chicago Page 104 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Now Batting, Travis Wood Of The Chicago Ubs
Cubs pitcher Travis Wood shut down the Mets in his seven innings of action last night, though the real impact he made was on viewers stupefied by his batting helmet's misplaced logo. The cap appears to have been through some severe trauma, made all the weirder because Wood, being a pitcher, has bat...

Reports: Kevin Youkilis Traded To Chicago White Sox
The Boston Red Sox desire to trade Kevin Youkilis has been no secret and it appears both Red and White Sox have finally pulled the trigger. Reports out of the clubhouse are that Youkilis's nameplate has been removed from his locker and Bobby Valentine said there is a "situation pending."...

Won't Somebody Remind A.J. Pierzynski There Are Only Two Outs?
Top of the eighth, none on, one out, and Matt Thornton catches David DeJesus looking for strike three. The White Sox are well on their way to avoiding a sweep. OK. Looks like Starlin Castro is up next, and—hang on. A.J.? Yo, A.J.? What the—where's he going? Hey! Wait. Did everyone forget? Don't they...

Charles "Peanut" Tillman Scornfully Responds To Local Teacher's Anti-Bears Math Homework
The Bears' Pro Bowl corner Charles Tillman was promoting his Cornerstone Foundation in a suburban Chicago runner's shop, when he was approached by a teenaged girl. She was the daughter of the store's owner, and she was just killing time doing her math homework, when she came across a problem she tho...

Jeff Garlin Struggles Through "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" Before Telling Tigers Fans They Suck
Actor, comedian, and Cubs fan Jeff Garlin took issue with Tigers fans at Wrigley today for being "irritating" or, more accurately, existing. "There are just so many of them too," he told Len Kasper and Bob Brenly in the Cubs broadcast box. He decided to hang out for a while after the rough perform...

The PA Announcer From The Bulls Dynasty Did The Intros At This Wedding Reception
Sigh. Wedding receptions—tasteful, romantic, and boring. Unless you're at the Jaquette and Perkins wedding, in which case, legendary Chicago Bulls PA Ray Clay is there to Get. You. Pumped....

Jay Cutler Says Modern Football Has Left Mike Martz Behind
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: The Bears' old OC was stuck in 1999....

Wearing A Fish Bib And Singing An Italian Song Did Not Give Tommy Lasorda Or Lou Piniella A Heart Attack, TMZ Says
This was the scene Sunday evening at Bamonte's, an Italian restaurant in the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn that's been open since 1900. Bamonte's is a wonderfully old-school red-sauce joint—try the stuffed peppers appetizer and the eggplant rollatini—and it's not uncommon there for a couple of ol...

Hawk Harrelson Has "Sacks Packed With Seamen"
We received several tips about this and considered it to be sort of juvenile. Yes, yes, Hawk Harrelson said "seamen" and it sounds like "semen" and his "sacks are full of them." But then we actually watched our footage and started laughing. Maybe that makes us juvenile, who knows, but it's pretty ...

Bud Selig Gives Hawk Harrelson A Stern Talking-To For Being An Obnoxious Homer
Upset with a one-sided beanball war that resulted in only a White Sox player getting ejected, broadcaster Ken "Hawk" Harrelson completely lost his mind. It was more of the sort of rah-rah-Sox stuff we've all come to expect from Harrelson, but there was extraordinary vehemence and venom in this parti...

Hawk Harrelson Still Has A Headache After His On-Air Meltdown Yesterday
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Harrelson is still steamed....

Ken "Hawk" Harrelson Melts Down After White Sox Pitcher Ejected For Throwing Behind A Batter
This week's Rays-White Sox series in St. Petersburg has been contentious after Chicago catcher A.J. Pierzynski's suspicious slide yesterday led to him being plunked by Rays pitcher Alex Cobb today. When Jose Quintana attempted to return the favor—or perhaps just send another message—to Tampa Bay's ...

Report: The Blackhawks Have Suggested That Patrick Kane Seek Counseling
Three weeks back, we shared with you a reconstruction of Patrick Kane's drunken Cinco de Mayo weekend in Wisconsin. Kane, sources told us, was thrown out of bars and frat houses, for, among other things, choking a girl and making anti-Semitic comments. The cops were involved, at one point, but he wa...

Paul Konerko Is An MVP Candidate, And Possibly Psychic
Just a few scant months ago, the White Sox were seriously contemplating naming Paul Konerko a player-manager. It would have been an honor, but an honor usually bestowed on well-respected baseball minds in the twilight of their careers. (Never mind that Konerko's 2011 "twilight" was yet another .300,...

Once Again Northwestern Wins Nth Women's Lacrosse Title in N+1 Years
The women's lacrosse team from Northwestern University out-lacrossed the women's lacrosse team from Syracuse University on Sunday to win the program's seventh national title in eight years, a laudable feat of consistent ass-kicking that becomes all the more impressive when you consider the key word ...

Bob Saget Sang The National Anthem At A White Sox Game Yesterday For Some Reason
So, this happened yesterday and...it...wasn't terrible? I mean, don't get me wrong, it's no Whitney at the Super Bowl or Marvin Gaye at the All-Star game, but it's no Carl Lewis at a random Nets-Bulls game, either....

Snoop Dogg Tebowed After Throwing Out Tonight's First Pitch In Chicago
Rapper Snoop Dogg took to the mound tonight in south Chicago, throwing out the first pitch before the Twins-White Sox game before Tebowing on his way back to the dugout, where he presumably then planked, owled, iced a bro, then participated in a flash mob. [MLB Network]...

Eddie Vedder, Chris Chelios, And Kerry Wood Hung Out To Sing Karaoke On Sunday
Aerys Sports alerted us to the existence of this video, allegedly taken during live band karaoke night at Stanley's, an establishment in Chicago's Lincoln Park neighborhood. It's Pearl Jam frontman Eddie Vedder and retired NHL defenseman Chris Chelios pairing up for a rendition of The Band's "The ...

Which One's The Crackpot? Which One's The Lesbian? Know Your Rickettses, The Politically Active Cubs Owners
The newspaper headlines make it seem like the Chicago Cubs owner is up to no good. "Cubs Owner Ricketts' Anti-Obama Ad Proposal Risks Stadium Growth." "Report: Emanuel 'livid' with Cubs owner after soliciting Jeremiah Wright attack ad proposal." Sounds like this Mr. Ricketts has really vexed some fo...

Here's Kerry Wood's Emotional Exit From Baseball, After One Final Strikeout
We reported earlier today Cubs pitcher Kerry Wood is retiring from baseball, but the oft-injured hurler promised to make one last appearance before hanging up his cleats. That appearance came today, and it was in a legitimate spot; down 3-2 in the eighth, Wood relieved starter Jeff Samardzija and pr...