ball Page 1598 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Quarterback Fudge Van Hooser Commits To Tulane, Becomes An Early Name Of The Year Favorite
Tulane received an oral commitment today from an Montgomery, Ala., quarterback named Fudge Van Hooser today. We can only hope that a few years down the road Fudge gets drafted by the Pa...nthers. Here's a video of him running track. [NewOrleans.com]...
And Now, An Appreciation Of The Bra
I went to the doctor the other day. I was sentenced to wait in one of the examination rooms for roughly 90 minutes while the doctor played CALL OF DUTY in the next room over under the guise of supposedly saving other people's lives, or some bullshit like that. Anyway, they had the reflex tester layi...
Congress Hammers Out Differences On Baseball Diamond (Video)
When all was said — like, "It's one of the best things we do in Congress"*— the Dems had prevailed 13-5. They'd knocked around Rep. John Shimkus (R-Ill.) — still, on the field — during the fifth inning, which is a fitting fate for the man that kinda-sorta tried to hide the whole Mark Foley-emailing-...
Basketball Players In Asia Are Punching Each Other Again
Here's Mark "Macmac" Cardona of the Talk 'N Text Tropang Texters punching former Cincinnati Bearcat Ronald Allen of the Dongguan Leopards. Described in Pacific Rims as "a pitbull," Macmac doesn't hesitate taking on the taller American. Two makes a trend, right? [PBA-Online]...
First 150 Fans To Have Seizures Get A Free Hot Dog!
The Hudson Valley Renegades have an interesting sponsor for fireworks night. Comedy pyramid? Comedy pyramid. Do work, people. (H/T William M.)...
What Has Two Middle Fingers And Loves College Baseball?
Because no one reads the newspaper and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
How Many Famous People Are There On Earth?
Robert Byrd died today. You can check his scrawny old ass off you death pool now. And if anyone ever kept a death pool, the list of candidates could now go on for miles....
Here's The Lego Version Of USA-Ghana You've Been Dreading
Relive the pain and the feelings of national indignity with this Lego version of Saturday's defeat. All that's missing? Little Lego beer bottles being thrown across little Lego living rooms in a little Lego version of America. [Lego Fussball]...
Cops Will Always Be Bastards. GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Stephen Strasburg Saves The Collectible Crap Industry
Stephen Strasburg already has an autographed Washington Nationals baseball card somehow, although I'm going to guess the $1 jillion eBay offer is not a "serious" bid. It's easily worth twice that! [eBay]...
The Fine Art Of Addressing Your Children’s Genitals
It's a blockbuster funbag today. We go right to your letters....
Riot Cops Slightly Underdressed For Soccer Match
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
PING! It's College World Series Time!
Actually, it has been for several days already, but by request, here's a CWS open thread. No. 1 Arizona State got bounced today and Oklahoma plays Clemson in the nightcap. No offense, but I'm watching "The Two Escobars." [AP Photo]...
What’s The Best Way To Avoid Being Raped In Prison?
I was told by friend this weekend that it's a long-held bit of conventional wisdom that Asian women have, on average, warmer genitals than other women. I did not know this was a supposedly universal stereotype for dragon ladies, nor did anyone else in my company. We all knew the usual stereotypes ab...
Going By "Kurt": The Most Interesting Thing Mark Teixeira Has Ever Done
Distraught over the suicide of Kurt Cobain, a young Mark Teixeira went by "Kurt" for a while, according to an interview with MLB Network. This was, of course, prior to being replaced by a switch-hitting automaton. [Walk Off Walk, photo via]...
Crucial Relationship Advice Spoken Drunkenly To Teenagers: Cheat On All Your Girlfriends
I went to a bachelor party this weekend in a seaside town. There was eating, and drinking, and a failed attempt to get two Polish Food Lion clerkettes to come over and massage the groom....
Come To Steve Smith's Football Camp For Kids — Where You Can Learn To Injure A Star
The Panthers WR broke his arm while horsing around at his football camp. No, it wasn't on this high-five, but it was almost as embarrassing....
Don't Let Notre Dame Touch You There, Big Ten
So Lou Holtz finally wants Notre Dame in The Big 10. I never took him for a bandwagoner, but his assessment that the conferences are eventually going to split into a few mega-conferences isn't lacking for evidence....
Cockblocked By The Bassist’s Poop! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....