black Page 18 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

These NFL Coaches Sucked Enough To Get Fired This Year
Hue Jackson and Mike McCarthy were horrible enough to get canned during the regular season, but now that Week 17's wrapped up, it’s time for all the other disappointing NFL head coaches to join them in the Great Coordinator Gig in the Sky. Here’s a brief roundup of everyone who’s been canned today....

Army's Beatdown Of Houston Reached The "Punt From The Black Knights' 30" Stage
The Houston Cougars were thoroughly spanked by the Army Black Knights in the Armed Forces Bowl. While some coaches would want their players to play hard through the final whistle of the game—despite being down well over 40 points—Houston coach Major Applewhite raised the white flag early in the seco...

Oh No, Corey Crawford Has Another Concussion
What has been a nightmare season for the Blackhawks has the potential to get a lot worse. Goaltender Corey Crawford, who missed nearly 10 months recovering from a concussion suffered almost exactly one year ago, was concussed again in Sunday night’s 7-3 loss to the Sharks....

Blackhawks Mascot Gets Into A Wrestling Match With A Fan
Fighting a mascot is a bad idea—mascot’s advantages: padding, potential athleticism, people care about it more than you—and it becomes an even worse idea when the cameras are rolling. The Chicago Blackhawks’ Tommy Hawk scuffled with a fan after Friday night’s game, and he handled himself well....

The Barstool Sports Gang Had A Blackface Whoopsie
Look, if a white guy and two of his black friends are going to dress up as the Celtics’ Big Three for Halloween, how will anyone know he’s Kevin Garnett—you know, aside from the name on the jersey and general context—unless he puts on blackface?...

Normal Man Donald Trump Hilariously Fucks Up Army-Navy Coin Toss
There are many compelling reasons why a reasonable person might not want to be President of the United States. The hours and stress and travel are crushing, because the broader responsibility of the job is so crushing. What a president can or cannot actually do to alter the broader course of things...

Officials At Army-Navy Needed 8 Minutes To Review A 2-Yard Run
The Army Black Knights held a 10-0 lead against their bitter rivals, the Navy Midshipmen, heading into the fourth quarter of the 119th game between the two academies. Faced with a fourth-and-two situation, and having used the break between quarters to mull things over, Army coach Jeff Monken elected...

Suit: Ex-MSU Staffer Says He Didn't Try Covering Up Sexual Assault, Was "Mentoring Student Athletes"
A former Michigan State football employee whose contract wasn’t renewed after police said he investigated a sexual assault complaint made against several football players without reporting it is suing the university. In his lawsuit, filed on Monday, Curtis Blackwell says that Michigan State ended hi...

Zion Williamson Spent Veterans Day Disrespecting The Troops
Veterans Day is a holiday meant to honor the veterans of this nation’s armed forces and the sacrifices they make. However, when entering the paint against Zion Williamson, this holiday gets brought to a momentary halt—you need to get that weak shit out of here, regardless of your status in the armed...

Army Idiots Pranked Air Force By Jamming Their Live Mascots Into Crates
Before last Saturday’s Air Force-Army college football game, two dopey West Point cadets decided to prank their rivals by stealing their live mascots, which are falcons. Not knowing how to take care of an animal, these Army morons crammed the two birds into crates. It’s so unlike the military to use...

Blackhawks Fire Joel Quenneville, For Some Reason
My headline is slightly glib, because Joel Quenneville—the second-winningest coach in NHL history—was fired for the same reason every coach is fired: the Blackhawks just aren’t very good. But the thing is, it’s really not Quenneville’s fault at all....

Are The NHL's Mini-Dynasties Dead?
Until the Capitals broke through to win their first Cup, the Penguins, Blackhawks, and Kings dominated the NHL as the most effective triumvirate since Roman times. Instead of ending with stabbings and civil war, the modern NHL version collapsed for more mundane reasons involving salary caps and agin...

New Zealand Rugby Player's Family Performs Haka For Him After He Makes His Debut
A lot of athletes have their parents in the stands for their games, but how many get a haka performed for them? New Zealand rugby union player Te Toiroa Tahuriorangi made his debut for the All Blacks in Saturday’s 46-24 win over Argentina, and his father, father-in-law, and partner treated him to a ...

Lights Go Out On Diamondbacks Game, Pedro Gomez Briefly Blames Rampaging Baboon
Top of the sixth, tie game, men on second and third, and the lights went out in Phoenix:...

18-Year-Old University Of Maine Freshman Football Player Dies After Collapsing During Preseason Workout
Darius Minor, an 18-year-old freshman defensive back on the University of Maine football team, died Tuesday during a preseason workout, per a report on the university’s website:...

Rockies Extend Vivacious, Pure, Witty, Suave, Athletic, Cordial, Bearded Strategist<em></em>
The Rockies have extended leadoff hitter Charlie Blackmon with a six-year deal, ensuring that at least one part of the team’s core will be around for the long haul. Blackmon, who was drafted by the club in 2008 and has been with them since, was otherwise set to become a free agent this winter. He wo...

Give Scott Foster The Vezina
The Blues have dressed an emergency goaltender this season, and the Hurricanes actually put their equipment manager Jorge Alves in a game last year—for precisely eight seconds with no shots on goal. Thursday night, Scott Foster not only became the first emergency goalie to make a save in an NHL game...

Blackhawks Play 36-Year-Old Local Accountant As Emergency Goalie
“I am an accounting professional with experience in financial services. I have expertise in fund accounting and financial reporting.”...

I Blame Chris Brown
Here are just a few, tiny things that happened in a dark, bizarre, depressing Year of our Lord 2018:...

How Not To Write About Movies
Black Panther is the biggest hit of 2018 and stands poised to become one of the five highest grossing movies in the history of this continent. It’s a rare movie that serves as both an artistic and financial success and has absolutely destroyed any preconceived boardroom notions about a movie with a ...