aw Page 284 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Finally, Patrick Kane
Pushed to the edge of elimination, the Blackhawks haven’t gotten much from their best goalscorers—and the Blues have. Patrick Kane, the NHL’s regular-season points leader, hadn’t found the back of the net through the first four games. Or through three periods of last night’s game. Or in the first ov...

NBCSN Cuts Off Pat Foley's Rant About Late NHL Starts
The odd NHL postseason scheduling has resulted in some quirks, including Central time zone games reaching well into the A.M. hours—and that’s ignoring the ever-present spectre of overtime. Blackhawks analyst Pat Foley has HAD ENOUGH, and his presence on the NBCSN simulcast of Comcast SportsNet’s Chi...

Clayton Kershaw Throws Weird Pitch
Does this Clayton Kershaw pitch from today’s game even count as an eephus? It seems more like the Dodgers pitcher forgot that Tyler Flowers was already at the plate, or maybe Kershaw didn’t set himself properly on the mound and had to follow through so he didn’t hurt anything. Whatever the reason, t...

Prince's 1991 MTV Video Awards Performance Is Maybe The Sexiest Thing Ever Aired On TV
The 1991 MTV Video Music Awards marked a major turning point for the direction of music. Not only did a so-called “alternative” group (R.E.M.) sweep most of the awards, but the other nominees—ranging from Madonna’s “Like A Prayer” to Chris Isaak’s “Wicked Game”—helped stage the music promotions busi...

Conor McGregor Grabs The UFC By The Dick, Squeezes
The strangest ongoing story in sports this week has been UFC featherweight champion Conor McGregor maybe (but probably not) retiring and either dropping out or being pulled from a main event fight against Nate Diaz in July on what the UFC would like to be their biggest-ever fight card....

Can I Kick My Creepy Roommate Out Of My Apartment?
Welcome back to Ask a Lawyer, wherein I, a lawyer, respond to your questions. Got a vexing legal issue? Send it over, or drop it in the comments below....

The Lazy, Inept Amateur's Guide To Lawn Care
Some years back, my wife and I moved out of our lovely condo in a pleasant D.C. suburb and into a repurposed garage space in my mom’s little rambler, with the goal of renting out our condo and saving enough money to eventually buy some real land. And it worked! Roughly 18 months of stifling near-mis...

UFC Boss Dana White Mad At Conor McGregor For Not Doing Some Dumb Bullshit
Yesterday, UFC featherweight champion Conor McGregor may or may not have retired; it isn’t clear. What is clear is that he won’t participate in a highly-anticipated rematch against Nate Diaz on July 9, unless he does. UFC figurehead Dana White went on The Herd with smooth-skinned ghoul Colin Cowherd...
![Andrew Shaw Miraculously Remembers What He Said To Official, Apologizes [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/urysygmb5kapccrsrozg.jpg)
Andrew Shaw Miraculously Remembers What He Said To Official, Apologizes [Update]
In a stunning turn of events, Blackhawks forward Andrew Shaw now recalls what he said to an official after being called for a penalty in Tuesday’s game against the Blues. The broadcast caught Shaw in the box banging his stick against the glass and saying something that definitely looked like, “Fuck ...

Widehawks Look Terrible
We’re at the point now where the wide Mohawk haircut—clean-shaven on the sides, business at the back, party size of your choice up top—has become a staple hairstyle for athletes all over the world. But why? Why the fuck have so many athletes decided to rock extreme negburns and walk around looking l...

Harry The Hawk Crotched Himself
That ugly-ass Hawks-Celtics game was only made less painful to watch by an unfortunate pratfall from Atlanta’s mascot, who will not be fertilizing eggs anytime soon. Keep an eye on Harry’s tightrope routine at the bottom of the screen:...

Corey Crawford Lost His Mind For A Second There
I think staged fighting is hockey’s biggest joke and I’m glad it’s on its way out. But give me a goalie hulking out, in full pads, and I lose my mind like a kid who just found out it’s a snow day, or the people from this perfect tweet. So my personal highlight of last night’s very busy 4-3 Blues win...

Andrew Shaw On Apparent Video of Him Shouting Gay Slur At Official: "I Don't Know What I Said"
The Blackhawks lost Game 4 against the St. Louis Blues 4-3 this evening in Chicago, and they’re now just a game away from their Stanley Cup defense ending after one round. The Blues scored two goals early in the third period to break a 2-2 tie, and the Blackhawks lost their cool. Andrew Shaw earned ...

That Terrible Celtics-Hawks Game, In One Play
The Hawks just took a 2-0 lead in their first round series with the Boston Celtics after a prehistoric, listless game. Avery Bradley didn’t play because of a hamstring injury, Kelly Olynynk missed the game with a shoulder problem, and the Hawks’ coolest player, Dennis Schröder, turned his ankle at t...

The Celtics Just Had The Worst First Quarter In NBA Playoff History
The Atlanta Hawks were held scoreless for the last five minutes and change of the first quarter of tonight’s playoff game against Boston, but that doesn’t matter because the shamrock boys just took a world historic shit and scored only seven points over the entire first period on 3-for-23 shooting. ...

ESPN's Curt Schilling Shares Bigoted Anti-Trans Meme On His Facebook Page
ESPN baseball analyst Curt Schilling just cannot stop putting bad memes on his Facebook page. It’s only been six months since he got suspended for comparing Muslims to Nazis, but here he is with some bad and dumb thoughts (which have since been deleted) about transgender people:...

"I Have Pages," George R.R. Martin Tells Deadspin
As regular readers know, we’ve previously advanced the theory that George R.R. Martin, author of the popular A Song of Ice and Fire fantasy novels, hasn’t produced a new entry in his best-selling series in five years because he has no pages. (To put things into perspective, Martin has published one ...

The Saddest Little Leaguer
We can’t embed the video, so go watch this clip of an adult brawl at a Florida Little League game, shot from behind an immobile, heartbreakingly tiny catcher who can only look on at the carnage. Keep blocking that plate, you poor little guy....

Manhattan's DA Reminds You Upskirting Is Illegal There, And Gross Everywhere
Not every state has rules on the books making it illegal for men to covertly photograph a woman’s genital region just because she’s wearing a dress or a skirt. (I’m sure lawmakers in those states just have more faith in people’s inherent respect for women’s bodies.) But New York does. ...

Nearly Perfect: The Meteoric Rise And Fall Of The Orlando Magic
The Chicago Bulls’ path to the NBA’s then best-ever record and the first of three consecutive titles wasn’t as inevitable then as it seems now, with hindsight, and that’s in large part because of the rise and fall of the Orlando Magic....