of the top young prospects in the NHL, and he scored two goals a couple weeks ago despite only being 19 years old. So how is he welcomed to the big time? Some Canadian Perez Hilton knockoff site keeps calling him gay....


Get Your Disgusting Piece Of Red Sox Memorabilia Here
What, you might ask, is that little piece of biomatter next to that dime? We're kind of afraid to tell you....

Tickets Prices At Fenway Have Increased Somewhat
A reader, digging through some of their dad's old things, found a relic from the mid-80s that couldn't be more dated than if it showed a picture of Flock of Seagulls....

Norval the Franchise Killer
The best thing about PJ's record-breaking performance might be this picture of Norv Turner reacting to the horror he's forced to witness. This might be my new favorite photograph of all time. I think I'm going to send it off to be made into a custom Fathead. Or maybe I can have it airbrushed onto my...

Patriots Fail to Cover Spread, Claim Hollow Victory
• Was there ever any doubt? You could tell that it was just a matter of time before Tom Brady and Randy Moss could stick a dagger through the Indianapolis defense. For three quarters Tony Dungy's Colts controlled the field, but you can't keep a good man down long, and the same can be said of Bill Be...

About Last Night
What you missed while walking your Omen devil hound ... • NFL: Yes, they are booing you, Terrell. But they are gentle boos ... boos of love. Cowboys 38, Eagles 17. • NBA: Pistons are back at full strength; look out, world. • NASCAR: Jimmie Johnson wins at Texas Motor Speedway, takes Nextel Cup lead,...

New England Patriots Are The Saviors Of Alefgard
And there it is. The New England Patriots collected the Stones of Sunlight, the Staff of Rain, and the Token of Erdrick. Tom Brady will promptly whisk Princess Gwaelin away to a bed and breakfast somewhere south of Cantlin. Meanwhile, Bill Belichick will now reproduce a set of Erdrick weapons and ar...

Championship Team Takes 13-7 Halftime Lead Over Legendary Team
Marvin Harrison isn't playing in the game, which my keen awareness picked up on sometime in the first quarter. So the backup No. 1 wide receiver for the Colts happens to be Joseph Addai, I guess. He has 107 yards receiving on top of his usual job of 80 yards rushing. He's also filling in for three b...