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Dwayne Haskins caught maskless with strippers, future deservedly in jeopardy [Updated]
So apparently, Washington Football Team quarterback Dwayne Haskins likes strippers more than his career. After losing to the Seattle Seahawks on Sunday, Haskins decided to party it up — maskless — with some ladies at a local jiggle joint....
Notre Dame coach Mike Brey furiously swiping right to find new opponent to put at risk
You have to assume that Mike Brey at least made a few phone calls, sent a few texts, something, anything, before he decided to tweet in desperate search for someone to play basketball against Notre Dame next weekend....
OKC to welcome Thunder fans into their arena, which means COVID must be over, right?
In a move that defies common sense as the country sets all-time highs for daily COVID-19 infections, the Oklahoma City Thunder will allow fans in their indoor arena for the NBA season ... which starts next month....
Who’s ready for Wisconsin/Notre Dame this week & why is it even a thing?
Wisconsin has played one game this season, beating Illinois, 45-7, back on Oct. 23. Then the Badgers got coronavirus, had their game last week at Nebraska canceled, and once again won’t play this week, when they were supposed to face Purdue at Camp Randall Stadium....
Let's all say a prayer for Derek Carr as he stares at a possible all-backup O-line Sunday
Here is where the NFL is now with COVID-19. This Sunday, the Raiders’ franchise quarterback very well could be counting on an entire offensive line made up of backups....
Entire Team Quarantined in Disney’s Stupid ‘Athlete Bubble’ as More Test Positive
They’re spending Independence Day in lockdown....
Oh Great, La Liga Is Trying To Bring A Regular Season Game To Miami Again
A year ago, the dipshits in charge of Spain’s top soccer league and some dipshits on the American sports marketing scene conked their little pea-brains together and came up with a 15-year contract that would see one La Liga match played in the United States every season. Because the parties involved...
Alexi Lalas Should Think Less
Wouldn’t you know it! Alexi Lalas, the guy who said, “Damn right, I’m gonna stand,” and implied that players kneeling during the national anthem to protest racial inequality would be the same as a player wearing a MAGA hat during the national anthem, has more half-baked political takes....
Football Writers Dust Off Their Old Dumb Takes About Domestic Violence, Somehow Make Them Dumber
Since the Kansas City Chiefs indefinitely suspended Tyreek Hill last week for his alleged role in breaking his 3-year-old son’s arm and for threatening his fiancée in a leaked audio recording, the NFL Knowers have dutifully donned their thinking caps and pondered solutions. What the actual problem b...
Philippine MMA Promotion Hosts Extremely Sloppy 3-On-3 Fight
Last weekend, regional Philippine MMA promotion Universal Reality Combat Championship showcased several of the Philippines’ most promising fighters fighting the normal way, and then also six other dudes fighting three-on-three. It was not as action-packed as you might imagine....
<i>Fortnite</i> Players Immediately Find Worst Possible Uses For New NFL Skins
In an attempt to burnish their brand in the eyes of the nation’s population of shrieking nine-year-olds who steal their mothers’ credit cards to cosplay John Wick in a bad video game, the NFL has partnered with Fortnite and released a bunch of official skins and other crap. Predictably, players imme...
Jerry Jones Thinks You're Stupid Enough To Believe An 18-Game Season Would Be "Better For Players"
Roger Goodell and the NFL owners have been agitating for an expanded regular season for a number of years now. Back in 2010, Patriots owner Bob Kraft called the idea of an 18-game season “a win-win all around,” and Goodell said, “There’s a tremendous amount of momentum for it. We think it’s the righ...
New Marketing Deal Will Bring Regular Season La Liga Match To The U.S.
After years of seeing meaningful games from our own major sports shipped abroad by the greedy leagues that control them, U.S. sports fans are about to find themselves on the opposite side of that transaction. Thanks to a new marketing deal, Spain’s La Liga will play a regular season match stateside,...
The McGregor-Mayweather Fight Will Be Dumb As Dogshit
After what feels like years of chest-puffing and across-the-aisle shit talking, Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather have finally agreed to fight each other for what will undoubtedly be a huge pile of money. The fight will take place in Las Vegas on August 26. It will be a 12-round bout at 154 pounds...
Reds Prospect Posts Video Of Himself Snorting What Appears To Be Cocaine
Cincinnati Reds pitching prospect Ian Kahaloa was drafted in the fifth round of the 2015 amateur draft, and has been playing rookie ball ever since. He won’t be playing much this year, though, as he’s currently serving a 50-game drug suspension that was handed down on Tuesday. Last month, a Twitter ...
Oh, Cool, The NFL Is Trying To Kill One More Vestige Of Weirdness
The NFL’s determination to erase fun from its sport isn’t limited to its staid distribution of training videos for touchdown dances. The Washington Post and ESPN have reported that the league’s competition committee is also set to consider a proposal to ban leaping over the line of scrimmage on extr...
NFL Developing New Way To Drain All Joy From Sport For No Reason
The NFL will develop “an educational training video” on how to celebrate a fucking touchdown, according to a tweet this morning by executive vice president of football operations Troy Vincent, who if this was not the most embarrassing thing he has ever announced in public has had an extremely awful ...
You Are About To Be One Dumb Accident Away From Bankruptcy, If You Aren't Already
There are some nights when it keeps me up in a panicked haze. What if I get hit by a car while I’m running? What if I take a spill on my bike and tear some ligaments or, worse, have to take an ambulance to the hospital from some far flung road outside the city where I live? An x-ray? I’m eating lent...
The "Blue State Secession" Thing Is Not Helping
Ever since the election of Donald Trump, we have been treated to periodic semi-serious think pieces by liberals saying that blue states should form their own country. Hey—shut the fuck up!!...
Totally Unsurprising Development: Russell Okung's Self-Negotiated Contract Didn't Pay Off
Offensive tackle Russell Okung, who signed with the Broncos last offseason, is now a free agent. This is unsurprising, because despite the fact that Okung had a five-year “contract” with the Broncos that was “worth” $53 million, the Broncos faced no financial penalties for cutting him....