baseball Page 418 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Your All-Star Game Live Blog, Ya'll
We run this picture, not because there's any particular reason to run it, but because it's the All-Star Game tonight, and we will never, ever tire of looking at this picture. It has been five years since the ultimate Bud Selig befuddled moment — honestly, just look at that picture again; doesn't it ...
The Definitive Way To Fix The Home Run Derby
In lieu of the whole discussion on how to improve the Home Run Derby, our friends at The Nosebleeds have a proposal that we can absolutely get behind....
Worry Not, Everybody: You'll Be Seeing Plenty Of Bud Selig
We know that you, like us, have been on your proverbial pins and your proverbial needles wondering whether or not baseball commissioner Bud Selig would attend the game in which Barry Bonds destroys our collective faith in humanity by breaking Hank Aaron's home run record. Wonder no longer!...
Back ... Back ... Oh, Forget It
The best description of last night's Home Run Derby — won by Vladimir Guerrero, shown here with a friend who's a tad too excited about the whole business — was in the comments this morning: "Why does an event that has 8 participants require 9 people to cover it?" This made a certain mad sense to us....
Prepare For The Brain Explosion That Is The Home Run Derby
We know we got yelled at just this morning for recycling — consider the "Year Ago In Deadspin" feature toast — but it's Home Run Derby, and that means just one thing: It's the day Chris Berman lives for, and the day the rest of us pray for a quick, merciful death. (Last year, we actually watched si...
Dan Shaughnessy Needs Your Help!
A couple of months ago, everybody's favorite Curly Haired Boyfriend — credit to Simmons: No nasty emails please, Bill! — Boston Globe columnist Dan Shaughnessy release a memoir about his son's senior year of high school baseball. Whatever your thoughts on this — and we suspect you have some — the bo...
Dane Cook Is The Face Of Postseason Baseball
If you're Major League Baseball, you have a veritable cornucopia of options of whom you should choose to serve as your postseason spokesperson. You could use Tommy Lasorda, like last year, though there's always the dangerous possibility he could ask Joe Buck to show off his swirly move. You could us...
The Wind Was Angry That Day, My Friends
"Help! The infield tarp has got me!" If you heard those words, what would you do? The host Colorado Rockies cowered in their dugout, but the Phillies' Shane Victorino is made of stronger stuff. Hearing the panicky cries of Rockies groundskeeper Keros Johnson, who was trapped in the middle of a wind-...
Do NOT ... Go In There. WOOO!
It's perfectly acceptable to vent frustration after a lousy inning of relief pitching. (Fernando Rodney does it all the time.) But here's a lesson to all those up-and-coming pitchers: if you plan to exact physical damage in the dugout bathroom after such an outing, make sure you have an escape route...
Felix Hernandez Informed By Internet That He Has Other Pitches Besides Fastball
All right, I initially highlighted the mischievousness of sports blogs to preface you all with some of the goodness sportsbloggery can achieve in life. The blog U.S.S. Mariner wrote an open letter to Seattle Mariners pitching coach Rafael Chavez, wherein he mentions how Felix Hernandez throws way to...
They Were The Games That Never End, Yes They Went On And On My Friend
Omigod, We're Gonna Be Here Forever. It's now time to discuss universal differences between men and their girlfriends regarding extra innings. When the game spills into the 10th inning, guys are usually excited that they are watching extra baseball for free. The girlfriends, meanwhile, are just tick...
A Bug's Life, If That Bug Is Named John Holmes
The world has long pined for the answer to life's perpetual mystery: Is a Rangers-Orioles game more boring than watching flies screw? Well, an astute reader and his friend attended such a baseball game last night, and saw two horseflies gettin' down and procreating. Judging by these two fans' fixat...
One More Pittsburgh Pirates Fan Will Stake A Walkout
Earlier this year, Kevin McClatchy released the chair of Pittsburgh Pirates majority owner from his grasp. Since he was on a roll, yesterday he announced he will let go of another cherished title at the end of the year: CEO. Hey, if you love something, let it go. If it finally earns a winning season...
Maybe it's because Eric Byrnes is just too IN YOUR FACE for the studio. Maybe Fox Sports is afraid his energy and enthusiasm could, at any given moment, blow away Jeanne Zelasko's carbon-fiber wig. Either way, the Arizona Diamondbacks centerfielder, who plays analyst when his team no longer plays ba...
It's A Football Score! Get It?
Guys, We Were Closer When We Gave Up 20 Runs. Go ahead. Make the joke. "It's a football score!" Haw haw haw! Because, see, 20-14 is the kind of final score you might see in an NFL game. But you never hear the joke "Wow, maybe they were playing lacrosse!" Or, "Golly, looks like he should have hit on ...
The Kansas City T-Bones Will Bag You A Possum
What's coming up in the world of minor league baseball ... we proudly give you Rick Chandler's Minor Enterprise!...
The Orem Owlz Medium Is The Message
For years, we have watched the totalitarian media/mind control tactics of the rookie-level Pioneer League team the Orem Owlz with a wary eye. They have sat there, in their megalomaniacal castle in Utah, acting as if they are the rulers of all the survey, wielding their power indiscriminately and wit...