bo Page 824 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jenn Brown's Halloween Costume Just Made Me Commit A Personal Foul In My Pants
Jenn Brown is making it known that she is an up-and-comer in the Hottie Sports Reporter Pantheon. I haven't been this excited about black and white stripes since I ran into the Hamburglar at a McDonald's in Jersey. [Busted Coverage]...

A-Rod News From The 'You Can't Make This Stuff Up' Department...
Like I do every day, when I want a dose of hard-hitting sports news, I turn to US Weekly. The periodical has not one but two bits of information regarding our heroic, purple-lipped, World Series-strikeout machine....

The Best Night Of The Week To Get Piss Drunk
It’s Friday. A glorious weekend of drinking awaits you. You can hardly wait. It’s not five yet, but you yearn to break free of work NOW and drench yourself head to toe in pure Thunderbird....

Pardon The Coitus Interruptus
Maybe you've experienced the act of lovemaking. If so, please tell us what it's like; we're bloggers. But have you experienced lovemaking as narrated by Kornheiser and Wilbon?...

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Den Of Reporters Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

NBA Will Review Allegations In Donaghy Book It Sought To Quash
The NBA says Lawrence B. Pedowitz, the guy who investigated the league's officiating program last time around, will look into the allegations we documented yesterday from Tim Donaghy's Blowing the Whistle. The NBA: Where Donaghy continues to happen. [CBSSports]...

Seriously, Juan Pablo Montoya Can't Get Enough Tacos
I think we all owe Bob Griese an apology. [Twitter]...

HALLOWEENAROO! Jamboroo, Week 8
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: <em>Monday Morning Quarterback</em>
Today's excerpt comes courtesy of SI writer Peter King's "Monday Morning Quarterback." Read along in the gallery below about Belichick's wizardry, then come back at 1 p.m. for the live chat in the follow-up post. Enjoy....

Waiting In Line For The Sports Guy
ESPN's Bill Simmons brought his "The Book of Basketball" signing tour to annoying East Village bar Professor Thom's last night and our NYC Deadspin operatives waited in line so we wouldn't have to. Bless their little hearts....

Cyclist Gives Surprisingly Plausible Drug Excuse
Belgian Tom Boonen, on his positive test: "I was very drunk. I do not know what happened, but the next day I tested positive for cocaine." [Cyclingnews]...

Tim Wakefield's Wife Is Dog Chow
A judge has sentenced a Boston-area mastiff to death after it bit Stacey Wakefield at an art gallery. Maybe it didn't like playing fetch with a knuckleballer. [Globe]...

Excerpts From The Book The NBA Doesn't Want You To Read
As promised earlier, here are a handful of excerpts from David Stern's favorite book, Blowing the Whistle, by Tim Donaghy....

The Book The NBA Doesn't Want You To Read
We've obtained a copy of Tim Donaghy's book, Blowing the Whistle, which purports to expose the NBA's "culture of fraud" and which Random House was set to publish next month — until, a source says, the league threatened to sue....

Olympic Pothead Is Now High On Civil Service
Ross Rebagliati—everyone's favorite dope smoking Olympic snowboarder—is running for a seat in Canada's parliament. You see, in Canada, election districts are called "ridings" and he probably just got confused because he was so freakin' high. [CTV/Victoria Times]...

The NCAA Won't Be Lied To (Or, Why To Avoid Deion Sanders)
Oklahoma State wide receiver Dez Byrant has been suspended for an entire year, not for breaking rules, but for lying about not breaking rules. Because misleading an NCAA investigator is the worst crime a human can commit....

Smarty Pants Web Mag Goes A Little Laddy With "Baseball's Sexiest Teammates"
Here's a gallery-friendly rundown of baseball's best WAGs by position. For example: your pitching staff for this squad would trot out Ann Margret, Alyssa Milano, and Mamie Van Doren. [Daily Beast]...

Statistical Proof Of Baseball's Strangest Season Ever
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Bodenheimer's "Quit Snitchin'" Memo To ESPN Employees Gets Snitched
As noted yesterday, ESPN President George Bodenheimer took up his quill on Friday and expressed "disgust" at company leaks that enable "destructive" and "unwanted" publicity and that could occasion the leaker's "immediate termination." His memo was then leaked to us....

Griese Taco Crack Leads To Explosive Consequences
ESPN/ABC announcer Bob Griese has been suspended from working this week's college football games, after saying on air that Juan Pablo Montoya was missing from NASCAR's leaderboard because he was "out having a taco". Whoo-hoo! Ten-day weekend! [SI/AP]...