bs Page 181 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Germans Haven't Quite Perfected The Bomb Scare
When I'm late for a plane, typically I do not need to stall the flight by some elaborate means. After all, the flight will find a way to be 2 hours late on its own! Ha-ah! [wacky Vaudevile jig] If only reporters late for their Euro 2008 assignment were so wise....
Cubs' Curse: 'Sorry I'm Late; Traffic Was A Bitch'
For all of those who thought that fate had given the Cubs a pass this season; for all who doubted The Curse and figured that 100 years of futility were enough, well, think again, Mojambo. Take a look at your roster tomorrow and notice that heaping helping of Micah Hoffpauir, where Alfonso Soriano sh...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while hoping there's not a twist at the end of this one......
The Inane "Cubs Fans-White Sox Fans: Who's Hotter?" Debate Rages On
This should make for some interesting conversation at the Pants Party [The Sports Hernia]...
Kuroda Is The New Rikishi
This lissome fellow is Mongolian sumo wrestler Hakuho, who looks to be contemplating where to start peeling the foil off the hardball to get to the chocolately goodness within. I've tried Hakuho, it's pretty low-grade stuff. He was one of a group of sumo on hand to watch the Dodgers Hiroki Kuroda d...
Steroid Dealer David Jacobs Gave Himself Unfortunate Nickname
David Jacobs, the NFL steroid snitch found shot dead in his Plano, Texas home with his girlfriend, didn't hide his love of all things performance-enhancing, and it may have cost him his life....
"Inside The NFL" Returns ... To Showtime
Good news, everybody: Those lamenting the loss of "Inside The NFL" take heed, because it's returning to television! Yay! Wait, it's only on Showtime. Boo!...
Cubs Sail Blindly Into Uncharted Waters
So Chicagoans awoke this morning, poked themselves with sharp objects and discovered that, no, they weren't dreaming. As the sun came up on the month of June, Cubs fans found themselves with the best record in baseball; the first time that has happened so late in the season since Heinie Zimmerman a...
Jim Edmonds Is Useful!
Well, at least for a day. The recent Padres castoff, coming in batting an Andruw Jones-esque .167, went 3-for-4 with a homer as the Cubs charged back from an 8-0 deficit to overcome the Rockies 10-9. The Cubbies went deep four times, including back-to-backage from Fukudome and Edmonds, to stay a gam...
Welcoming The Pill In A Leathery Embrace ... No!
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's best baseball g...
We Must All Protect Alfonso Soriano's Feelings
You know the Cubs are competitors this year because their fans are getting ornery. And the target of their orneriness has been Alfonso Soriano, who plays left field as if he's crossing ice with eels as slippers. But the Cubs organization has had just about enough of fans' darned negativity....
Former Major Leaguer Killed By Lightning, As We Are Left To Ponder, WTF?
As we open the file of stuff you never in a million years thought would happen: Former major leaguer Geremi Gonzalez was killed by lightning on Sunday while riding a personal watercraft on a lake in his native Venezuela. You may recall that Gonzalez won 11 games for the Cubs as a rookie in 1997, but...
Man: The Edmonds Thing Is Really Happening
Augh ... man, the Cubs really did sign Jim Edmonds. Other than Pujols or Willie McGee signing with those guys, we can't imagine our brains hurting more than they do to see this. And we're sure Cubs fans don't feel any better about it. Proceed with extreme caution, Jim; Cards fans can no longer prot...
Cubs Have Second-Best Record In Baseball! (Me No Like Bizarro World)
If it weren't for those insufferable Diamondbacks, who play in the NL West and therefore should only get to count every other win, the Chicago Cubs would be our new overlords. As it is the Northsiders have a 24-16 record after their 8-5 win over the Padres on Wednesday, one game worse than Arizona's...
People Not Quite Old Enough To Remember The Last Cubs' Title
Forgive us the doubling-up on Cubs stuff today, but we just can't help ourselves: A new story in — of course — AARP Magazine chronicles the plight of old people just trying to stay alive long enough to see a Cubs World Series win. (Via wrigleyville23.) Our suggestion is to look into cryogenics....
Jim Edmonds To The Cubs? Nooooooooooo!
Through it all, through all the hamboning and declining skills, we Cardinals fans have always loved Jim Edmonds. How do you not love a guy who has tattoos of both Darryl Kile and Josh Hancock? But man, if he signs with the Cubs, as has been heavily rumored, we might have a problem....
Zero To Three In Six Seconds
Somewhere, Neal Ball and Bill Wambsganss are smiling (which is creepy, because they're dead). They finally get to welcome another member into the Cleveland Unassisted Triple Play Club, as Asdrubal Cabrera made the magic happen on Monday night against the Blue Jays. It was the 14th unassisted triple ...
His Lawrence Phillips Jersey Was In The Wash
Among the many wonders of Walt Disney World in Orlando are the Magic Kingdom, Space Mountain, and of course the occasional kid wearing the Mark Chmura jersey. Guess who's not allowed in the hot tub portion of the hotel pool?...
Ten Years Since Wood's Amazing Game
We love reminders of just how old we really are. Newsweek informed us that it has been 10 years since "Seinfeld" went off the hair air, which is just jaw-dropping, when you think about it. But that's nothing like Friends Of The Program's revelation: It has been 10 years since Kerry Wood's 20-strikeo...
Cubs-Cardinals: First Place In May Is On The Line!
Forgive us a little bit of that "favoritism" that so brands the blog world such a dangerous place ... but we're pretty freaking excited about the Cubs-Cardinals series this weekend....