arsenal Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Now, If Only Liverpool Could Stop Losing To Minnows
On consecutive days in August, Liverpool defeated Barcelona 4-0 and lost to Mainz 0-4 in exhibition matches. Seven months later, it is clear those results were an eerie foreshadowing of how Liverpool’s season would play out....
Arsene Wenger Can't Get Enough Of Managing Arsenal Because He Loves Pain
With Arsenal fourth in the table, 13 points behind league leaders Chelsea, and still raw from a 5-1 Champions League thumping at the hands of Bayern Munich, the season that started so auspiciously for the Gunners is not panning out as expected. ...
Premier League Ref: Arsène Wenger Told Me To "Fuck Off"
About a month ago, Arsène Wenger got himself a four-match touchline ban for his behavior in a league game between Arsenal and Burnley. We all knew part of the ban was because Wenger pushed the fourth official after being sent to the stands by the head referee, but we didn’t know what exactly he said...
Fed-Up Chileans Organize March To Convince Alexis Sánchez To Leave Arsenal
Alexis Sánchez, the pride of Chile, is one of the best soccer players on the planet. He’s also trapped on a bullshit team that kind of sucks, where—amazing goals and dribbles and passes be damned—he’ll probably never win anything of major consequence. To top it off, his bullshit team is balking at p...
Arsène Wenger Says He Will Manage Next Season, But Maybe Not At Arsenal
Arsenal had a big match in the Champions League on Wednesday, which is another way of saying Arsenal were yet again monumentally embarrassed in a huge moment. Arsenal are also right about at the start of the end stretch of their season, which is another way of saying that Arsenal are already out of ...
Alexis Sánchez Does Two Bad Things, Saves Self By Doing Good Thing
Arsenal’s Alexis Sánchez had a chance to level up the game against Bayern Munich with a penalty. He took a bad one, and it was saved. Oops! Thankfully, the ball bounced kindly into his path for an easy rebound. Only he botched that with a whiffed shot. Oops again! The soccer gods smiled on Alexis, t...
Arjen Robben Teaches Arsenal Why You Can't Let Him Cut In On His Left Foot
Yes, everyone knows it’s coming. And everyone also knows that the whole point is that even though everyone knows it’s coming, it’s still impossible to stop. And yet it remains hard to watch a team allow Arjen Robben to get onto his left foot and do what he always does, as he’s just done to Arsenal:...
Eden Hazard Makes Arsenal Look Like Children
Chelsea doubled its lead on Arsenal early in the second half as Eden Hazard wove his way past a Gunners squad apparently completely made up of the family members of neighboring Mr. Bean. ...
Danny Welbeck Is Back
Starting for Arsenal for the first time in nine months today, Danny Welbeck is clearly not bothered any more by the knee injury that kept him sidelined for so long. Welbeck scored the first two goals of the day and helped out on the third to put Arsenal up 3-0 over Southampton in the FA Cup, showing...
Arsène Wenger Banned Four Games For Pushing Referee
Arsenal will be sans grouchy zipper savant/manager Arsene Wenger for four games, after the English F.A. formally banned him this morning. Wenger was charged with misconduct on Monday for an outburst during last weekend’s win over Burnley....
Granit Xhaka Interviewed By Police After Allegedly Calling Airport Worker A "Fucking White Bitch"
Arsenal midfielder Granit Xhaka was in London’s Heathrow Airport yesterday to see off his girlfriend’s brother on a flight to Germany. Things didn’t go as planned, though, and when the brother learned that he would miss his flight, Xhaka allegedly blew up on an employee of the airport, calling the w...
Arsène Wenger Charged By F.A. After Pushing Referee
Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger has now been formally charged with misconduct by the English F.A. after a spat he instigated with the referees during yesterday’s Premier League match against Burnley....
Aaron Ramsey Golazo Draws Arsenal Even
Aaron Ramsey helped wake up a pathetic-looking Arsenal early in the second half of the Gunners’ FA Cup match at Preston North End with this rocket golazo from just outside the box that left keeper Chris Maxwell hopeless. Credit, too, to Alex Iwobi’s heroism in holding onto the ball despite defenders...
Good God, This Olivier Giroud Backheel Volley Is Gorgeous
Early in today’s Arsenal game against Crystal Palace, Olivier Giroud offered this work of art:...
The Arsenaling Of Arsenal's Season Has Begun
“It’s a horrible week,” Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger admitted after losing to a short-handed and off-form Manchester City team on Sunday—this just a few days after losing to an off-form Everton team in similarly depressing fashion. As expected, this season that looked like it might be The One is be...
The 300-Year Journey From Classical Standard To Gay Disco Anthem To The Most Iconic Anthem In Soccer
The first leg of the 1994 UEFA Cup Winners’ Cup semi-final between Arsenal and Paris Saint-Germain at the Parc Des Princes was rife with the tensions of early ‘90s provincial fandom. “The Boulogne Boys [PSG’s right-wing hooligan supporters] were looking for Arsenal fans to attack in the build-up to ...
Arsenal Take 1-0 Lead On "X-Rated" "Horror Story"
Arsenal took an early 1-0 lead on Bournemouth thanks to Steve Cook’s massive boner that Ian Darke called “X-rated”:...
The Champions League Was Lousy With Great Goals Today
The Champions League is the best collection of great teams and players that there is in the sport. Sometimes, all those great teams and players conspire to do a bunch of great things all on the same day. Today was one of those glorious days....
If Mesut Özil Keeps Scoring Like This, The World Better Watch Out
In Arsenal’s blowout win against Ludogorets yesterday, Mesut Özil scored three goals in the second half. I repeat: Mesut “I Live To Pass And I Never, Ever Shoot So Don’t Ask Me To” Özil scored a hat trick yesterday in the Champions League, increasing his season tally to six goals in 10 games. This i...
Arsenal Are Out Here Just Embarrassing These Jamokes
This is the happy time in every Arsenal season. Everyone is healthy, their world-class players are playing up to their reputations, their really good players are playing out of their minds, and their title dreams still seem eminently, thrillingly tangible. In today’s Champions League match against L...