bo Page 835 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Japanese Baseball Robots Already Elected To The Hall Of Fame
Japanese nerds have invented baseball-playing robots with talent far exceeding our own Major League all-stars and they don't require Gatorade or HGH. Well, I guess that's it. We had a great ride, humanity, but our time has passed....
One Mission Tim Tebow Won't Accomplish This Year
Thanks to Clay Travis' question, it's official: Tim Tebow is saving himself for marriage! That's splendid for Sports Illustrated, which will now recycle this cover for next week's issue. See? Even journalism is no match for Tim Tebow. [FanHouse]...
Red Sox Trading For Players They Don't Even Want
The Red Sox, in full panic mode and mistakenly believing they were allowed a 45-man roster, are now collecting baseball players the way most people collect baseball cards: They don't have the space or use for them....
TebowGate Is Tearing The SEC Apart
Forget LeBron, forget Erin Andrews, the real sports mystery of our time is playing out in the SEC. Someone doesn't think Tim Tebow is the second coming. Don't worry, we'll sniff out the blasphemer....
Mad Dog Officially Seeking Mini Mad Dogs; Little Bow-Wows Need Not Apply
Now hiring! Chris Russo really is searching America for a talk show host for Mad Dog Radio. Requirements: thorough knowledge of the 1941 All-Star Game, the '62 Giants, Cecil B. DeMille and passion. Start primping that résumé, Mikey. [Monster.com]...
From The Desk Of Gary Belsky: Altruism Edition
Gary Belsky is the EIC of ESPN The Magazine, which you probably know as the strange, unwieldy object wedged into your mailbox every other week. Sometimes, funny things happen at Gary's magazine, and employees tell us about them....
USF Kicker Nominates Self For Darwin Award With Theme Park Mishap
It's the kicker-gets-injured story that has everything: a second-rate Florida football school, a second-rate Florida theme park, and a totally preventable injury that's not too serious to make fun of him....
U.S. Attorney: Barry Bonds Prosecution Is Important Because Stan Musial Smoked Cigarettes. Or Something.
Joseph Russoniello, U.S. attorney for the Northern District of California, feels very strongly about Barry Bonds and the use of performance-enhancing drugs. Why? Because Stan Musial, the Perfect Knight, turned him into a smoker, that's why....
I'd Rather Tweet With The Saints
It was only a matter of time before a minor league baseball team whipped up a social networking promotion, and when charged with creating a snappy name for the event, why not go with Twitter-My-Face?...
William Ligue's Son Still Proud He Beat Up That First Base Coach
They say it's important to live without regret. And one thing Young Bill Ligue does not regret is thrashing an old man on the field at Comiskey Park when he was 15. You just can't manufacture those kinds of memories....
Hockey Game At Fenway Park To Be Wicked Cold
Bruins officially announce that they will host the Flyers in Fenway Park for next year's Winter Classic, but they'll really have to fling it to get a puck over the Green Monster. [Herald]...
Nancy Boys Play Like ... Well, Nancy Boys
Look, when you play for a soccer team from a town named Nancy, headlines like this are inevitable. (What editor could resist?) Especially when you run away from swine flu like a team of little girls. [ESPN]...
Terrell Owens Suddenly Remembers He Has This Thing He Has To Be At
I was surprised to learn "The Superstars" was actually on last night, opposite the All-Star Pregame. (Counterprogramming!) Thanks to the magic of time travel, I have learned that the episode was way more pointless than usual....
Buzz Bissinger's <em>3 Nights In August</em> To Become 2 Hours Wasted At Your Local Multiplex
That other baseball movie is flailing about, but the adaptation of 3 Nights In August, Bissinger's Moneyball diss track and paean to Tony La Russa and the manly virtues of lineup construction, is moving along nicely. The nerds can't win....
Oh, Donovan, Please Don't Hang Out With Porn Stars At The Pool
It's just Donovan McNabb being polite (and portly) at a topless pool in Vegas this past weekend . And Jayden James, who is/was dating Chuck Liddell (NSFW!), had a run-in with Five. He's a jovial fellow! NOTHING happened. [JaydenJames'BlogNSFWNSFWNSFW]...
Arturo Gatti's Wife Allegedly "Choked The Life Out Of Him With Her Purse Strap"
The NYDN went a little overboard describing the former exotic dancer's physique, but revealed the relationship between Gatti and Amanda Carine Barbosa Rodrigues was always intense: "It could get violent at times." You don't say. [NYDN]...
Nicole Bobek Made Fast Friends In Prison
The New York Daily News published a comprehensive rise-and-fall on the meth-peddling former figure skater but NJ.com gets the real gravy: Bobek endeared herself to inmates through tube-top wizardry. [NJ.com]...
Oddly Enough, Married Athletes Are Still Foolin' Around
And here I thought Steve McNair's death would eradicate unfaithfulness among sports figures, the same way Charles Barkley's DUI was the last one of those to ever happen....
This Was Not The Week For Ex-Athletes To Be At Odds With Lovers
On the day of Steve McNair's funeral, another sordid story comes to light as Arturo Gatti's wife has been detained as a result of the boxer's death....
We Were Wrong. He Can Go Lower
Jose Canseco didn't fare so well against a real fighter. Now he'll try his luck boxing Bill "El Wingador" Simmons. That's not a nickname for the Sports Fella, it's a guy who eats for a living.[Celebrity Boxing Federation]...