ball Page 1855 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Goodnight, Sweet Knights
Before anyone becomes too caught up in the Who Will Ohio State Play In The BCS Title Game? talk, let's take a moment to lament the end of college football's best storyline, the Rutgers Scarlet Knights, who laid an egg against Cincinnati, losing 30-11 and ending any (probably fanciful anyway) dream...
Look, The Cubs Actually Spent Some Cash. A LOT Of It
Say what you will about the Chicago Cubs, but they aren't letting a little thing like an impending sale stand in the way of paying a ridiculous amount for a big name. In a move that should put those A-Rod rumors to the crematorium, the Cubs signed Alfonso Soriano to an eight-year, $136 million dea...
Dodgers Release Crack Smuggling Minor Leaguer
Kengshill Scheider Pujols is a minor league pitcher with the Vero Beach Dodgers, and the man stuffed 118 bags of crack cocaine into his underwear. The unfortunate thing about it is that he didn't even wait for "Stuff Bags of Crack-Cocaine in Your Underwear" night at Vero Beach, and almost certainly ...
Taking Down The Field Goal Posts: Thanks Anyway, Rutgers
Well, that was one of the better Cinderella stories in recent years. Unfortunately, it had to end sooner or later... and perhaps its less painful to be crushed by Cincinnati now than to be denied a shot at a national championship despite an undefeated season. Rutgers lost—nay, got hammered—in Cinc...
Hugh Johnson Update: Bonus Edition
And somewhere, Maurice Clarett asks his cellmate to get off him for a second, so he can check out the final score and smile....
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 4
I swear I just saw Maurice Clarett putting down that new sod as part of a work release program. - VanillaThrilla6...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 3
Inappropriate conversation of the moment (and words I may be eating later): Friend1: I'm not worried about this Bo thing. Troy Smith does not respect your dead elders! Friend 2: Troy Smith feasts on your tears! - Leebert1981...
Bo's Had Enough Time To Get Settled In By Now, So Let's Do This
That'll just about do it for the masturbation. It's time to get at it. Kickoff's in just a few minutes, and I honestly don't feel overwhelmed by the hype. The game is big enough that a week of ESPN-brand hype wasn't enough to kill it for me—and that doesn't happen often. Give Brent Musberger a few m...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 2
He doesn't diddle Brady Quinn's sister, but Paul Poslunzy is earning my respect, he is much better than AJ Hawk. For the sake of comparison let's hope that he's all over Chad Henne's sister. - John L. Smith's back-hand slap...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 1
Corso's Gameday Math: Rutgers loses to the 'Ville by 51 last year + Wins by 3 this year = 48 point turnaround. Oh that Corso sure is a master of mathematics... 51+3=48, Incredible. - Ian, Lexington, KY...
The Dead Dead Schembechlers
It was a phenomenal little ride while it lasted, but the Dead Schembechlers are no more. The punk band announced last night that their performance at the Hate Beat Michigan rally would be their last. They also elected to give all proceeds from their final show to a charity of the Schembechler family...
Five Tiny Tidbits On: The Ivy League
Thought we were done previewing things? How could you think that, with your NCAA Basketball Tournament office pool a mere five months away? You've got to start studying now if you want to earn that down payment for a high-def TV. So who's with me? Let's Gooo! Please send contributions to tips@dead...
Meow Meow Meow Meow
Every Day Should Be Saturday, whose daily brilliance might be what we'll miss most about college football once it's gone, directs us to this clip from last night's West Virginia-Pittsburgh game, in which quarterback Pat White does his best impersonation of Halle Berry in Catwoman. It's one thing to ...
Schembechler Dead at 77
Some scary news out of Detroit: Former Michigan coach Bo Schembechler is listed in critical condition after collapsing with an undisclosed ailment this morning. Radio stations in the area have reported that Schembechler had just filmed a game promo for a local ABC affiliate when he collapsed....
Valenti's Great Leap Forward
You might remember the great, mad meltdown of Michigan State Spartans broadcaster Mike Valenti after his team lost to Notre Dame earlier this year. Well, The Wizard Of Odds has found a YouTube of Valenti's demented rant set to music and Spartans football "highlights." Not only is it wonderful to rev...
Five Little Words That Started It All
As every schoolchild knows by heart, Nov. 19, 2004 was the date of the Malice in the Palace NBA brawl between the Detroit Pistons and Indiana Pacers. That of course is the fight in which the Pacers' Ron Artest went into the stands to tangle with fans, one of whom he thought had thrown a beverage a...
Just Two More Days Until Mayhem Reigns
Time to wrap up today with a little game you might have heard about. We were scooped dramatically by ESPN on the Dead Schembechlers, but we will still try to keep up....
Five Tiny Tidbits On: The West Coast Conference
Thought we were done previewing things? How could you think that, with your NCAA Basketball Tournament office pool a mere five months away? You've got to start studying now if you want to make them all sorry they laughed. So who's with me? Let's Gooo! Please send contributions to [email protected]...
Kansas Upset Allows Opponents To Live A Little Longer
Rarely does the opportunity present itself for us to write about Oral Roberts around here, and when it involves a victory over the toupeed and suddenly under-fire Bill Self, it's too much for us to resist....