bs Page 163 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Finding A Silver Lining In Wayne Rooney’s Stupidity (NSFW)
If, like many of us, you met news of Wayne Rooney putting his gnarled willy inside some attention-seeking tart with a world-weary sigh, today probably hasn't been the most exciting day for football news (although it's made international week slightly more interesting.)...

Now They're Punching Each Other At The U.S. Open
A fight broke out in the stands at Arthur Ashe Stadium last night at the U.S. Open, briefly stopping play during an otherwise lackluster match between Novak Djokovic and Philipp Petzschner. Everyone seems to be brawling these days....

Finally, A Baseball Fight That Doesn't Disappoint
A night after bowling over the catcher, Nyjer Morgan gets a pitch behind him. Morgan goes after the pitcher, when — BAM! — Gaby Sanchez out of nowhere. This was a good one, folks. [MLB.com]...

Let's All Giggle Immaturely At These Fellows' Names
Headline of the young month: "Butts Arrested In Boob Murder Case."...

The Return Of The US Women’s College Football Fight
Remember the spate (well, two or three) of women's college football brawls that broke out in the US towards the end of last year? Those were good times, no?...

Brandon Spikes Sex Tape Is $1,500 Well-Spent (Confirmation Update)
The Chatroulette performance that wasn't quite up to our athlete dong standards finally finds a home, at WorldStarHipHop. Judge for yourself if it's actually him, but don't do it at the office. [NSFWBOOBSANDPENIS]...

Everybody Needs To Stop Talking About The Cubs' Future For A Few Months
After Lou Piniella announced he was retiring after last Sunday's game—fittingly, it was a blowout—the Chicago and national media started yammering on about who would replace him, and What It All Means For The Cubs. Please make it stop....

Larissa Riquelme's Boobs Now Holding Cellphones Professionally
Everyone's favorite Paraguayan model is shilling for Nokia and is now contractually obligated to put only that company's products between her breasts. That concludes this month's installment of Larissa Riquelme news. [Metro]...

John Buccigross' "Whore" Problem
On yesterday's SportsCenter, anchor John Buccigross—most likely reading from Elin Nordegren's statement—said, "It was a real marriage for whore." What a jagoff....

Bodybuilder Leaps Off Stage To Fight Judge
This is from Mexico, and the muscly dude is really angry. Beyond that, we don't know anything about this clip. But we think this might be how Miss Mexico just won the Miss Universe pageant....

When Arm Wrestling Becomes Attempted Murder
A Florida man went nutso after losing an arm wrestling match, driving his pickup truck into a crowd and holding a rifle to the head of the guy who beat him. Seems reasonable. [TCPalm, via Weed/Speed]...

Sammy Sosa Blasts Chicago, Is Totally Blameless Himself
Sosa gives his first big interview in years, and perfectly (if inadvertently) sums up the legacy of the steroid era: "My numbers don't lie...Those numbers are going to stay there forever." [Chicago Magazine]...

Hire Ryno Now. I insist.
I've already admitted my Cubs fandom to you. So bear with me having to instantaneously share this info (H/T Tomuban) with you ......

And Now, MLB Mad-Libs
A 41-year-old man was arrested after allegedly spewing racial epithets at a security worker and yelling at a woman who spurned his advances during a ______ ___ ___ [proper name] game....

Nenad Krstic Was Arrested For Throwing That Chair
Following yesterday's basketbrawl at the Acropolis Tournament, Athens police arrested Nenad Krstic for his role in the fight since his chair hit Yannis Bouroussis, leaving Bouroussis with a "bloody wound on the side of his head." Plate-breakingly bizarre updates inside....

Greeks And Serbs Fight It Out On The Basketball Court, With Their Fists
The Acropolis Tournament in Athens ended today when the Greek and Serbian teams got into a bench-clearing brawl. Come for the punching, stay for the Nenad Krstic chair-throwing. [AP]...

Foul Ball Couple Update: Bo The Bailer's Ex Makes A Semi-Nude Preemptive Strike
After Bo threatened to release nude photos from their ill-fated relationship, Sara Saco-Vertiz beat him to the punch....

A List Of Other Things Thrown At Tila Tequila By Furious Clown-Faced Teenagers
The Village Voice's Camille Dodero was onstage when the former (?) reality star was attacked by the angry Juggalos. Yes, they threw rocks at her, but here's the list of other items which may or may not have pelted poor Tila....

Remembering The Greatest Basebrawl Of All Time
Twenty-six years ago today, the Braves and the Padres decided to forgo their obligations of playing baseball and instead sporadically cleared their benches and punched each other in the face. It's one of the best baseball fights ever, if not the best....

The Reds-Cardinals "Brawl" Derided For Your Pleasure
For a second, last night's Cardinals-Reds "brawl" was pretty exciting, but only in the sense of "Oh, this'll be good." And then it wasn't good. For this reason, it deserves to be mocked. With video! Three times!...