bu Page 519 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Stay Soft, Dirk Nowitzki
Even before Dirk Nowitzki lifted a championship trophy on Sunday night, he was being held up as a new man. Nowitzki had reinvented himself, we were told. He'd finally "shed" the Euro-soft label plastered to him throughout his career and, to much adulation, morphed into the sort of rugged warrior tha...
PGA's Young Golfers Form Parody Boy Band, Sing And Rap Horribly, We All Die A Little Inside
Tipster William writes in to alert us to "some kind of music group [Bubba Watson, Rickie Fowler, Hunter Mahan, and Ben Crane] have put together." He says it seems like it's a joke and publicity stunt. And it's "very, very lame."...
Bills Fan's Cock 'N' Balls Make The Newspaper (SFWish)
Check out junior in the Posluszny jersey. Now check out his crotch, you pervert. At least it's Buffalo, so he can always have the "it was cold" excuse....
The Twitter Flameout Of Harvey Updyke, Alleged Tree Poisoner
SB Nation discovered ol' Harvey on Twitter on Friday. By Saturday, he had called it a Twitter career....
Joe Buck Is Not Announcing Phillies Game Today, But The Fans Still Hate Him
This comes via Hickey (the photographer is @roscocosmopeco), your usual weekend landlord, whose Twitter pal is rocking this shirt at today's Cubs-Phillies affair. The only problem is that Kenny Albert, not Buck, is announcing the national game for Fox....
This Is Terrelle Pryor's Sweet Ride Getting Towed From A Donut Shop
If this is really Pryor's car—and it sure as hell looks that way—we have ourselves a new nadir of the Buckeye scandal. That it happened at Buckeye Donuts makes it all the more Jamarcus Russell-y. At least Russell had first-round money....
Pryor To Saskatchewan: Drop Dead
Yesterday we brought you word that the CFL's Saskatchewan Roughriders, employers of one Chris Leak, had acquired negotiating rights to Columbus-area sports memorabilia dealer Terrelle Pryor. Today, Canada heard the bad news: Pryor is apparently not down with three downs....
The Mutton Bustin' Season Is Officially Open
It's that time of year again, when small hapless children have their skulls driven deep into the dirt by disdainful mutton. And then we laugh at them (the children). But we're not merely laughing at pain in a public setting. No, we're also celebrating mutton. Look at the disdainful expression on th...
Terrelle Pryor Is Threatening Chris Leak's Saskatchewan Roughriders Roster Spot
Regina just ain't big enough for the both of 'em. Because neither is really a competent passer, and both are long separated from their former glory....
Maurice Clarett Is College Football's Jose Canseco
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Clarett has been right all along, but we haven't been listening....
Boom Goes Columbus
An old friend says Terrelle Pryor might have made $40,000 in a year, just signing stuff. Huh, a living wage. How strange for student-athletes....
Bringing An NHL Team To Quebec City Is Literally The Most Important Political Issue In Quebec
You know all those jokes about French Canada? Turns out the National Assembly of Quebec hasn't heard them yet. This is a completely bizarre story, with obvious law-breaking, party defections, and boondoggles so big you wonder if Halliburton has opened a Québec branch office....
OK, For The Last Time: Plaxico Burress Was Not Wearing Sweatpants The Night He Shot Himself
The night he busted a cap in his thigh, Plaxico Burress was wearing jeans. This is a fact confirmed both by the New York County District Attorney's Office and Burress himself. He was not wearing sweatpants. There is as much proof that he wore sweatpants that night as there is that he wore a crinolin...
Boston Broadcast Notes Helpfully That Alex Burrows Finished Game 3 With "14 PIM, 0 Bites"
CSN in Boston doesn't own Bruins rights, yet they air a postgame show. Without Jack Edwards, you have to do what you can to rile up the fans....
Schools That Won The BCS Championship In 2004, Step Forward. Not So Fast, USC
The Bowl Championship Series just announced it will strip USC of its 2004 national title, the final ruling in the long strange Reggie Bush investigation. USC remains the AP National Champions, because the AP isn't stupid enough to pretend that there's a guiltless team out there. Congratulations, Okl...
Phillies Backup Catcher Has Contemplative Moment Facedown On Pittsburgh Bar
Journeyman catcher Dane Sardinha was seen decompressing like a champion at August Henry's early Sunday morning, which is typical behavior after anyone is forced to backstop a Kyle Kendrick emergency start. Even though Sardinha went hitless in the Phillies loss to the Pirates, he probably made solid...
Mavericks Fan Sitting Behind George Lopez Speaks For All America
Your morning roundup for June 6, the day we learned the value of Bernie Madoff's underwear. H/T @bubbaprog, proprietor of mocksession.com, for accurately predicting what might tickle us this morning (and others for sending in their own grabs)....
Vancouver Announcers Have Different Opinion About Taunt By Vancouver Player, Believe It Or Not
The hubbub over Alex Burrows' biting Patrice Bergeron's finger in Game 1 intensified when the not-suspended Burrows scored two goals in the next game, including the game-winner. Max Lapierre didn't exactly help the cause when he offered Bergeron his own digit as compensation. "Have a bite! There's...
If You Think Buster Posey Got It Bad, Watch Johnny Bench Absolutely Unload On This Chicken
The fallout over the season-ending Buster Posey collision has reached the Hall of Fame. Johnny Bench didn't stick up for his fellow catcher, blaming the situation on Posey:...
Buckeye Voices: "You Guys Remind Me Of Some Tackhead Teenage Broads With Tissue Stuffed In Their Bras"
On Monday, as Jim Tressel announced his resignation, we brought you Buckeye fans' rage-filled tweets at Ray Small. They were so angry at Small for speaking to the Ohio State student paper, The Lantern: He told them that some players "don't even think about [NCAA] rules."...