bo Page 487 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rejoice! Alonzo Mourning Says "Who Wants To Sex Mutombo?" Happened!
Today is a great day! It's been almost a year since Dikembe Mutombo went on Highly Questionable and shot down one of the greatest urban legends in sports, denying that he ever walked into a club and shouted, "Who wants to sex Mutombo?" Today, those of us who have held on to the hope that Mutombo was...

Rex Ryan, Please Stop Body-Shaming Your Beautiful Brother
According to Fox Sports' Mike Garafolo, Buffalo Bills head coach Rex Ryan was talking some mess about the appearance of his brother, Saints defensive coordinator Rob Ryan....

Nikola Mirotic Is Balling
Bulls rookie forward Nikola Mirotic went for 28 points and eight rebounds in a win against the Hornets last night, a performance that he punctuated by banking one on Jason Maxiell's head. Mirotic's minutes have been fluctuating like crazy throughout the season, but Tom Thibodeau is finally starting ...

Bob Huggins's Daughters Call Dez Wells A Rapist
Maryland guard Dez Wells was kicked off the Xavier men's basketball team in 2012 after being accused of sexual assault. An Ohio grand jury ultimately decided not to bring charges against Wells, and he later settled a lawsuit filed against Xavier. It's something he still hears about from opposing fan...

Towel Boy Fall Down Go Boom
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Marcus Smart Ejected After Punching Matt Bonner In The Balls
Celtics fans are hoping Marcus Smart is the next Kevin Garnett, and if this blast to Matt Bonner's nuts is any proof, the rookie is already embracing some of KG's finishing moves. This one, in particular, finished Smart's night; he earned the ejection, and Boston fell 101-89 to the Spurs....

Maybe It'll Get Stuck That Way
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Colin Cowherd Loves Oregon Because Of All The Wonderful White People
On his radio show today, butt-faced shitbag Colin Cowherd dropped the dog whistle for once while yakking his way through a segment in which he seeded all of the states in order of how much he likes them. Cowherd really, really likes Oregon. Can you guess why? (It's partly because there are a lot of ...

Dallas Mayor Calls Greg Hardy Signing A "Shot In The Gut"
Dallas Mayor Mike Rawlings sat down for an interview with local reporters to talk about the Cowboys' decision to sign Greg Hardy, who was accused of choking and beating his girlfriend last May. Rawlings has been very outspoken about domestic violence prevention during his tenure, and he does not s...

This Is The Best Beer From Boston's Other Brewing Behemoth
You know how the adage that you should always "just be yourself" is nothing but soft-headed, recklessly empowering drivel unless all concerned parties understand the unspoken addendum of "I mean, unless you're a dick—in that case, be someone else"? The blogatorial version is that one ought to "write...

Bonk!
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Cincy's Octavius Ellis Ejected For Forearm Shiver, Cries As He Leaves
Cincinnati is locked in a tight battle with Purdue for the right to play (presumably) Kentucky in the next round, but their task just got a lot harder after forward Octavius Ellis was given a flagrant two and ejected for the forearm shiver above. He seemed to regret his excessively violent boxing ou...

Red Stripe: Rightfully Beloved In Kingston And Cambridge Alike
If you live in the Northeastern United States, you need to move, because tomorrow's the first day of spring, and it's going to snow. Believe me, I'm just as tired of whining about the weather as you are of listening to me whine about the weather, but it's been so relentlessly abominable that I can...

Life Ain't Easy For A Basketball Player Named Fuck
That up there is a real headline, in a real newspaper, on a real story about a real basketball player named Guilherme Crabogiale Fuck....

If You Like White People, Root For Lafayette
The Lafayette Leopards have been to the NCAA tournament three times; they have never won a game. They probably won't get their first victory tonight against Villanova—6:50 p.m. on TBS!—since a No. 16 seed has never beaten a No. 1 seed in the tournament. However, we still want to take a minute and re...

Dallas Sportscaster Blasts The Cowboys For Signing Greg Hardy
The last time we checked in with Dallas sportscaster Dale Hansen, he was ripping into the football establishment for suggesting that Michael Sam would make things "uncomfortable" in the NFL. With the Cowboys having signed Greg Hardy—whose then-girlfriend Nicole Holder testified that Hardy strangle...

Dayton Advances To The Round Of 64 On Sketchy No-Call At Home
Dayton beat Boise State 56-55 tonight to advance to the first round proper of the NCAA tournament, but Boise State and their fans will spend the next couple of weeks believing they were jobbed. Boise State's Derrick Marks saw his last second three-point attempt miss badly, but he'll argue that he ...

The Cowboys Will Basically Pay Greg Hardy Per Game
Defensive lineman Greg Hardy, whose domestic abuse charges were dismissed in February after his accuser didn't show up to court, signed a one-year deal with the Dallas Cowboys today that can reach up to $13.1 million if all incentives are reached....

Holy Mother Carlos Tevez Just Bombed Germany With This Rocket Golazo
Juventus and Borussia Dortmund are playing today, right now. A few minutes ago, they kicked off. Then two minutes passed. Then Juventus's Carlos Tevez got the ball. Then he blew up Germany's hopes, and also Germany. No more high-quality vehicles for anyone. Because there's no more Germany. Germany's...