bro Page 335 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Stories That Don't Suck, With Special Guest Host
Today, our pal Alex Belth, proprietor of Bronx Banter, is taking the reins. He's selected four stories for your enjoyment....

David Brooks Provides Us With Yet Another Reason To Hate Duke (And David Brooks)
I'm sorry, somehow we missed this bit of intellection from the Upmarket Jeff Foxworthy, David Brooks: "How do you construct a rich versus poor narrative when the rich are more industrious?" he mused last week ... about Butler-Duke....

To Sit Or Not To Sit: Do Players Owe Fans Anything?
It's that time of year again: The time when NBA teams, secure in their playoff destiny, start phoning in their remaining regular season games. But are these millionaires really just robbing you, John Q. Slob, of your hard-earned minimum wages?...

NY/Cleveland Media Feud Hits A New Low
Reporters in New York and Cleveland have gone back and forth on LeBron's future for the past couple of years. It's been good-natured until today, when a Daily News scribe took personal shots at his Plain Dealer counterpart. Claws out....

Mark Sanchez Is Poised ... To Be A Whiffenpoof
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

If There's A Gremlin On The Wing, Shaun Rogers Is Your Man
That gun in Rogers's carry-on luggage? It was already cocked, with a full magazine and a bullet in the chamber. Somebody's seen Passenger 57 too many times. [Plain Dealer]...

Shaun Rogers Almost Brings Loaded Gun Onto An Airplane
The Cleveland tackle was arrested at Hopkins International Airport today after he "forgot" that he had a loaded gun in his bag. Even worse, his shampoo bottle was well over four ounces. [Plain-Dealer/WOIO]...

The Steve Phillips Redemption Timeline
AOL Fanhouse hired Steve Philips as their new baseball analyst, just 161 days after the world learned he had an affair with an ESPN underling. Is that some kind of record for morphing from sexual disgrace to professional respectability?...

I Was There...Being Paris Hilton's Manslave
Here's an unexpected submission. One of the young men selected to carry Paris Hilton during MTV's Cancun Spring Break shitshow emailed his experience and, I must say, it is something else....

I Was There Spring Break Edition: Strippers In Mexico
In 2007, "Lyle" went to Puerto Vallarta for his last college spring break, this is his story....

Farewell To The Old Man At Spring Break
Well, that's the conclusion of Pat Jordan's "Down And Out In Daytona" series. I hope you people enjoyed it as much as we did. Maybe we'll get to do something like this again when we have more money to spend....

Great Moments In Drunken Spring Break Failure!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Spring Break Failure, where we showcase heartwarming true stories of spring break gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Harold Reynolds Disputes "Harold Reynolds Spring Break Story"
Yesterday we published a somewhat ridiculous Spring Break story from a reader named Kevin that featured an odd cameo from MLB Network analyst Harold Reynolds. Shockingly, Reynolds claims the story is bogus....

"Paris Hilton Was Taking It From Behind From Some Rock Star..."
Here are some fun recollections from one former MTV producer who worked on several of the network's debauchery-filled Spring Break broadcasts in the early 2000's. He wishes to remain anonymous....

Down And Out In Daytona, Part 3: A False-Titted Spring
This is the final installment of Pat Jordan's Spring Break adventure, in which our correspondent attends a wet t-shirt contest and finds America in a state of permanent adolescence and mild arousal. Read Part 1 here and Part 2 here....

I Was There, Spring Break Edition: Breaking Stuff In Harold Reynolds's Hotel Room
In 1999, Kevin and a group of friends spent their Spring Break in Orlando, for reasons that surpasseth all understanding. ESPN's Harold Reynolds was there, too. Slapstick ensued. Here is Kevin's story:...

Down And Out In Daytona, Part 2: Among The Fornicators
This is the second installment of Pat Jordan's dispatch from Spring Break. Jordan, the author of A False Spring, took his gun and his cigars to Daytona Beach and filed this report over the mojo wire. Part 1 is here....

I Was There, Spring Break Edition: I Tattooed My Goddamn Neck
A very special Spring Break story, considering it's my own. Yes, your humble editor was once a student, and a fool. The Bahamas were very welcoming of both....

I Was There, Spring Break Edition: "He Said, 'How Big Is Your Dick? 6, 7 Or 8 Inches?'"
In 2008, Chaz went to Panama City Beach for Spring Break with 10 friends. He found an 11th one night — a very friendly young man in a car. Chaz's story:...

Down And Out In Daytona, Part 1: A Postcard From Spring Break, Circa 1983
Earlier this month, we sent Pat Jordan, author of A False Spring and a lot of fine sports journalism, down to Daytona Beach for Spring Break. He took a pistol and a van and sent back this report, via fax....