bo Page 935 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night ...
What you missed while organizing your chickens ... • MLB: Your first-place Cubs drop the Brewers to third. Let's see, who does that leave in second? • Basketball: Small island territory falls to the might of LeBron James and the U.S. But Uruguay looms ... (ominous music) ... • Tennis: Um, you don't ...
Ray McDonald Coulda Been Somebody
We'd like to take this opportunity to introduce you to Ray McDonald. You've probably never heard of him. He would desperately like to change that....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while corraling your emu ... • MLB: Chase Utley is back, which can only mean ... World Series! Phillies 9, Mets 2. • Basketball: OK, this has got to be traveling, or carrying, or something ... U.S. easily handles Mexico in FIBA action. • Tennis: Roger Federer somehow beats the great ...
Weekends Now Get To Be Fun Again
If you were wondering why Michael Vick has been on the cover of ESPN.com — and certainly taking up his fair share of space here ... including some more in about half an hour — for the entire month of August, it's because it's the most brutal sports month there is. (We personally would put it above F...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while touchin' 'em all ... • Basketball: Team USA beats Brazil! Several Slavic nations unimpressed. • MLB: Wells' debut for Dodgers gives Kent a headache. • NFL: Reviews for Roethlisberger are mixed as Steelers beat Eagles 27-13 ......
About Last Night ...
What you missed while education South Africa and helping the Iraq such as countries ... • NASCAR: Carl Edwards flips out after the Sharpie 500. • NFL: Christ, even Jim Sorgi could beat the Lions. • Golf: Steve Stricker leads The Barclays after three rounds, as well as the Steve Martin lookalike cont...
You Can't Kill Baseball Fans During West Coast Road Trips
We all knew baseball can keep kids out of trouble, give total strangers something to talk about, and sometimes give hope and solace to a grieving nation (see: 2001). But we didn't think baseball was capable of saving someone's life....
About Last Night
• CFL: Before the Winnipeg Blue Bombers' 15-13 victory over the Toronto Argonauts, Canadian touchdown king Milt Stegall is given the key to Winnipeg. Unfortunately, he locked it in his car. • MLB: Boston's win over the White Sox lasts 18 innings, counts double. • NBA: Logic mounts fourth-quarter com...
About Last Night
What you missed while celebrating the birthday of the Big Mac ... • NFL: Preseason ... How's that hangover, Packers fans? Jacksonville 21, Green Bay 13. • MLB: Amazing! Rangers explode again for, uh, never mind. Seattle 9, Texas 4. • Basketball: Take THAT, U.S. Virgin Islands. And THAT. Any other is...
FIU Must Protect This House!
You might remember, during Miami announcer Lamar Thomas' insane rant during the Miami-Florida International fight last year, when he said something to the effect of, "you don't come into our house pulling that," or some similar nonsense. Well guess what, Lamar? Ned and his band of FIU faithful are a...
How Not To Help A Player Cheat In Class
If you're going to cheat in class to help a college athlete, it's probably a wise idea to at least pretend to try to hide it. Use a fake email account, wear a fake mustache, something. Cover your tracks a little, you know?...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while doing hard time for sausage assault ... • MLB: Brandon Webb's shutout streak has ended, and he couldn't be happier. Arizona 3, Milwaukee 2. • Little League World Series: Chandler Arizona, still gettin' it done. My sentimental friends. Affirmed. • Soccer: David Beckham plays an ...
You Know You've Missed Peter McNeeley
You can make fun of Mike Tyson all you want for his repeated "comeback" attempts — though we think he might have permanently shelved them ... for now ... permanently temporarily — but at least he has people who want to watch him fight, for whatever depraved reason. He also was once a champion. Whith...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while waxing on and waxing off ... • MLB: Pujols does that thing he does as Cards beat Marlins 5-2 ... St. Louis still three behind Brewers and Cubs in Central. • Little League World Series: It was raining in Williamsport, so naturally the team from Oregon won. • Tennis: It's raining...
This Also Happens Often To Swimmers
SCANDAL at the University of Hawaii! Apparently, some fella named Ian Sample, who used to play football for the Rainbows, claims coach June Jones used to manipulate drug tests. We're not sure we understand what the big deal is — if you can't get stoned playing for Hawaii, dammit, where can you get s...
Get Your Filthy Piece Of Clothing Here
At 5 p.m. ET today, Matt Murphy, that guy in the Mets jersey who caught Barry Bonds' 756th home run, is going to announce whether or not he's going to sell the ball. Forgive us, but by the looks of an eBay page he just set up, we think we have a pretty good idea of what he's going to do. (We kid, by...
Comcast Lowers Itself To Impersonating You
Our frustrations with the Big Ten Network have been well-documented, but it doesn't really matter, because whenever corporations argue with each other, the only certainty is that we'll all lose. But it doesn't stop their fighting. And now they're using some unconventional methods....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while contemplating the universe ... • NFL, preseason: Three fumbles, one interception and a sack. Yep, the Bears' Rex Grossman is right on schedule. • MLB: Brewers back for a share of first and a handful of those Spanish peanuts ... • Little League: World Series, rained out, which m...