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![Police Report: Cardinals GM Steve Keim Tried To Name-Drop A Dead Cop During His DUI Arrest [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/jvbsrzg5kkjd6e31w7ev.jpg)
Police Report: Cardinals GM Steve Keim Tried To Name-Drop A Dead Cop During His DUI Arrest [Update]
Arizona Cardinals general manager Steve Keim misidentified his job when pulled over and cited for DUI on July 4, and told police that he “works” with an officer who died four years ago, according to the police report. [Update, see below.]...

Cardinals President Michael Bidwill, Who Wants To Get Back To Football, Uses Team To Make Political Statement
As the case of Colin Kaepernick has shown, silent demonstration is employment poison in the NFL. If a person wants to push their political views, it’s best to be in charge of a team, so they can also co-opt said team’s website and Twitter account to stump for an old high school chum....

D-Backs Catcher Jeff Mathis Pitches, Serves Up A Juicy Homer, Loses
With a depleted bullpen in Sunday’s 16-inning showdown against the Padres, the Diamondbacks turned to backup catcher Jeff Mathis to pitch in a tie game. Seeing a position player pitch is always fun—hey, they’re not supposed to do that!—but it’s not often that they actually determine the outcome of t...

Arizona Cardinals GM Steve Keim Cited For Driving Under The Influence On July 4
Arizona Cardinals general manager Steve Keim was charged with driving under the influence after a traffic stop in Arizona the night of July 4, reports KTAR News 92.3. AZ Central says Keim was nabbed by a checkpoint in Chandler, southeast of Phoenix, just after midnight on July 5, and was released f...

Diamondbacks Reliever Archie Bradley Bravely Admits He Shit His Pants Before Entering A Game This Season
Brewers pitcher Adrian Houser barfing on the mound earlier this month was gross, but Diamondbacks reliever Archie Bradley has his own bodily-substance story to contribute to the discourse. On the Yahoo Sports MLB Podcast, Bradley courageously confessed to shitting his pants immediately prior to a re...


Unwritten Rules Lead To Nine Unanswered Runs
The Diamondbacks were toast. Joe Musgrove was dealing for the Pirates, allowing Arizona just four hits through six as Pittsburgh sat on a 5-0 lead. “We were lying flat,” D-Backs manager Torey Lovullo said. And then the Pirates had to go and put a leadoff batter on. Retaliation, you know. Unwritten r...

A.J. Pollock Smashed His Thumb On What Wound Up Being An Inside-The-Park Homer
A.J. Pollock has been among the top National League players in WAR for much of this young season, but he also just cannot catch a break. In the ninth inning of the Diamondbacks’ 7-2 loss to the Brewers Monday, the outfielder laid the hell out for a Tyler Saladino line drive that turned into an insid...

Steven Souza Appreciates Mothers
Diamondbacks outfielder Steven Souza was mic’d up during yesterday’s game against the Nationals, and that was good news for anyone who likes their baseball accompanied by wry commentary....

Diamondbacks Trying To Set Land Speed Record In Stadium Financing Scam<em></em>
After the Maricopa County Board of Supervisors voted 4-1 to end a 16-month legal fight with the Diamondbacks on Wednesday, the team will now be allowed to leave their current ballpark for a shiny new stadium as early as 2022, five years before their 30-year agreement to play in their current ballpar...

Brandon Williams, Who Recently De-Committed From Arizona, Commits To Arizona
Top high school player Brandon Williams de-committed from Arizona back in early March, citing the “current climate surrounding U of A” in the wake of ESPN’s report of Wildcats coach Sean Miller being caught via FBI wiretap offering money to then-recruit DeAndre Ayton. The climate must’ve changed, be...

They Finally Used The Bullpen Cart!
In the bottom of the sixth inning of Saturday’s Astros-Diamondbacks game, Houston reliever Collin McHugh was called in from the bullpen to relieve starter Charlie Morton. That is all the detail you’re gonna get, here, because BULLPEN CART BULLPEN CART BULLPEN CART!...

Josh Rosen Was "Pissed" About Falling In The Draft
Former UCLA quarterback Josh Rosen was selected with the 10th overall pick in last night’s NFL draft, behind fellow quarterback prospects Baker Mayfield, Sam Darnold, and Josh Allen. Living up to his pre-draft reputation as a guy who speaks his mind, Rosen admitted in post-draft interviews that he w...

Killjoy Rule Turns Mighty Dinger Into Lousy Single
In the top of the fourth inning of Saturday’s 9-1 win over the Dodgers, with men on first and second, Diamondbacks third baseman Deven Marrero smoked a ball to deep left center, where it cleared the wall and became a dinger. But the box score will not remember it as a three-run dinger; instead it wi...

Benches Clear In Diamondbacks-Cardinals When Yadier Molina Goes After Opposing Manager
A balls-and-strikes argument between Diamondbacks manager Torey Lovullo and home plate umpire Tim Timmons went in an unexpected direction this afternoon, when Lovullo apparently said something to Timmons that pissed off Cardinals catcher Yadier Molina:...

What The Hell Is Herm Edwards Talking About?
Herm Edwards is already facing plenty of doubters, not to mention adversity, as he tries to coach at Arizona State in his first college season since 1989. Early moments from Herm on the job have been both bizarre and kind of adorably weird, and at a press conference yesterday where he talked about p...

Idiot On The Field At Diamondbacks Game Is Tripped, Takes Surprisingly Long Time To Fall
The crack of the bat. The smell of glove leather. Enormous American flags. Cracker Jacks. An idiot on the field, sprinting half-clothed through Arizona’s outfield. Baseball is back!...

Sean Miller Says He's Not Yet Desperate Enough To Go To Pitt
March has not been kind to Sean Miller. The Arizona men’s college basketball coach—who may or may not have been caught on an FBI wiretap arranging to pay DeAndre Ayton $100K—has no recruits coming to Tucson next year, and his squad vacated their bowels against 13-seed Buffalo in the first round of t...

Arizona Avoids Vacating Future Tournament Wins<em></em>
Buffalo pulled off the biggest upset of the NCAA men’s tournament so far, knocking out fourth-seeded Arizona in a game that became a blowout in the second half. ...