bu Page 572 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Chris Hovan Did Not Kill A Doe, Wife Says
From last Friday's "Deadspin Deleted Scenes:" It appears the reader who wrote in about the Bucs' lineman's alleged late night conquest was mistaken. Shocker. That's what Chris Hovan's wife, Jaimi, told BucStats.com....
Bodybuilders Flee Event When Drug Testers Show Up
The Belgian bodybuilding championships were canceled this weekend after every single competitor suddenly had to be somewhere else and dropped out. I'm sure the unannounced arrival of the doping officials was just a coincidence....
Terrell Owens Makes Buffalo Seem Like An Exciting Place To Live
Terrell Owens has been a Buffalo Bill for all of about six hours, but he's already the most beloved free agent acquisition in the history of football. Although to be fair....we are talking about Buffalo....
James Harrison Snubs Obama, America
The Steelers' Silverback linebacker has caused many sports fans and journalists to gasp and mutter "you dumb bastard" under their breath after he scoffed at the White House invite....
Adam Burish Survives Horrifying Decapitation Attempt
The Blackhawks lost Game One of the Western Conference Finals yesterday, but Burish's head is still attached to the rest of his body so I guess he has that going for him. Teammate Ben Eager got tangled up with a Red Wing player in the second period and his foot—you know the one with the freshly shar...
Bills' Hall-of-Famer Bruce Smith Charged With DUI
All Bills' bad behaviour, all the time! The all-time sacks leader was pulled over and arrested early Friday in Virginia Beach, Virginia....
Bills' Fullback Arrested on Charge of Exposing Sexual Organs
Urgent bulletin! New York City's public masturbation epidemic is spreading Northwards across the state!...
No, I Meant The <i>Other</i> Game Sevens
Geez, that was a bit of a let down. After a fantastically competitive six game series, the Capitals laid a big fat egg in Game 7 and the Penguins are moving on....
Penguins Superfan Will Make You Question Your Commitment To Game 7
Sure, you worked two jobs to save enough money to get that customized alternate road jersey—but this guy spends three times that on rival teams' sweaters....just so he can goof on them....
Matt Vasgersian: “I Am An Enormous Jagoff”
Our Deadcast guest this week is Matt Vasgersian, anchor for MLB TV, FOX play-by-play announcer, and fan of the site. And, untethered by network restrictions, Matt had some pretty cool shit to say....
You Should Really Be Watching The NHL Playoffs
Last week, I was worried that the Washington/Pittsburgh series might end in a disappointing sweep, but not only is it still going, it's gotten more exciting. (And the other series aren't bad either.)...
Top Draft Prospect About To Get Paid
Top draft prospect Stephen Strasburg pitched a 17 K, no hitter in his last home game at San Diego State. Expect the Nationals to draft him before getting anally raped by his agent, Scott Boras....
The First Manny-less Night In Mannywood
While Manny Ramirez began his hCG-detox in the Suspension Lounge deep within Scott Boras's Orange County compound, his now-abandoned team had to carry on without its lovable floppy-haired, hormone-abusing left fielder....
The $69 "Price Is Right" For Gynecologist Steelers Fan
Ladies of Pittsburgh—if you're looking for a new doctor to take care of your unmentionable parts, may I suggest not choosing the crazy Steelers fan who made a $69 bid on "The Price Is Right."...
Alex and Sid's Dueling Hat Tricks
The NHL got what it wanted—a Crosby/Ovechkin playoff showdown—and the first two games have lived up to the billing. If only they can find a way to make it last longer than two more games....
Warm Your Butt In The Dice-K Memorial Bathrooms
The Boston Red Sox paid the Seibu Lions $51.1 million for the right to take Daisuke Matsuzaka off their hands. So what did they do with the money? New toilet seats for everyone!...
Even The Owner Of The New York Islanders Doesn't Like His Team
Nine years ago, businessman Charles Wang thought he would do Long Island a solid and buy their Islanders so the team could stay in Nassau County. Now? He kinda wishes he could have a do-over....
There's Nothing Like The A.J. Burnett Theater Experience
Athletes like to be comfortable when they watch "300" or "Gladiator" for the 10,000th time. Burnett's absurdly extravagant home theater was selected as one of the best, according to Electronic House magazine. [EH]...
Are You Tough Enough To Attend A College Softball Game?
Of the many and varied sporting events that take place daily across the nation, the last one at which I'd expect a brawl to break out would probably be a college softball game. Preconception: shattered....
Ow, My Balls!
Maybe I'm still a little irked with Boston after last night's Celtics win, but I think a picture of Dustin Pedroia getting pegged in the nuts would bring a smile to my face any day....