ass Page 293 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jay Mariotti On Erin Andrews, AutoSummarized
"Why was the Internet ... giving semi-lives to people with no lives?" thunders Mariotti, who writes for the Internet. The column goes on in this vein for 1,500 words. Let's send this through Microsoft Word's AutoSummarize function, shall we?...
Losman To Bring Down Overall Quality Of Play In Whole New League
The UFL finally has its marquee player. The former Bills QB finally has a starting job. Unfortunately for the both of them, those aren't unrelated statements....
What Exactly Is Ben Roethlisberger Accused Of Anyway?
Now that the people who care have had time to survey and digest the complaint against Pittsburgh's Ben Roethlisberger, a clearer picture has emerged about the accuser and her allegations and it's not pretty. Here's an attempt to summarize:...
ESPN Breaks Its Silence On Ben Roethlisberger
Fantasy Alert: Big Ben is listed as probable for Week 1 (knee, sexual assault lawsuit.) Adjust your rosters accordingly. [ESPN]...
Ben Roethlisberger Accused Of Sexual Assault
WTAE-Pittsburgh reports that a Nevada casino employee has filed a civil lawsuit against Steeler quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, accusing him of sexual assault. His attorney denies the charge. More tomorrow, obviously, when Feel Good Story Week continues. [WTAE-TV; PFT]...
Hockey Game At Fenway Park To Be Wicked Cold
Bruins officially announce that they will host the Flyers in Fenway Park for next year's Winter Classic, but they'll really have to fling it to get a puck over the Green Monster. [Herald]...
Rinku Singh, The Body Electric
Singh, Pirates farmhand and vaguely neocolonial subject, struck out the only batter he faced Monday to become what's believed to be the first India-born player to win a professional baseball game in the States. [AP]...
Deadspin Classic: A Disco Inferno
In an alternate universe, Deadspin's archives would cover the whole scope of human history. Occasionally, we like to revisit those timeless moments that we would have written about, if only we could have. Today: The night disco died....
Teammate Is Totally Undermining Lance Armstrong
Alberto Contador unexpectedly moved into second, and the Tour de France suddenly went all Brandy vs. Monica. Lance: "Things didn't really go according to the plan we mapped out before. I was a little surprised, but it doesn't matter." [AFP]...
Rick Reilly® Celebrates After Scoring Big Interview With Lance Armstrong's Ass
But before that, Rick Reilly® was apparently wandering aimlessly on a French road and this nice photographer lady picked him up. Then they went back to the hotel and slammed beers....
CBS News By Brooks
This photograph of Sahel Kazemi comes from CBS News' Crimesider blog, which promises "a rare glimpse into the slain football hero's hidden world" but in reality offers nothing but a glimpse into a dead woman's cleavage....
Deadspin Classic: Kobe Doin' <i>What?</i>
In an alternate universe, Deadspin's archives would cover the whole scope of human history. Occasionally, we like to revisit those timeless moments that we would have written about, if only we could have. Today: Kobe Bryant's Colorado Adventure....
Leading By Example, One Headbutt At A Time
Youth baseball coaches choose from an array of options in the post-game handshake line. They can: shake hands (classy), fist-bump (terroristic), feign ignorance (juvenile) or headbutt the rival coach in the face in front of minors (aggravated assault). [Star-Ledger]...
John Feinstein Has Bypass Surgery
Feinstein, author of 4,285 books and a new, now poignantly named blog, writes: "The angiogram showed 'four to six,' blockages in my heart-one of them 100 percent." He went under the knife yesterday. [Feinstein on the Brink]...
The Lightning's Draft Pick Really Does Read The Articles
Q: What's the last book you read? Viktor Hedman: "I don't want to say. The last one was Jenna Jameson, How to Make Love Like a Porn Star." Delightfully tacky, yet literately unrefined. [JoeBoltsFan]...
Someone Needs A Refund
Sir Sidney Ponson, in the midst of leading the Dutch Honkball team to the quarterfinals of the WBC, tested positive for Phentermine, a stimulant and appetite suppressant. He's also the reason we invented Deadspin widescreen. [AP]...
Mazel Tov, Omri Casspi
Casspi was selected with the 23rd pick in the Draft last night, which, in David Stern's mind, completely validates the NBA's entire push for globalization. Shalom, chaver. If Casspi — a 6-foot-9 small forward who had some success in the Euroleague — makes the NBA, he will be the first Israeli and se...
Michael Jackson Dies. Chad Johnson Says It's "Just As Sad As 9/11."
The LA Times is saying King of Pop Michael Jackson died today after suffering a heart attack. He was 50. Because this is a sports blog, here's a video, via NESW Sports, of Jackson playing one-on-one with Michael Jordan. RIP....
Deadspin Classic: The O.J. Chase
In an alternate universe, Deadspin's archives would cover the whole scope of human history. Occasionally, we like to revisit those timeless moments that we would have written about, if only we could have. Today: The 15th anniversary of "The Chase."...
College Baseball Fans Not Used To Being On TV
Mike Irwin of KFSM in Fayetteville would just like to talk about Arkansas baseball, but some slack-jawed SEC fans just can't resist a chance to be on the teevee. Get your hands off him, you damn dirty apes!...