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Ndamukong Suh Tried To Break Jay Cutler: Detroit-Chicago, In A GIF
Chicago 13, Detroit 7: This unnecessarily vicious hit notwithstanding, the Lions got steamrolled by the Bears, to the extent that a team can get steamrolled in a 13-7 game. It was one of those "defensive battles," I suppose....
Your Monday Night Football Open Thread
Detroit Lions at Chicago Bears (ESPN): The Bears are coming off an inconveniently scheduled bye week this year. Two weeks ago, they destroyed the Jacksonville Jaguars 41-3, after smoking the Cowboys (34-18) and the Rams (23-6) the previous two weeks. They were rolling, man! And then they had to hit ...
Al Capone Once Got A Motorcade Escort Into The Northwestern-Nebraska Game
Today Nebraska and Northwestern play their sixth game in a rivalry that began in 1902. As the Huskers are a recent refugee to the Big Ten, this will be the first trip for Nebraska to Evanston since October 1931. Among the spectators in that game, according to this delightful clipping the Northwester...
Deadspin NBA Shit List: Bill Cartwright, The Scourge Of The Free-Throw Line
A celebration of the NBA's most infuriating players, both past and present. Read other NBA Shit List entries here....
Brian Urlacher Says It's Seriously Time To Chill With The Jay Cutler Hate
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: A 4-1 start will mute a lot of criticism....
![The Air-Humping Chicago Bears Assistant Coach Is Really Gross [UPDATE: The Air-Humper Has Been Identified]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
The Air-Humping Chicago Bears Assistant Coach Is Really Gross [UPDATE: The Air-Humper Has Been Identified]
Gross. That is really gross, dude. You're way too old to be doing stuff like this. I'm sure the "Hey loogit me y'all, I'm humpin' air. Hee haw!" routine used to be really funny back in your college days, but you're a grown-up now; a grown-up who should know that air-humping—especially while using ...
"What Do You Want Me To Do—Tell You How Bad My Life Is, How Shitty It Is?": Adam Greenberg's Journey Back To The Majors
In 2005, Adam Greenberg was struck in the head with a fastball in his first major-league at-bat. He's spent the last seven years trying to get back to the majors. Last week, he signed a one-day contract with the Marlins and got his second career at-bat to a standing ovation in Miami last night. He s...
Rob Ryan Is Kind Of Pissed
The Bears smacked around the Cowboys tonight 34-18, a score that sounds even worse when you remember the Bears gave up a garbage touchdown to Jason Witten in the final half minute of play. Brandon Marshall had a big game on the field and on the broadcast. He wound up with 138 yards and one touchdow...
Your Monday Night Football Open Thread
Tonight the Cowboys host the Bears. Romo. Cutler. Other guys. At the end of the night, one of these teams will be tied for first in their respective division. It's gonna be so sweet. In less-sweet news, the Cowboys and Tony Romo have tabled contract extension talks until the offseason. Nobody seems ...
Warren Sapp Called Brandon Marshall A "Retard," So Marshall Filmed Two Video Responses, Sideways, While Driving
On his radio show last week, Dan Patrick baited Warren Sapp into saying some dumb stuff about "kids these days"—how about Cam Newton celebrating a touchdown when his team is losing?! What a glory boy!—and Sapp took the bait, hook, line and sinker: not only did he incomprehensibly declare, "These kid...
The Bears Were less Offensively Inept Than The Rams, In One GIF
Chicago 23, St. Louis 6: If I knew how to make a GIF of myself falling asleep, I would have. The Rams managed to scoring zero touchdowns and the Chicago offense could only muster one. The rest were field goals and a defensive interception returned for a touchdown. Between the two quarterbacks, they ...
Julian Dalrymple, The "Jackass" Whose Blowjob Faces Behind Wrigley Field's Home Plate Went Viral, Is Here To Take Your Questions
We didn't quite expect this video to become an Internet sensation when we posted it earlier this week, but goodness gracious do people love pantomimed blowjobs. At the time we called culprit Julian Dalrymple a "jackass," though it turns out he's actually a pretty nice guy who has a penchant for at...
Dale Sveum Doesn't Even Have The Heart To Be Mad At His Players For Not Paying Attention
This is life as a Cubs manager. There are 25 people (40 in September!) whose only goal in life seems to be to give you agita. They do bad baseball things, but even worse they do dumb baseball things, and after a while it just becomes too much to take and you have to check out. There's no way to stay...
The White Sox Hope To Sleep Their Way To Success
They're in the midst of 20 games in 20 days, so the White Sox want their players to get some rest and when and where they can as they chase the AL Central title. Per CSN Chicago, that means manager Robin Ventura will be giving some players days off. But it also means they want guys to take naps:...
Jay Cutler's Baby Still Learning How To Sulk
I was browsing People's celebrity baby blog, and came upon this: the first photo of young Camden Jack Cutler. Camden's got quite the lifetime ahead, considering his parents are a vapid dullard who somehow keeps finding a way to get on television yet remains forever eluded by success, and Kristin Cav...
NBC Decides The Cubs Probably Aren't Going To Win The World Series This Year
Two screenshots. On the left, an early press photo for NBC's new show Revolution, set in a post-apocalyptic 2027, as the characters walk pass a Wrigley Field claimed by the ivy. On the right, the same picture, taken from the show's actual broadcast last night. The "2012 World Series Champions" sign ...
Some Jackass Made Blowjob Pantomimes Behind Home Plate At Wrigley For Nearly An Inning Before Getting Ejected
Weather delayed last night's Pirates-Cubs bout at Wrigley Field for several hours, and by the end of the 3-0 Pittsburgh win there weren't many fans left in the stadium. There was, however, one guy who really wanted to get on TV making blowjob faces....
Jay Mariotti Is Maxin' And Relaxin' And Writing Shitty-Ass Columns Again
Look at that picture! Just look at it! That's a picture of Jay Mariotti, taken right after he polished off his second craft beer of the afternoon, no doubt, and right before he started talking about how he's always "really appreciated" Tom Waits, and that most people don't know that about him....