bu Page 437 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

No Steroids, No Birthday Cake: Parsing MLB's Employee Handbook
Congratulations! It's your first day working for Major League Baseball. You probably grew up a huge baseball fan, and while this isn't as good as actually playing, you're about to embark on a fun and rewarding career with MLB. But first, there's something you need to read and sign....

Busta Bus
Here's a good one—"The Legend of Buster Smith," Adam Langer's 1993 story for the Chicago Reader on a checkers champion:...

Bills Fan Appropriately Honors Hall Of Fame RB
This is a pretty good tattoo of not-convicted-in-court murderer O.J. Simpson. ...

The Fight Over Mario Williams's Engagement Ring Has Gotten Super Nasty
The court battle between Mario Williams and his ex-girlfriend over a $785,000 engagement ring has reached the "Mario Williams had to hold a press conference to deny he considered committing suicide" stage....

Say Hello To NYCFC, New York's Second MLS Team
MLS has announced its 20th team: New York City FC, which will begin play in 2015, in a yet-to-be-determined stadium. It'll be owned by Manchester City, in partnership with the New York Yankees. It will be sponsored by oil and evil....

Comedian Says Lance Armstrong Asked Her To Eat His Butt
Comedian April Macie is a frequent guest on the Howard Stern Show, and on Monday morning she joined Stern to dish some gossip about disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong. Specifically, she told Stern that Armstrong once asked her to lick his butt in a hotel bathroom....

Joakim Noah Dances To "Pump Up The Jam" With Some Bros And Ladies
This video comes to us from a reader who spent some time partying with Joakim Noah this weekend. It's a short clip, but we like it a lot, mostly because Noah is clearly leading the party through a spirited rendition of "Pump Up The Jam." ...

Get Lost, Norman
From Bob Klapisch and John Harper's entertaining book about covering the Mets in the early '90s, The Worst Team Money Could Buy:...

Buck Showalter Argued That A Double Should Have Been A Foul Ball. After Review, Umps Called It A Home Run.
A truly magical moment: managers from both teams, simultaneously arguing the umpires' call. Buck Showalter? Wrong. First-base ump Dan Iassogna? Wrong. Joe Maddon, claim your prize....

Ottawa's Double-OT Winner Was Not A Thing Of Beauty
It damn well took long enough, but the 2013 postseason had its first multiple-overtime game. And sure it was sloppy, even downright ugly at times, but there's nothing quite like the home-ice reaction to Colin Greening's 2OT goal to keep the Senators alive....

Only In MLB Can Umps Manage To Anger Both Managers Simultaneously
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

The Astros Lost On A Moronic Walk-Off Error
"Looks like we're going to extra innings." That's what Greg Brown, the Pirates' TV broadcaster, said as soon as Russell Martin made contact on this fly ball to shallow right-center. But Brown should have known better. Because it ain't over till the Astros have finished tying all of their shoelaces t...

Lion in Winter
In case you missed it, check out Wright Thompson's ESPN story on Michael Jordan at 50: ...

Brownsville Bum
Here's W.C. Heinz's classic True magazine story on Bummy Davis (Jimmy Breslin called it the best magazine story ever written):...


A Tribute To Rolando McClain's Brief, Brilliant NFL Career
23-year-old Ravens linebacker Rolando McClain retired from the NFL today, general manager Ozzie Newsome announced. But McClain will not be known as a Raven. He signed there just a little more than a month ago. He will instead be remembered as one of the Raideriest Raiders that ever Raidered....

The Summer Game
Nice piece by Adam Sobsey over at the Paris Review on what promises to be a great documentary: Bull City Summer....
![Michigan State Signee Turns Down Football For Rap Career [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Michigan State Signee Turns Down Football For Rap Career [UPDATE]
This is Jay Harris. He's one of the top high school wide receiver prospects out of Pennsylvania this year. He's 5-foot-11, 170 pounds, and until last month, was headed to Michigan State University this fall on a football scholarship after graduating Downingtown East High School. Not anymore. Instead...

This Penguins Fan Sculpted A Sign From His Own Body Hair
A few minutes ago, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette Penguins beat writer Seth Rorabaugh shared this insane photo on Twitter, and holy shit. ...

Marquis Teague Tips Ball Into Own Basket, Exemplifies Bulls' Futility
This happened in the fourth quarter of last night's Heat-Bulls game, and it perfectly sums up the Bulls' Game 4 performance, which was like watching a bunch of dudes try to beat themselves to death with feather dusters....