boston Page 60 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
DeMarcus Cousins Is On The Sacramento Kings
DeMarcus Cousins is on the Sacramento Kings. He is not on the Boston Celtics. His time on the Boston Celtics has not gone well or poorly, because he has not had any time on the Boston Celtics, because all of his time has been on the Sacramento Kings. (Also he is not on any other teams, except for th...
Chris Sale To The Red Sox, God Damn It
Ken Rosenthal is all over the HOT FUCKING STOVE, knocking down pots and pans and dropping his bowtie in the deep fryer. The soup is bubbling and Ken’s got the first taste: ...
Al Horford's Sister Tells Radio Doofus To Fuck Off Over His Bad Paternity Leave Take
Al Horford missed the Celtics’ win last night over the Heat to be in Atlanta for the birth of his daughter. This did not sit well with Mike Felger, a Boston-based radio and TV doofus, who said on CSN New England last night that Horford should have chartered a private jet and made the game because th...
Team Of Bad Soccer Men Does All Sorts Of Bad Soccer Man Stuff
Meet the UMass Boston Beacons, who should more accurately be known as the UMass Boston Bad Soccer Men after their violent displays during this Division III tournament game against Haverford College....
Flopping-Ass Marcus Smart Conned His Way Out Of A Humiliating Posterization
Perhaps Marcus Smart’s most distinctive basketball skill is his gift for flopping. The Celtics point guard is liable to careen wildly in anticipation of any contact, and he pulled off my favorite flop in NBA history. “I was just trying to make winning plays for my team,” Smart said of the below flop...
Mark Wahlberg's Boston Marathon Bombing Movie Looks Putrid
In the new trailer for Patriots Day, Kevin Bacon, playing head of Boston FBI Richard DesLauriers, looks at a ball bearing in the aftermath of the 2013 Boston Marathon bombing and says, “It’s terrorism.” This is the best part of the trailer, and probably not in the way that the filmmakers intended....
Bruins Go Five-Hole For Own Goal
The Bruins were murder on goalies last night, chasing Sergei Bobrovsky with four goals on nine shots in their eventual 5-2 win over the Blue Jackets. They got to Tuukka Rask too, even though he plays for them. Defenseman Colin Miller mishandled the puck and put it right between Rask’s legs for an ow...
Congratulations, Chicago. Now Get Over It.
You did it. You won the game. Congrats. Now it’s over, and the time has come to move on. ...
Celtics Fan Enjoys Himself
I’m usually unimpressed by the dinguses who do wacky things behind the broadcast table at NBA games, but I have to admit that this dude’s routine during last night’s Knicks-Celtics game made me chuckle:...
Curt Schilling, For What Feels Like The Hundredth Time, Says He's Going To Run For Senate
Curt Schilling, the elite meme curator and former MLB pitcher made famous by refusing to recognize when he didn’t have a leg to stand on, said that he is considering a run for the United States Senate in 2018. This is not a new claim from him....
We Asked Mo Vaughn About The Indians, Dan Duquette And Dressing As A Big Fella<em></em>
According to the man himself, Mo Vaughn is not much of a slugger any more. On a recent trip to the batting cages with his son, the former AL MVP says, he made contact with just three of 14 pitches—at 50 mph. Luckily, he was prepared for life after baseball when his All-Star career ended in 2003....
Boston Red Sox Prematurely End David Ortiz's<em></em> Career By Getting Swept By Cleveland Indians
The Cleveland Indians narrowly beat the Boston Red Sox tonight in Game 3 of the ALDS to get the sweep and advance to the ALCS against the Toronto Blue Jays. Neither the Jays nor the Indians have won a World Series in over 20 years, and one of them will contend for their championship after they each ...
Indians-Red Sox ALDS Game 3 Postponed Due To Rain
This afternoon’s ALDS Game 3 between the Indians and Red Sox has been rained out in Boston and moved to 6:08 p.m. Monday. ...
Baseball Players Get Really Deep When Their Teams Are Down 0-2<em></em>
Three of the four MLB division series have one team in an 0-2 hole. This isn’t a great spot to be in a best-of-five series, but it’s a very great spot for hearing the emptiest and most hackneyed postgame platitudes that athlete speak has to offer. Some highlights from this weekend, grouped by team s...
Indians Slap Three Dongs In Nine Pitches
The Cleveland Indians were down a run to the Boston Red Sox in the third inning of this evening’s game. Within a nine-pitch span, they went from trailing 2-1 to leading 4-2 after Roberto Pérez, Jason Kipnis, and Francisco Lindor all slapped solo dongs to right field....
Root For The Red Sox In The Playoffs
The Red Sox have barreled their way into yet another postseason after finishing last in the AL East in the two seasons since they last won the World Series. The Sox crashed their way to the third seed in the AL on the strength of an 11-game September winning streak, involving three straight series s...
John Farrell To Sassy Fan: "Why Don't You Shut Your Ass Up?"
Last night’s game between the Red Sox and Yankees, the final game the two will play against each other this season, was fairly uneventful. David Ortiz got some cheers from the New York crowd, C.C. Sabathia pitched well, and John Farrell kept most of his stars off the field....
Detective Curt Schilling Is On The Case Of The Hoboken Train Crash
A train crashed into a station terminal in Hoboken, N.J., this morning, reportedly killing one and injuring over 100. The cause of the crash is still under investigation, but former MLB pitcher Curt Schilling has his own theories....
AL East Champion Red Sox Graciously Allow Yankees To Have Cute Little Celebration Of Their Own
There were two parties at Yankee Stadium last night. One was on the field, where the Yankees celebrated their five-run ninth-inning comeback to beat Boston, capped by a walk-off grand slam from Mark Teixeira. The other one came in the visitors’ clubhouse, where by dint of the Orioles’ win over Toron...
Dustin Pedroia Scores Winning Run By Dancing Around Rays Catcher
Dustin Pedroia scored an incredibly wacky run today, jumping around Rays catcher Luke Maile and eventually putting his nuts in Maile’s face to give the Red Sox their 11th straight win....