black Page 47 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Patrick Kane Reminds You Why You Should Never Take A Cab Ride In Buffalo
The Blackhawks winger was charged with two counts of felony second-degree robbery and the always popular "criminal mischief" after punching a cab driver and stealing his money. Hey, when you grow up in Buffalo 20 cents is worth the effort....

Hockey Arrests! Aww, Just Like A Real Sport
Blackhawks star Patrick Kane was arrested this morning for punching a cabbie who didn't have the 20 cents in change he wanted. So that's assault, robbery, and I'm going to assume underage drinking charges for the 20-year-old. [Buffalo News]...

Josh Hamilton Clears The Air, His Conscience And Pleads "Human"
Thanks to Kevin at Big League Stew for his amazing Twitter updates from the Hamilton press conference, attended by Yahoo's(!) Jeff Passan....

NHL's Horrible CBA Comes Back To Bite Them In The Ass
After years of the NHL screwing fans, a few owners are now trying to screw the league. No one weeps for Gary Bettman, because turnabout is foul play....

Dr. James Andrews Giveth and Taketh Away
Orthopedic Hall of Famer Dr. James Andrews has saved the careers of countless athletes with his special brand of ligament justice, but occasionally he makes an oops and cripples healthy people for the rest of their lives. No one's perfect....

How To Deal With A Day Without Sports
It's Black Wednesday, the one day on the calendar with no professional sports going on (the WNBA is offering four games tonight). How is the sports media coping with the empirically slowest news day of the year?...

Blackhawks GM Fired For Not Following Example Set By Cubs
Dale Tallon took over a terrible post-lockout Blackhawks franchise, combined shrewd drafting and solid free agent picks to build a young, exciting contender and was rewarded for his efforts with a swift kick in the pants. That's the Chicago way....

Chicago Blackhawks To Lose The Next 12 Stanley Cup Finals
Marian Hossa (who is 30) just signed a 12-year contract with the Chicago Blackhawks, after allegedly turning down a 10-year deal from the Red Wings. This guy really knows how not to pick 'em. [NHL.com]...

Jesus Christ Football Star
How you feel about this account of football-playing home-schoolers will depend largely on your stomach for misspelled signage and sentences like, "Tebow ... demonstrated that a home-schooler could absorb a playbook as well as the Book of Deuteronomy." [NYT]...

The U.S. Open At Bethpage Black, Sponsored By Happy Gilmore
The New York galleries are so lively, we've heard all week. They're great for golf, and the players love it! Turns out, it's all just a euphemism for "New Yorkers like to get tanked and heckle Tiger Woods."...

Let's All Jump Into Puddles
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Barnes Bears Down At Bethpage
Former US Amateur champion and University of Arizona star Ricky Barnes set the 36 hole US Open scoring record at -8 following the second round 65 he completed in this morning's favorable conditions....

It's U.S. Open Week And Everyone Needs Takeouts, So...
...let's write about how hard putting is. That hacker on your local muni, the one with the yips? Not so different from the winner at Bethpage Black, if they ever play. They worry about words like joule, though. [WSJ]...

The U.S. Open Is Open For Business
You were probably hoping that following the U.S. Open online would be a nice distraction from work today, but they just suspended play due to heavy rain. Hey, who wants to hear Tiger Woods cuss on teevee?...

<em>Sports Illustrated South Africa</em>'s Quirky New Ad Campaign: Black Panthers, Hitler
It can't be easy marketing an American-style sports magazine in a country only 15 years removed from apartheid, which is probably why Sports Illustrated South Africa feels the need to give the hard sell now. By which I mean, Hitler....

Michael Jordan Loves Chicago Almost As Much As He Loves Nike
An animatronic Jordan doll donned a Blackhawks jersey at the United Center this weekend, to show his support for the "hometown" boys—but not before he had team officials sew a red patch over the Reebok logo. Nothing to see here, Mr. Knight! [Puck Daddy]...

Adam Burish Survives Horrifying Decapitation Attempt
The Blackhawks lost Game One of the Western Conference Finals yesterday, but Burish's head is still attached to the rest of his body so I guess he has that going for him. Teammate Ben Eager got tangled up with a Red Wing player in the second period and his foot—you know the one with the freshly shar...

Red Hawks. Black Wings. Open Thread.
Puckheads...enjoy. [Yahoo Sports]...

Tim Brown Would Like To Clarify That Whole 'Al Davis Hates Blacks From Notre Dame' Thing
By now, you've probably heard what Tim Brown told WCNN radio in Atlanta, which was basically that Al Davis finds black athletes from Notre Dame to be a tad, oh what's the word, uppity....