appic Page 143 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Female Basketball Stars Hate Age Rules, Too
Epiphanny Prince, who briefly made people care about high school girls basketball when she scored 2,493 points in a game, now plans to leave Rutgers early and play abroad, just like the boys. We got next! In Krakow!...

Alex Rodriguez Image Rehabilitation Tour Continues
The non-shocking news that Sammy Sosa is a cheater is so outrageous (not really) that it almost makes you forget about....what's his name? Maybe this Yankee baseball player with the soft and supple handshake will distract you from all that....

L.A. To Lakers: Throw Your Own Damn Parade
We all had lots of fun joking that Pittsburgh was a bankrupt urban hellscape, but at least the city could afford to throw its hockey team a victory parade. Los Angeles? They think they left their wallet in another state....

Depressed Urban Zone Saved By Valiant Sports Team
All of Pittsburgh's troubles as a shrunken post-war manufacturing center are over now that the city has its third Stanley Cup championship and its second major sports title this year. Detroit, sadly, will be boarded up and shipped to Borneo....

Nicklas Lidstrom's Busted Ballsack And Other Tales Of NHL Woe
If Detroit captain Nicklas Lidstrom looked a little sluggish at times during this Stanley Cup Finals, he has a very, very, very good excuse. He suffered a "nearly catastrophic" testicle injury in the Conference Finals. Now how do you feel?...

Bob Huggins Now Sporting Non-Metaphorical Black Eyes
Huggins, the bail bondsman who coaches college basketball games in his spare time, showed up to a fundraiser wearing shiners on either eye. The explanation? He lost a fight with his bathroom door. It happens....

George Foreman III Wins First Professional "Fight"
One of George Foreman's eponymous sons began his illustrious boxing career with a time-honored tradition—beating up on a human tomato can. Everyone involved in the making of this post should be ashamed of themselves. (I know I am.)...

The First Cut Is The Deepest
If a hockey team scores the first goal of the game in the first five minutes, they have a 70% of winning the game. Just don't tell Gary Bettman or NHL games will only last six minutes. [Live Science]...

Barca Loon Attempts To Rattle Federer With Annoying Flag-To-The-Face Taunt
During the second set of the French Open, Roger Federer was hassled by a person waving a Barcelona flag, who somehow managed to make his way onto the Roland Garros court and get all up in Federer's face....

Your Last 300-Game Winner
Did you enjoy Randy Johnson's afternoon skewering of the Nationals? Because you'll probably never get a chance to see that again. (The 300th win part, not the Nationals getting skewered.) [Jayson Stark; Seattle Times]...

Red Wings Show Their Age, Penguins Show Them The Door
For the first time in the Stanley Cup Finals, the Red Wings looked sad and old, while the younger, vitamin-eating Penguins skated circles around them to even the series. And none of us stayed up to watch "The Tonight Show."...

Serena Williams Bounced From French Open
A three-set loss to Svetlana Kuznetsova. So both Williams sisters, Maria Sharapova, the chick with the giant rack, and the shrieking girl are out of the French Open. It's almost like they're daring you to pay attention. [Roland Garros]...

I Guess Pittsburgh Isn't Laying Down Quietly
The Penguins got a home game last night and now everything has changed! After taking care of Detroit in a must-win Game 3, the Stanley Cup Finals have become, say it with me ... a series....

Red Wings Wondering If Game 3 Could Please Be Played Tonight
Everyone was a little concerned about the "two games in two days" thing, especially the Detroit Red Wings who are old and don't walk so good anymore, but after the way they've handled the Penguins this weekend, they would probably like to wrap things up with a day-night doubleheader today....

We Were All Witnesses
"Well, that guy is not in the league anymore. The other 2-3 is now on the good side now. That other 2-3 is gone, so we don't have to worry about that no more." [LeBron James, after his last-second shot won Game 2 of the Eastern Conference Finals]...

A Lonely Voice Rises To Defend Todd Tichenor
Umpire Todd Tichenor has been savaged—savaged!—by citizens of the cyberworld for getting a little ejection happy last night, but there is one anonymous internet commenter who will not stand for this aggression! Rights will be wronged, one message board at a time....

Todd Tichenor Got His Money's Worth Last Night
Umpire Todd Tichenor made history (maybe? probably not) when he ejected four people in one inning of the Red Sox-Twins game last night. Hey, when you're a temporarily fill-in just called up from the minors, you've got to take your shots when you can get them....

A Game Of “Healthy Fat Or Unhealthy Fat” With Martellus Bennett
Our Deadcast guest this week is none other than Martellus Bennett: tight end for the Dallas Cowboys, expert blogger and renowned Twitter fiend....

Sidney Crosby Taunts The Hockey Gods
The Penguins polished off a nice cold pitcher of Hurricanes last night, earning a return trip to the Stanley Cup Finals and a chance at redemption. Then captain Sidney Crosby just thumbed his nose at all that by skating around the ice with the Prince of Wales Trophy....

Uh Oh, Cleveland
No one is saying the city of Cleveland should be panicking right now, but it does seem like hoarding canned goods and putting your life savings into mason jars would not be the worst idea in the world. All is ... not well....