bo Page 944 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
No Bonds For You!
As you may have noticed, Barry Bonds is being held out of the final game of San Francisco's series at Milwaukee (in progress). So it looks like he won't be making any progress towards Henry Aaron's prized record on my watch. Oh well, I'll just have to keep staring at my Arizona State throwback jerse...
I knew well in advance that I'd come out of the Winky Wright/Bernard Hopkins fight frustrated, confuse, and unfulfilled like Katie Holmes' first romantic encounter with Tom Cruise. Truthfully I can't even bring myself to write up my thoughts on the fight, besides, I feel as if I've already inundated...
Who Needs Demetrius When You Have Katsidis?!
Damn, I really hope all of those sportswriters penning their "Boxing Is Dead" stories forked over the money last night. They certainly would have gotten their money's worth in addition to a pleasant relevation. No, Demetrius Hopkins' fight was not televised, and I was a bit pissed. That feeling disa...
Confirmed Family Man Is Having a Good Weekend
Alex Rodriguez tallied his 497th career homerun during a day/night doubleheader curb-stomping of those pesky D-Rays. The Yankees one won the first game by four runs, a fairly respectable margin. Once the sun went down shit got ugly—17-5 ugly. Luis Vizcaino got the win in both games and Shelley Dunca...
About Last Night...
What you missed while attempting to offset your Winky Wright gambling losses by applying for a job as an NBA ref... • Boxing: Bernard Hopkins clutched and butted his way to an unsatisfying decision over Winky Wright. After the fight Hopkins called out Joe Calzaghe who could be heard laughing all the...
The Night Time Is The Right Time
It's been confirmed that David Beckham will not start tonight in his debut with the LA Galaxy, however he has indicated that he will suit up and play. The questions remaining are at what point will he enter the game, and how long will his tender pussy ankle allow him to go on. Blah blah blah. The re...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while choreographing the greatest performance in the history of the Phillipine penal system's talent show... • MLB: The Yankees got their asses kicked by Tampa. The Bronx may actually be burning. • Golf: The preening Spaniard Sergio Garcia is still leading at the Open Championship ma...
Bonds Might Do This This Weekend
After his two home runs yesterday, everybody's favorite beacon of light Barry Bonds is just two home runs away from tying Hank Aaron. Perhaps you've heard about this. He's got three games in Bud Selig's hometown of Milwaukee to go for it this weekend, and then comes home for a week. It's possible he...
Who's the Next MLB Player To Bang Alyssa Milano?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think.)...
We're Guess Jack Daniels Will Cost About 12 Bucks
Good news! If Tampa Bay Buccaneers get confused by the 73 quarterbacks they'll have on their team this year, they will be able to douse their pain with the sweet nectar of hard liquor....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while purchasing donut-flavored ice cream ... • MLB: Tigers' revenge ... Twins get swept. That'll teach 'em. • Soccer: You know what I always say ... it's not really a soccer brawl until someone gets tasered. • Golf: An Irishman is in danger of winning the British Open for the first ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while reading Strunk & White's Elements of Style ... • MLB: He owes it all to clean living ... Griffey collects 2,500th hit, Reds win. • Tennis: Marat Safin advances at ATP Countrywide Classic. Very nice! • Golf: Tiger, Choi first to top of leaderboard at British Open. But it's raini...
Tony Romo's Heart Will Go On
Ladies, it's useless to resist; the smooth musical stylings of Tony Romo are destined to capture your heart. The American Century Celebrity Golf Tournament is over, but left behind is this treasured memento, taken at the Center Stage Club at Harrah's Lake Tahoe on Saturday night. I will not rest un...
The Red Sox Sewing Circle Now Officially Includes Simmons
We don't quite understand all the weird little in-jokes and politics of Boston Red Sox baseball, and, for this, we find ourselves rather fortunate. So maybe a Sox fan can translate this for us, because, apparently, NESN broadcaster Jerry Remy ripped into The Sports Feller on the Boston broadcast las...
About Last Night ...
What you missed during your shocking slapfest ... • MLB: All hail El Duque, stealer of bases, and of our hearts! Mets 7, Padres 0. • Tour de France: Top o' the world, ma! Juan Mauricio Soler pedals nimbly through the Alps. • Pan Am Games: OK, question. If I e-mailed Shawn Johnson to congratulate her...
Tommy Morrison Is A Deep Thinker
One would think "boxer" Tommy Morrison's constant claims that AIDS is "an invented virus" making money for the drug industry, and that "heterosexuals can't transmit the virus" would inspire people to stop taking him seriously and no longer listen to him. That hasn't worked, but maybe his new enlight...
Please Do Not Run Over The Man In The Enormous Thong
If you think the Tour de France is boring, well, you're obviously missing the regular appearances from Borat. We hear they're making a new version of "American Gladiators." We're going to have to insist they all wear this swimsuit....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while solemnly disposing of all your John Gilmore III Presidential campaign posters ... • MLB: Griffey hits No. 587 ... take that, Frank Robinson. • Tennis: Federer, Nadal on collision course again. • Softball: It's the year of the Cat ... U.S, wins World Cup....