cars Page 16 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The 2016 Hater’s Guide To The Oscars
Chris Rock is hosting the Oscars this year, and he took the gig long before the nominees were announced and everyone got pissed because all of them were white. So here we have one of the greatest social commentators of his generation presiding over a ceremony that is in DESPERATE need of a public fl...
Yoenis Cespedes Is Driving A Different Ridiculous Car To Spring Training Every Day This Week
“Hmm, it’s Wednesday, no Bat-tricycle today. Get the Lambo.”...
Volkswagen-Sponsored Wolfsburg Fine Nicklas Bendtner For Posting A Photo Of Himself With A Benz
Nicklas Bendtner has always been, let’s say, a vibrant character. A few years ago, he whipped his dick out and tried to hump a taxi, UEFA fined for wearing the wrong underwear, and he’s been arrested for trying to kick down a door in his own apartment building because he wanted to go swimming. Bendt...
Curt Schilling Contributed To Ben Carson Campaign, Joked About Being Fired From ESPN On Donation Form
ESPN baseball analyst Curt Schilling wasn’t sure if he was going to continue to be an ESPN baseball analyst when he donated $250 to Ben Carson’s campaign, according to a Federal Election Commission filing acquired by Tom Kludt of CNN....
Bruce Arians: Carson Palmer "Didn't Lose The Damn Game"
You can’t lose as badly as the Cardinals did without having enough blame to go around. But given his stat line, the visibility of his position, and the questions throughout his career arc that this season was supposed to shake, this will be remembered as Carson Palmer’s personal meltdown....
Austrian TV Gives NFL Conference Title Games The Star Wars Treatment
We’ve previously covered in this space our appreciation for Austria’s approach to NFL coverage. Österreich is just wild about American football, and official broadcaster PULS4 has produced this Star Wars-themed promo for Sunday’s games. It’s... interesting....
LOL Just Kidding The Cardinals Won Anyway
Remember those Aaron Rodgers heroics from a few minutes ago, how he threw for a first down on fourth-and-20 and then found the end zone on the final play of regulation to force overtime? Yeah, he never touched the football again as Carson Palmer found Larry Fitzgerald a few times—the last on a goal-...
If The Oscars Nominated Good Movies, They Wouldn't Be The Oscars
For 363 days a year, nobody gives a fuck about the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. Today is one of the two remaining days, when suckers care—and other suckers pretend to care—about who gets nominated for the Oscars, which are worthless trash and always have been....
CNN Makes Charles Barkley Talk Politics To Promote Debate; Chuck Trashes "Awful" CNN
CNN is the home of next week’s Republican debate, and tonight’s ever-encroaching instance of corporate synergy found Turner’s Charles Barkley being forced, hostage-proof-of-life style, to talk politics. And talk he did, slamming Donald Trump and trashing CNN—saying the network has “done an awful job...
Carson Palmer Runs For A Touchdown, Eats It
Cardinals quarterback Carson Palmer ran for the game-winning score in Sunday’s game against the 49ers, which was his first rushing touchdown since 2012, so the old man tried one of those celebrations that all the cool players do. He put too much behind his spike, and fell over....
Here's What To Do When You Barf In The Car
My guest this week on the official Ask a Clean Person podcast is Freddy Hernandez, a/k/a Tavarish, of Jalopnik fame, who joined me in the studio to lend his expertise to more of the messes you all are making of your cars. And boy, are you ever making some messes!...
I Want To Know Everything About Carson Palmer's Friends Pup, Phil and Sugar Cane
Andre Ellington’s fourth quarter touchdown against Seattle on Sunday sent Arizona quarterback Carson Palmer into a tizzy, pumping his fist and telling the Seahawks crowd to suck it. But after coming in for criticism and with a possible fine looming on the horizon, Palmer says his exulting was direct...
Drew Stanton Danced And Carson Palmer Told The Crowd To Suck It
While a new piece of Peyton Manning falls onto the field every week, another aging quarterback with an injury history is having his Kurt Warner period. Carson Palmer didn’t have the cleanest game Sunday against the Seahawks—with two of his three turnovers resulting in touchdowns—but he did come away...
Big Fat Fabulist Ben Carson's West Point Story Is Bogus
Republican presidential candidate and hip-hop impresario Ben Carson is full of beans. Possibly he is as much as 82-percent beans! His tales of youthful violence keep changing, his Mannatech disavowal was bogus on its face, and now his story of receiving a full scholarship to the U.S. Military Academ...
A More Honest Version Of Ben Carson's Rap Campaign Ad
As we noted earlier today, Republican presidential candidate Dr. Ben Carson has a rap campaign ad. We found the ad lacking a bit in some of the neurosurgeon’s more intellectual observations, though, and so we made him a new version....
Ben Carson Made A Rap Song For The Blacks
With the 2016 election now just a year away, presidential campaigns are finally getting down to serious business. As Barack Hussein Obama proved seven years back, there are oodles of black people in this country, and some even vote. The blacks are a valuable constituency, so it behooves each preside...
Here's What Happened Last Time Chris Rock Hosted The Oscars
Chris Rock will host the 2016 Oscars, which gives us hope for a brighter, less boring award-show future. The last time he was on duty was 2005, and he did a pretty bang-up job. He was also much meaner than you probably remember....
Here's Your Ridiculously Early 2016 Oscar Preview
The next Academy Awards will be hosted by Chris Rock and will be held on February 28, 2016. That is 130 days from now. By then, the Iowa caucus, and the New Hampshire and South Carolina primaries, will be over. The Super Bowl will be a fading memory. Selection Sunday will be two weeks away. It is a ...
Is A Parking Garage Really Not Liable If My Car Gets Damaged Or Stolen?
Welcome back to Ask a Lawyer, where I, a lawyer, respond to your questions. Got a vexing legal issue? Send it over, or drop it in the comments below. Today’s query:...
Toronto Film Festival 2015: 10 Movies We Can’t Wait To See
The 40th Toronto Film Festival, which kicks off Thursday, represents both what’s great and what’s maddening about the fall movie season. With the summer blockbusters behind us, we can focus more on serious, ambitious dramas—though some of those might turn out to be lame awards bait or pretentious mi...