as Page 2196 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Stephen A.'s Career Never Too Dismal For Heckling
Stephen A. Smith's career has fallen on hard times. He's been demoted from draft analyst to pick interviewer. Rising commodity prices have pushed Cheez Doodles above $3.15 a pound. Fortunately, the Stephen A. Smith Heckling Society of Gentlemen was at this year's draft, as they were in '06 and '07, ...

Rubes Falling For Fake Stone Cold Not Really A Stunner
A fellow masquerading as "Stone Cold" Steve Austin charged some dim bulbs at a Wal-Mart in Indiana for his autograph, then hightailed it through the crowd before a bunch of referees and backstage security could detain him. He then drank a couple beers and gave some people the finger....

Marshawn Lynch Ordered Not To Get A Dashboard Hula Girl
Amid the treacly tributes to "Kitty Litter" Leitch yesterday (even ESPN The Magazine had one!!1!!EXCLAMATIONMARK!!), we missed the news that Marshawn Lynch copped to that whole hit-and-run thing that happened in May and as a result had his license suspended. Apparently he wasn't aware he hit anyone...

Sir Sidney Gives Up No Runs; Probably Ate Them All
Sidney Ponson made his unceremonious (only to Ponson, as ceremonious occasions usually have bacon gravy) return to the Yankees in the second half of a two-ballpark doubleheader yesterday with the cross-Gotham Mets. And he laid into them like they were an Aruban judge, tossing six shutout innings in ...

Say Hello To A-Rod's New Friends
A pretty outstanding tidbit that was missed in all the madness yesterday: You remember when the Brewers ended up staying at the same hotel as a Furries convention? Well, that happened again this week, in Pittsburgh, and guess what team ended up in the Pittsburgh hotel this time?...

Our Conversation With Buzz Bissinger
For the last few months, since that rather festive "Costas Now" business, we have been loathe to expand much more on our initial reaction. But as Buzz Bissinger has continued to give interviews to the "respectable" media, making his "points," we felt compelled to talk one last time, to wrap this who...

Shawn Chacon Is Now Looking For Work
Time is running out to claim Shawn Chacon on waivers! Act now, and you will receive one slightly used Major League pitcher, ERA just above 5.00, with a tendency to throttle when perturbed. Buy it now price: $2 million. Chacon was put on waivers Thursday by the Houston Astros, one day after and unfor...

About Last Night
I feel a great disturbance in The Force ... • NBA: Derrick Rose goes to Bulls with No. 1 pick; Knicks' fans cheer enthusiastically for their top choice (just kidding; they take to the streets and riot as expected). • Tennis: The days of Andy Roddick are finished. Let the Janko Tipsarevic Era begin. ...

Part XI: Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee...Will Leitch
Well, that was fun, wasn't it? I'd like to thank ALL of our roasters for their contributions to today's festivities. I can't think of a better send-off for our man. I'd also like to thank the always brilliant Jim Cooke for designing the above plaque, at last granting Will Leitch permanent immortali...

Part IX: Featuring...Kissing Suzy Kolber
Special Round Of Roasting From The Gay Mafia:...

Part VIII: A Special Message From The Dugout And Buzz Bissinger
Will’s always loved THE DUGOUT. Because hey, who doesn’t like dick jokes in a chat interface most people don’t use or understand? Take it away, gentlemen....

Part VII: The Untidy Pet-Keeping Habits Of One William F. Leitch
Here’s a fun tale from Will’s former roommate, the fabulous AMY BLAIR...

Part VI: Every Day Should Be Saturday
We all know Ron Zook pisses intensity, whereas Leitch piss is 30% meekness and 70% deference. Thankfully, the Illinois head coach took time out to send a message to Will through our good friend SPENCER HALL....

Part V: Costas Now Redux
We continue today's roasting festivities with this utterly brilliant video from the one and only JE SKEETS, who today was granted a rare work release from his Yahoo! prison....

Part IV: Featuring America's Favorite Sports Fella...Bill Simmons
Part 4 of our celebration of all things Leitch begins with a very, very special guest. He just got finished celebrating the Celtics' 17th world title. I can't wait to see it mentioned 83 times in one of his NFL columns 30 years from now. It's Bill Simmons. It really is....

Part III: The Will Leitch Live Blog
One of the most flattering compliments I've received in these, the blog days of my youth, has been from William F. Leitch regarding my live blogs, notably the Super Bowl XLII one. It's made me want to do more, but unfortunately all there is to lively blog these days is baseball, which can get rather...

The All-Star Blogebrity Roast Of William F. Leitch!
Balls Deep by Drew Magary will not be appearing this week. In its place, we bring you this very special presentation....

The Western Michigan Whitecaps Will Restore Balance To The Universe
Welcome to Minor Enterprise. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy....
