ass Page 293 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A-HOLE FAN DIGEST: The Muhammad Ali Autographing Incident
Earlier today, we published a story from an anonymous reader claiming that ASU baseball coach Pat Murphy accosted him at a charity event. Here's how the story ended up being complete bullshit....
Baseball's Free Agency System Is Seriously, Seriously Screwed Up
It's hot stove season, and the annual release of Elias' free agent rankings is upon us. It speaks to the volume of the CBA's absurdities that we rarely appreciate just how awful this system is....
Marat Safin Says Agassi Is "Stupid", Should "Shut Up"
Tennis-playing dude Marat Safin isn't exactly broken up over revelations that fellow competitor Andre Agassi was addicted to crank. If he feels so bad about it now, Safin says, then why not give back all that money he didn't win?...
“My Coach Broke My Collarbone.” Your First Edition Of A-HOLE COACH DIGEST
I've been thinking about terrible coaches lately. Coaches that are not merely incompetent, but also paranoid, megalomaniacal, and prickish. Coaches that are praised for having such qualities, particularly at the college and high school levels....
Area Satirical Newspaper Joins Forces With Puppet-Based Humor Channel
In a move I can only pray will cut Jeff Dunham-related programming down to a more manageable 23 hours a day, The Onion and Comedy Central will be doing a sports show together....
Isiah Thomas Continues His Formula For Success
Florida International begins its march to the upper echelon of D-I basketball by playing its first exhibition game under their new head coach....and losing to an NAIA school coached by Rollie Massimino. Exactly as planned. [AP/SB/RTC]...
It Never Gets Old
So they spent more money than anyone else. So they didn't have to wait as long as anyone else. Ask us fans if it feels any less amazing. It doesn't....
Who Cares About The Meth Stuff, Agassi Wore A Wig?
Another bombshell from his biography: Agassi wore a wig, which fell apart in the shower the night before his first Grand Slam final. He prayed "not for victory, but that my hairpiece would not fall off." So there's that. [BBC]...
Andre Agassi, Tweaker
In his forthcoming autobiography, which you no longer need to purchase because you know the only interesting part, Agassi admits he regularly took crystal meth. But who didn't do drugs and hook up with Brooke Shields in the '90s? [People]...
From D1 To X-Rated?
Chase Mejia was set to play WR at Kansas State, but he may have found a career more his style. I think you can guess which career from the (very cropped) photo....
The One Where Lee Corso Takes A Massive Dump
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....
The Filipino Ron Artest Suspended One Year For Slugging Fan
Wynne "Tiny" Arboleda of the Philippine Basketball Association has been suspended for the entire 2009-10 season after he went all Daniel Plainview on a fan during a game. At least he'll have more time to work on his rap album....
George Lopez Is This Year's Frank Caliendo
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
NFL Players' Softer Sides Are Just As Dumb
Disclosure: thanks to a friend in editorial, I'm often one of the anonymous guys in the "men tell you what they really want" articles at Cosmo. That's my excuse for knowing that this month's issue features some football players....
Ball The Pretty Horses: High Schoolers Show School Spirit With Equine Double-Team T-Shirts (UPDATE)
It seems a few hairy-palmed scamps at Houston's Memorial High School recently sold the t-shirt you see here to commemorate their Mustangs' football game against archrival Stratford. Think this is the only bit of Memorial-related horsefucking? Nay!...
This Is What You Call The Hebert Salute
Former Saints quarterback Bobby Hebert let the shit-kickin' hillbilly overtake him after the Saints bullied the ball away from Captain Poise Pants to score a touchdown and put the game away....
Ford Field Pants Dropper Can Totally Explain This
As you would probably expect, when one dude is caught on camera choking out another dude who isn't wearing pants the natural response is usually, "It's not what you think!" Well, the gentleman on top has finally spoken up....
September: <em>Fin</em>.
We produce a lot of posts every month. Most of them disappear quickly. Some of them don't. Here are the 10 most popular posts from September, ranked low to high....
I Challenge You To A Whack Off
Time for your Deadspin Open Mailbag Tuesday. Email us here or submit your questions via Twitter. This week, we're covering whacking speed, haterade, rugby, peanut butter and weed crackers, and more....
Lions Fan Enjoys Historic Victory Sans Pants
Detroit fans have suffered through eons of metaphorical de-pantsings, so it's understandable that a few dudes attending Sunday's monumental victory would look to continue the tradition by literally dropping trou during a drunken game of grab-ass....