cardinals Page 70 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

As Pink Taco Leaves, Leinart Arrives
As many of you know by know, the Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals, ignoring pleas from the unwashed masses, have sold the naming rights to their new stadium. And, as would be expected, it's the most idiotic name possible: The University Of Phoenix Stadium. The name is confusing — so they're i...

Our Teams: A Requiem In Three Acts
I. So now it can be written and known: The spinning, sprinting 12-yard sideaways rugby punts are not, in fact, a device that has come to revolutionize the sport of football. Sorry, Coach Zook. Our Illini very well might be the worst team in Division I-A, and we see no reason they wouldn't lose to Ne...

Being Brad Lidge
We are accustomed, in sports, to one moment changing everything; it's probably the main reason we watch. But it's forever fascinating to see how one moment can affect a human being, morphing them from a dominant force of nature to a scared boy in big pants, alone out there. These moments can't make ...

Perhaps Fergie Can Return Punts
They opened up the Pink Taco yesterday ... and the Black Eyed Peas welcomed a new member....

NFL Pants Party: NFC West
It's our division, the one our Buzzsaw was shipped to so they didn't have to travel to New Jersey, Texas and Pennsylvania every year. And we've (obviously) never won it. Someday ......

NFL Season Preview: Arizona Cardinals
We are officially less than a month before the start of the NFL season, so it's probably time to start previewing the monster. The key to the NFL's success — other than fantasy football and gambling, of course — is the rabid nature of its fans. That is to say: You don't see a lot of people paintin...

Matt Leinart Has Himself Some Swimmers
This is Matt Leinart. He is a rookie quarterback for The Buzzsaw That Is Arizona Cardinals, though he is perhaps better known for his career at the University of Southern California, where he won a Heisman trophy and 1.5 national championships....

We're Destroying The New Place Already
It's a new beginning for our beloved Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals, with a brand new attitude, brand new Paris Hilton-humping quarterback and, of course, brand new stadium. The Pink Taco Cardinals Stadium hosts its first official game a week from Sunday, but they're already holding events th...

Clinton Spends His One Night A Year With His Brother At Shea
We didn't notice this from our seat about three miles overhead, but former President Bill Clinton was at Shea Stadium last night, saying the fact that the Cardinals were the visiting team was at least part of the reason he came by....

It's Always Better To Stay On The Couch
Ugh. Remind us why we go to games in person again?...

New Buzzsaw Stadium Could Be Named After Female Genitalia
You might know that the Buzzsaw's new STATE OF THE ART football stadium currently is called "Cardinals Stadium," which, considering its lack of proper monetary compensation, is not a name that's likely to stick any longer than Bill Bidwell can cash a check....

Whitey Herzog Is Mad, Consarn It
As you would probably expect, growing up a Cardinals fan made us revere old Redbirds manager Whitey Herzog. (We even interviewed him once in college, though, to be fair, we weren't using the revolutionary interviewing techniques of ESPN.) He was the grandfather who would kick your ass, take you fi...

You Know What? The Cardinals Might Just Suck, Eh?
Two seasons ago, we headed to Chicago in late September for a friends' wedding. This friend is a Cubs fans (yes, we have friends who are Cubs fans). The wedding happened to be the final weekend of the season; if you'll remember, the Cubs, a year after Bartman, were in the midst of choking away a g...

New Home For The Buzzsaw Debuts
It has always been insane that the Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals, an NFL team, for crying out loud, has spent the last 16 years playing in a college team's stadium. Only the Buzzsaw would rent out a subpar Pac-10 team's field....

Bad Ass Tatt, Dude: BAD. ASS.
We can't possibly thank Inside STL ("Retire 51!") and Cardinals Diaspora for this photo of a Cardinals fan and his eternal devotion to his team. We're totally getting this tattoo....

You Got Neil Rackers, Yo
All right, so we know this isn't real, and we know it's just an NFL promotional video (for a product we don't use; we prefer Yahoo for our all fantasy games, to be honest with you), but we still could not resist....

Go Toward The Light, Emmitt
You thought that finishing his career flat on the turf of Sun Devil Stadium was the most embarassing final image of all-time rushing champ Emmitt Smith one could come up with....

The Most Famous Buzzsaw Cheerleader
So here's the best story we've heard all day, even though it's only new to us. If any of you out there, like us, religiously watch "The Office" — we even watch the repeats — you're familiar with Phyllis, the portly saleswoman who knits and is happy in love with Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration....

Boy, This Busch Stadium Place Is Great
Five minutes before first pitch at 7:05 at Busch Stadium last night, all was well. We were sitting in the bleachers with our father and our fiancee, scorebook and four pens in hand, watching David Eckstein toss pop-ups with a kid who had won some contest. It was hot, but it had been hot all week, ...

Our History At Busch Is Off To A Roaring Start
In the first two games at the brand new stadium of the team for which we have directed a considerable amount of our psychic energy over the last 26 years, the home team has been outscored 29-8. When a baseball team is blown out, it is often to referred to as a "football score;" the final tally was...