Papa John's Creates Poison Pill For One Special Customer: The Disgraced Papa Himself

The Papa John’s board of directors announced late last night that they would be adopting something that’s known in the business industry as a “limited duration stockholder rights plan.” This is an attempt to prevent Papa “John” Schnatter from reasserting his control over his eponymous company, which has done almost…

Nike President Resigns Amid Vague Investigation Into "Inappropriate Workplace Behavior"

The Wall Street Journal’s Sara Germano reported last night that Nike president Trevor Edwards had resigned after the company received complaints about “inappropriate workplace behavior.” What behavior? The Journal’s report does not specify what the complaints contained or who they were about, only that the No. 2…

Fox Sports' Pivot To Video Killed Its Advertising Deal With Sports Illustrated 

In the wake of Fox Sports’ recent decision to lay off most of its writers and editors, and this week’s firing of Jamie Horowitz amid a sexual harassment investigation, there remain a whole lot of unknowns. We know that the grand plan in getting rid of writers was to “pivot to video,” and that even though that was…

ESPN Wants Everyone To Know They're Not Actually Liberal And They've Got Math To Prove It

Amid absurd claims that ESPN’s so-called liberal bias has caused a drop in viewership in recent months—an opportunistic and disingenuous reading of the network’s financial troubles, which were primarily provoked by the Worldwide Leader’s failure to adapt quickly enough to technological innovations and the fact that…

Desperate NFL Puts Shitty Thursday Night Games On Website Belonging To Washington Post Owner

Thursday Night Football, which features tired NFL teams playing in ugly jerseys, tried out an experiment last season and streamed 10 of its games on Twitter. I tried watching once and promptly saw Twitter’s wonderful “social” integration alert me that someone had scored a touchdown before I saw anything had happened…

Internet Man Flays Post-Human ESPN Shithead Darren Rovell By Tunelessly Singing His Dumb Tweets (UPDATE: There's More)

Post-human business doof Darren Rovell did some tweets tonight, like he does whenever a dollar farts. They were bad and bland in their undressed form, but Twitter user @trillballins spiced them up with dramatic vocals and now I love them. Consider this asinine joke our dude probably drafted a week ago.