bad Page 133 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Joakim Noah Is Already Making Friends
Of all the funny love connections that came out of last night's NBA Draft, the one we were most tickled by was the match of Joakim Noah and the Chicago Bulls. Seriously. Look at that guy. He looks like that before comes into the sanitarium that is the NBA. In six years, he's going to have physically...

The Stephen A. Smith Hecklers Return!
We had been told The Stephen A. Smith Heckling Society Of Gentlemen would not be at the NBA Draft this year. We were wrong; oh, how we were....

Look! NBA Draft Analysis!
Obviously, the Internets are gonna be buzzing all day today with draft analysis and all that dirty business, and everyone's gonna be telling you who the winners and losers were after a night where nothing other than the reading of names happened....

NBA Draft Live Blog: Free Darko Is Here
Some sad news, folks: The world-famous Stephen A. Smith Heckling Society Of Gentlemen, responsible for the brilliant SAS draft night heckling video, turned out to be unable to garner tickets to tonight's NBA Draft. This is going to severely diminish the amount of fun we're going to have tomorrow. (S...

Come "Party" With Daequan Cook
According to the most recent — and, we presume, the final — NBADraft.net projection — Ohio State guard Daequan Cook is slated to be drafted tonight with the 22nd pick by the Charlotte Bobcats. We hope it works out for him, because he's hosting a party tonight, and it's totally gonna be embarrassing ...

Just to make sure that all the bases are covered before draft time, Best Week Ever presents its Kevin Garnett megadeal scenario. It naturally includes a deal in which the Knicks trade every single first round pick they own for the rest of eternity in exchange for Juwan Howard, Ray Allen, Mike Bibby,...

Getting Drunk With The Draft And Simmons
As we watch Chad Ford do his absolute best Bill Simmons impression while mock-drafting with the Sports Fella — "Taking Oden is like marrying the girl you don't want to date, but the girl you want to spend the rest of your life with!" — we look forward to tomorrow night's NBA Draft. (Which will be li...

Remembering Stephen A. Smith's Night Of NBA Draft Glory
To remind: The NBA Draft is three days away. To make sure you're appropriately fired up, we bring you this brilliant blast from the past, the fantastic Stephen A. Smith heckling video from last year's NBA Draft. HE LOVES THESE CHEESY DOODLES....

When Rod Beck Ruled The World
There's still no official word on what caused the death of former Major League pitcher Rod Beck, found in his Phoenix home on Sunday at the age of 38. Beck, of course, was one of baseball's great relievers for a stretch in the 1990s, in addition to being one of sports' great guys. For every fan, jou...

China Insists That Boston And Philly Are Grand Places For The Chinese
The NBA Draft is now just three days away, and since everybody knows how the first two picks are going down, the main intrigue — other than the usual sartorial speculation — involves the three Florida players and Chinese mystery Yi Jianlian. He's either Dirk Nowitzki or Wang Zhi-Zhi, and he's either...

Cow Tipping In Madison Is Absolutely Unacceptable
Sometimes, considering our own background, we have a hard time understanding some of these newfangled athlete malfeasances. This "Making It Rain" ... that didn't come up much in Mattoon (though the crops sure could have used it!)...

Enjoy Your Night Of Watching Other People Be Drafted
This young man is Kendaris Pelton, a part-time player for Mississippi State Southern Mississippi. And by part-time, we mean that he played in seven games. And he has declared for the NBA Draft....

Well, We Suppose This Ruins Pitino's Master Plan
Yes, friends, it is a sad day in Celtics land. (It's a sad day in Grizzlies land too, but nobody cares about the Grizzlies.) All the hopes and dreams of Bill Simmons — who should have plenty to write about over the next five years — and those Golden Tee-playing Boston fans went up in a poof of lotte...

Yet Another Great Reason To Live In Portland
Before we talk about the disappointment of all the teams who didn't win the first or second pick in last night's NBA Draft Lottery, let's look at the team that did win, the Portland Trail Blazers. (The official favorite team of Henry Abbott at True Hoop, who was at the lottery last night and, amusin...

Live Blogging The Recitation Of Team Names
It's rare that the landscape of the NBA can change so dramatically in one night, but tonight it definitely one of those nights. Fittingly, it has nothing to do with an increasingly meandering playoffs....

Time For The Drama Of Postage Being Opened
Tonight's the NBA Draft Lottery, which, if you've watched the last half of the season, you know is the most important night of the past 365 days for half the teams in the league. Which is depressing, but whatever....

That's Not How Personal Training Typically Works
The Arena Football League is full of happy success stories. Kurt Warner. That weird video game that's oddly fun to play. Jon Bon Jovi. And now, to add to the list, the high school coaching adventures of Tom Porras, a former AFL quarterback. He was fired last week as track coach (and "personal traine...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch when you're feeling extra religious ... • NBA: Conference semifinals, New Jersey at Cleveland, Game 2; San Antonio at Phoenix, Game 2. Oh, come on and watch; sleep is overrated. [TNT] • MLB: Rangers at Yankees. Let's talk about Clemens some more! [YES Network] • ISKA kickboxing. Real m...

Brian Urlacher Deplenished Of $100 Grand Worth Of Fluid
OK, so we'll say it: We don't find Gatorade the slightest bit replenishing. We think it mostly tastes like urine distilled through a coffee machine, but that's less to the point; when we work out, the last thing we want is a sugary thick beverage. We're working out to lose calories; why would we wan...