ass Page 280 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Is What Should Happen Whenever You Play A Sports Video Game
We've all been there: Playing Bulls versus Blazers on SNES, Shasta'd out of your mind, Kevin Duckworth at the line. He misses. You lose. Wouldn't you like a chance to see Duckworth—the real Duckworth—atone?...
The Messiah College Lady's Soccer Team Will Not Tolerate Peeping Toms
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
John Salley Story Corner: All Rub, No Tug From The Hotel Masseuse
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: when massages go technically right....
Crazy Lady Elisabeth Hasselbeck Has Predictably Crazy Theory About Our Brett Favre Story
Barry mentioned this earlier, but here's video of Elisabeth Hasselbeck putting on her tin-foil hat and saying it's fishy that the Brett Favre story broke the week Favre was playing the Jets. It's the dumbest conspiracy theory Favre's junk has caused....
Mike Ribeiro Arrested For Public Intoxication, May Try To Blame Bad Sushi
Good sushi restaurants are about as foreign to the Sun Belt as hockey, but that's where the Stars center and his party got into an altercation last night. Ribeiro and his wife were arrested, but made bail early this morning. [Morning News]...
Barcelona's Passing Wizardry Makes The Lakers Look Foolish
The Lakers played an exhibition against Barcelona yesterday—and lost—and with plays like this, it's easy to see why. That's some Harlem Globetrotters stuff right there on the NBA champs. [Slam]...
Last Night's Winner: The Reporter Who Asked Brett Favre About His Wang
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Brian Costello of the New York Post. If Brett Favre furnished us with his cock, then Costello rounded things out with an enormous set of balls....
When Preseason Games Of Grab-Ass Go Wrong
Last night's Raptors-Suns game featured this delightful sequence in which Reggie Evans fouled Grant Hill, which led to the two engaging in a spirited round of ironic ass-slappery. Both players were ejected. Via Skeets....
Teammate: Wayne Rooney Is "Working Class" And "Vulgar"
While most of us can't wait for this international break to be over, Man United's Federico Macheda will be hoping time goes really slowly while he's away with Italy's U21 squad, after making an "ill-advised" comment about his willy-swinging teammate Wayne Rooney....
Field Trip: Simmons And Gladwell At The New Yorker Festival, Falling In And Out Of Love
Ever wondered how the chummy love-fest email exchanges between Malcolm Gladwell and Bill Simmons translate when the two meet face-to-face? Well, it's kind of like when a "certain kind of person" meets another "certain kind of person." I'll explain....
Triple H Bangs On Doors To Get Votes For Mother-In-Law Linda McMahon
Well, if Linda McMahon's Facebook page is to be believed, she's unleashing a practitioner of the "Inverted Indian deathlock" on the voters of Fairfield, Ct. this morning....
Jags Receiver Gets Caught In Action Movie After Armed Intruder Busts In
Kassim Osgood and a ladyfriend were hanging out, when her ex-boyfriend showed up with a gun. Both were pistol-whipped, but are okay. Then, there's this: "The woman targeted him with her laser sight before both shot at each other and missed." [Times-Union]...
That's Not The Ass Of Any Old Ballplayer; That's The Ass Of A Playoff-Spot-Clinching Ballplayer (NSFW-ish)
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Let's Unpack The Best Parts Of The Clippers' White Party
Old sack of shit Donald Sterling hosted a white party for the Clippers this weekend (he's the one person in the photo here who isn't wearing white, natch). There was a lot of fun to be had. Let's take a look....
The 1970s Oakland Raiders: Boozin' And Coozin' Through El Rancho
In "Badasses," author Peter Richmond chronicles the whiskey-drinking, horse-stealing, panty-poaching lunacy that surrounded John Madden's Oakland Raiders....
Reports Of Murray Chass’s Sanity Have Been Greatly Exaggerated
Murray Chass is still writing a blog about how he hates blogs. It's pretty delightful, in an Away from Her kind of way. Sometimes he even writes about baseball. He's usually wrong. Let's say "fuck" a bunch!...
Roethlisbergerfreude Reaches Its Hilarious Apex
Reader Mike sent this in today and honestly, what's not to like about anthropomorphic toys acting like their real-world counterparts? Photoshop job or no Photoshop job, the answer is nothing....
Tuneful, Preppy Version Of "Bitches Ain't Shit" Suggests Bitches May Be Shit, After All
Oh, there's nothing quite like a post-ironic a cappella version of a white man's very ironic cover of a Dr. Dre song done by a group of spunky young tarts....
In Calvin Johnson's Version Of Events, The Referee Talks Like Kanye West
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Detroit Lion and pass dropper Calvin Johnson....
Kansas State Mistakenly Listed As A Top School, Until It Turned Out They'll Let Anybody In
The Kaplan/Newsweek College Rankings had K-State as the 16th most desirable large school, until they found out that the reported admission rates were inaccurate. Kansas State actually admits 98 percent of applicants. [Journal-World]...