bu Page 339 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Urban Meyer's New Contract Has Some Massive Buyout Clauses
There doesn’t appear to be anything especially crazy in Urban Meyer’s new contract, but along with a salary bump that at least nominally makes him higher-paid than Jim Harbaugh, the coach of the defending college football champs locked in some nice buyout figures, should Ohio State decide to fire h...
The Pissbabies Win: Yasiel Puig Says He's Cutting Down On Bat Flips
Here’s some crappy news from the Los Angeles Times regarding Dodgers outfielder Yasiel Puig, a favorite around these parts:...
Giants Opening Day Features Madison Bumgarner Riding A Horse Onfield
The Giants opened their home schedule in San Francisco today, which meant the World Champions held the appropriate ceremony to raise the World Series banner. That ceremony also featured World Series MVP and post-mensch Madison Bumgarner riding a horse, in the outfield, before the game....
How To Book A Music Festival
Over the past few weeks, your hip friends have been excitedly clogging up your social-media feed with chatter about the bands that will be playing over three days in some remote location you've never even heard of. Meanwhile, the first weekend of Coachella 2015 has ended, and the second weekend is...
Latest NFL Draft Fluff: Marcus Mariota Is The No. 1 Pick Now, I Guess
Ask any football writer—the beat guys, not the draftheads—what sort of coverage they hate the most, and they’ll tell you it’s draft speculation. Ask any football writer what sort of coverage gets the most sweet, sweet pageclicks, and they’ll tell you it’s draft speculation. People love this shit, a...
David Ortiz Greets Jacoby Ellsbury: "Hey, Rich Bitch"
David Ortiz took a second to mess with a couple of his former teammates, as the Yankees clobbered the Red Sox last night. Big Papi wiggled his fingers at Stephen Drew and called out to Jacoby Ellsbury with a “Hey, rich bitch!”—likely a reference to the 7-year, $153 million contract that lured Ellsb...
Thomas Müller Scores Goal From Seemingly Impossible Angle
Despite being ridiculously shorthanded, Bayern Munich is having its way with Frankfurt today with the most impressive effort coming from Thomas Müller, who played what looks like an almost impossible angle for Bayern’s third goal. ...
No, But Seriously, Dove Soap Is Bad
So yesterday, BuzzFeed's editors, in a super duper blatant breach of the tenets of their Editorial Standards And Ethics Guide, deleted a post in which staff writer Arabelle Sicardi criticized toiletries brand Dove for its sleazy, exploitative advertising. Dove, you see, is owned by Unilever—the m...
Report: Troy Polamalu Has Revelation In Church, Retires
According to the Uniontown, Pa. Herald-Standard, Pittsburgh Steelers safety Troy Polamalu called owner Dan Rooney last night and retired. Polamalu missed four games due to injury last season, his 12th, and there were reports last month that the Steelers didn’t want Polamalu back, and hoped he would...
Kendall Gill Remembers How He Learned Not To Trash Talk Michael Jordan
It’s kind of crazy that we’re still hearing new stories about Michael Jordan’s famously hyper-competitive streak this far past his playing career. Today, Kendall Gill posted a video of one particular incident when MJ got his revenge on him and Alonzo Mourning after the young ‘uns had the audacity t...
How The Hell Do I Clean A Pair Of Headphones?
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
The Beer Idiot: Lucky Buddha
Lucky Buddha Beer is beer. Because of the fact that I have had many other beverages definitively known to science as beer (not bragging ... much), merely tasting the Lucky Drink Co. product was proof positive: This is beer. Beyond that meek pronouncement, however, the bona fides of this stuff are ...
Gary Harris Gets Ankles Demolished By Crossover, Doesn't Quit Basketball
The Lakers played in Denver last night. By the fourth, they were losing by a zillion, which meant that both the Lakers’ Dwight Buycks and the Nuggets’ Gary Harris were matched up against each other. ...
Morgantown Bans Outdoor Couches In Attempt To Halt Couch Burning
Morgantown, West Virginia is synonymous with couch burning. It’s the home of West Virginia University, and when they win an important sports contest, lose an important sports contest, or if the U.S. military kills Osama Bin Laden, people take to the streets to burn couches. Targeting what they calle...
Summer Movies 2015: The Grierson & Leitch Preview
When Furious 7 came out last week, it was heralded by many as the kickoff to the 2015 Summer Movie Season, which was strange, considering it's still April. (And just barely April.) By that rationale, it’s also the start of Oscar Season, or the 2017 Fall Movie Season, or the 2019 Dawn of Human Aw...
LeSean McCoy Says Chip Kelly Doesn't Respect Star Players
It’s been two months since LeSean McCoy was traded from the Philadelphia Eagles to the Buffalo Bills in one of the more shocking NFL trades in recent memory. It was Eagles head coach Chip Kelly—who’s spent his first offseason with full power over personnel decisions doing all kinds of crazy shit—who...
Aaron Harang's Eyes Implanted Into Various MLB Players' Faces
Deadspin readers have overwhelmingly demanded to know what it would look like if various major leaguers had pitcher Aaron Harang’s distinctive eyes. In the interest of service to you, the reader, we present various major leaguers with Aaron Harang’s distinctive eyes. ...
Did Derrick Rose's Ex-Girlfriend Announce He Will Return On Wednesday?
Derrick Rose’s ex-girlfriend Mieka Reese—who he dated for a number of years and gave birth to their son Derrick Jr. in 2012—posted the following on Instagram, along with the simple caption “W E D N E S D A Y”: ...
Lawrence Tynes Sues Buccaneers Over Career-Ending MRSA Infection
Lawrence Tynes hasn’t kicked in the NFL since suffering an MRSA infection in his toe in August 2013, while he was with the Buccaneers. Today he made it clear he blames the team for the infection and the end of his football career, as he filed a lawsuit against the Buccaneers, seeking $35 million in...