bs Page 108 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Angry Umpire Demands That Jon Lester Fight Him
Yesterday’s game between the Dodgers and Cubs was delayed for several minutes when home plate umpire Andy Fletcher decided to go full Ump Show in the second inning, stalking Cubs starter Jon Lester back to the mound in order to establish his authority or whatever....
Dear Jon Stewart: Thanks For The Ride, Motherfucker
Good day to you, Jon Stewart. I never thought my first Dear Jon letter would explode with expletives, but ever since you, puckish fake newsman, hit what used to be called the small screen with your volcanic potty mouth and flagrant disregard for FCC regulations, you managed to disable just about eve...
Sean "Diddy" Combs Charged With Assault (With A Kettlebell) At UCLA (Updates)
Sean “Diddy” Combs was arrested at UCLA’s athletic training complex today and charged with three counts of assault with a deadly weapon and making terrorist threats, according to the university. UCLA didn’t give any other details about what happened except that “no one was seriously injured” and the...
Aussie Rules Player Knocked Out By Sling Tackle
Medical personnel carried Robbie Gray off on a cart after the Port Adelaide midfielder appeared to be knocked unconscious by a suplex-style slam tackle delivered by Carlton’s Bryce Gibbs....
Tell Us Your Pettiest Golf Club Stories
Earlier today, we ran an excerpt from author Shane Ryan’s new golf book. It was about the unrelenting pettiness of Augusta National Golf Club, from which even squirrels and birds can be banished for getting out of line. That post inspired commenter Clue Heywood to tell us a story about Randy Johnson...
Cubs' And Marlins' Benches Clear, And Everyone Immediately Apologizes
There were no punches thrown in the sixth-inning scrum during last night’s 7-3 Marlins win, and both sides quickly headed back to their own dugouts. In fact, it might have been one of the politest bench-clearings of all time, as the main instigator, Cubs outfielder Junior Lake, apologized unreserved...
<i>Payback</i> Is Mel Gibson At His Nastiest, And Therefore Best
After one viewing, I’m ready to call Mad Max: Fury Road the best English-language action flick since Terminator 2, if not Die Hard. It’s a motherfucker of a movie, a new benchmark in violent cinematic mayhem. I’ve you’ve ever read this column and you haven’t seen it yet, stop reading and go now. You...
Bryce Harper Mad He Flied Out, Actually Hits Home Run
Bryce Harper is on such a tear right now—with a .467 on-base percentage and .734 slugging percentage—that the Nationals outfielder’s flyouts turn into home runs, like the one he hit Tuesday night against the Cubs. Or, maybe Harper was angry that he didn’t hit the ball farther. He’s just always at fu...
Kris Bryant Nails Top Of Wrigley Scoreboard With 477-Foot Bomb
Kris Bryant has been hitting great since his ignominious introduction to the big leagues. He was batting .282 with six home runs before tonight’s game, and his OPS was 24th best in the majors, which is fantastic for a rookie. ...
Cyclists' Squirt-Gun Attack On PedalPub Cops Results In Six Arrests
The Minneapolis version of a biker brawl involved some cyclists, three PedalPubs, squirt guns, and water balloons, but the results were, in their way, nearly as disquieting as the Waco incident—the thin veneer of society cracked like a cranium under a billy club. It seems Minnesota nice ends when yo...
Jim "Learn The Fucking Rules" Schwartz To Work With NFL Officiating
Who wants Jim Schwartz? The NFL officiating department, apparently....
Brian Matusz Receives 8-Game Suspension For "Foreign Substance"
Orioles pitcher Brian Matusz will be suspended eight games after pitching with a “foreign substance” on his arm during Baltimore’s game against the Marlins on Saturday. The MLB announced the suspension Monday, and Matusz is expected to appeal. ...
Brian Matusz Second Pitcher This Week Ejected For "Foreign Substance"
Brian Matusz became the second pitcher this week to be ejected after a strategic challenge by an opposing manager after the Marlins accused the Orioles hurler of possessing a “foreign substance.”...
Let's Take A Look At Andrew McCutchen's Pay Stub
Over on reddit, user Grassiii has posted a photo of Pirates outfielder Andrew McCutchen’s latest pay stub. Grassiii says that a friend found it on a recent tour of the visitor’s clubhouse at Wrigley Field, where the Pirates played the Cubs over the weekend. Let’s have a look (you can click the magni...
If You Left Your Credit Card On The Field At Petco, The Cubs Found It
Tsuyoshi Wada came off the disabled list to go 4⅔ quality innings in his first start of the season in the Cubs’ 3-2 win in San Diego, but he racked up a pretty clutch save, too: he found someone’s credit card on the field as he walked off the mound after the third....
Nick, The Cubs Threw Out Your Grandma’s Personalized Brick
Nick, my man, we have some bad news. Remember when your sweet grandma bought a commemorative brick to be placed outside of Wrigley Field, one that would stand as a testament to her love for you and the Cubbies forever? Well, the Cubs just made a sucker out of your sweet grandma, because they threw t...
How To Win Your First Week At A New Job
The nice thing about a new job is that it probably won’t start sucking immediately. It’ll be easy at first—kind of like the first week of class, where the only thing expected of you is your presence and appropriate clothing (anything beyond pajamas). But unlike the first week of school, your first w...
Citi Field Fan Can't Stop Groping The Woman Next To Him
We’re going to assume these two people know each other, but it still doesn’t excuse this guy trying to cop a feel on the woman next to him while sitting in primo seats for today’s Brewers-Mets game at Citi Field. She’s clearly not into your groping, dude. Don’t grope! ...
Pittsburgh Pirates Lose In Hilarious Fashion
After the Cubs blew a chance to win when Starlin Castro was easily thrown out at the plate in the bottom of the 10th, Chicago made good when Gregory Polanco was unable to handle a similar short popup with the bases loaded in the 12th. In classic baseball scoring fashion, it was declared a single....
Somebody Find Kenny A Milk Crate To Stand On
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