chicago Page 104 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Paul Konerko Is An MVP Candidate, And Possibly Psychic
Just a few scant months ago, the White Sox were seriously contemplating naming Paul Konerko a player-manager. It would have been an honor, but an honor usually bestowed on well-respected baseball minds in the twilight of their careers. (Never mind that Konerko's 2011 "twilight" was yet another .300,...
Once Again Northwestern Wins Nth Women's Lacrosse Title in N+1 Years
The women's lacrosse team from Northwestern University out-lacrossed the women's lacrosse team from Syracuse University on Sunday to win the program's seventh national title in eight years, a laudable feat of consistent ass-kicking that becomes all the more impressive when you consider the key word ...
Bob Saget Sang The National Anthem At A White Sox Game Yesterday For Some Reason
So, this happened yesterday and...it...wasn't terrible? I mean, don't get me wrong, it's no Whitney at the Super Bowl or Marvin Gaye at the All-Star game, but it's no Carl Lewis at a random Nets-Bulls game, either....
Snoop Dogg Tebowed After Throwing Out Tonight's First Pitch In Chicago
Rapper Snoop Dogg took to the mound tonight in south Chicago, throwing out the first pitch before the Twins-White Sox game before Tebowing on his way back to the dugout, where he presumably then planked, owled, iced a bro, then participated in a flash mob. [MLB Network]...
Eddie Vedder, Chris Chelios, And Kerry Wood Hung Out To Sing Karaoke On Sunday
Aerys Sports alerted us to the existence of this video, allegedly taken during live band karaoke night at Stanley's, an establishment in Chicago's Lincoln Park neighborhood. It's Pearl Jam frontman Eddie Vedder and retired NHL defenseman Chris Chelios pairing up for a rendition of The Band's "The ...
Which One's The Crackpot? Which One's The Lesbian? Know Your Rickettses, The Politically Active Cubs Owners
The newspaper headlines make it seem like the Chicago Cubs owner is up to no good. "Cubs Owner Ricketts' Anti-Obama Ad Proposal Risks Stadium Growth." "Report: Emanuel 'livid' with Cubs owner after soliciting Jeremiah Wright attack ad proposal." Sounds like this Mr. Ricketts has really vexed some fo...
Here's Kerry Wood's Emotional Exit From Baseball, After One Final Strikeout
We reported earlier today Cubs pitcher Kerry Wood is retiring from baseball, but the oft-injured hurler promised to make one last appearance before hanging up his cleats. That appearance came today, and it was in a legitimate spot; down 3-2 in the eighth, Wood relieved starter Jeff Samardzija and pr...
Kerry Wood Is Retiring
According to a report from ESPN Chicago's Bruce Levine, Kerry Wood will retire today. Wood's struggled this year. He's given up eight hits and walked 11, while striking out only five, in nine innings. Until his hiccups this year, and, evidently, his retirement, Wood appeared set for a semi-successfu...
Derrick Rose Is Now Getting Around With A Walker
With his recovery expected to take eight to 12 months, we all knew the Bulls' superstar was in for a grind. But this is just so sad. Until we saw this photo, we had no idea his rehab regimen would also include bingo games, afternoon naps, and the occasional early-bird special....
Enough With The Mystical Cubs Bullshit, Please
Can we talk about this? Can we talk about everything wrong with the notion that if the Cubs are to succeed—if they are to finally, evitably win a championship—they have to first tear down Wrigley Field? That there is bad juju on Waveland and hoodoo on Sheffield and black alchemy on Addison and maybe...
Steve Bartman's True Identity Revealed: He's Al Bundy
First, we brought you the Jose Canseco joke that launched a thousand Jose Canseco jokes. Now, we bring you evidence that Steve Bartman is Al Bundy. Or perhaps even more insidious, Bartman was merely a stooge in a wide ranging conspiracy to prove the writers of Married...With Children soothsaying o...
Brewers Closer John Axford Blows Save, Endears Himself To Media Anyway
Normally when a player fails to "take his lumps" or "stand up and face the music" or however else you'd like to phrase "talk to the media after screwing up," he is taken to task. John Axford, however, had a pretty good excuse and let the media know via handwritten message....
Here Are The Best Entries In Our Drunk, Sulking Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest
This fine entry kicked off our Patrick Kane photoshop contest, but somehow we knew our wise readers had more in store. And you did not disappoint. I've picked the best ones here—with special commendation for our winner at the end—because we can cram only so many images into a gallery, but keep in mi...
Reconstructing Patrick Kane's Drunken Weekend In Madison, With Eyewitness Testimony
On Monday we showed you photos of a soused Patrick Kane in Madison, Wis., and then we asked you if you knew more about what happened while Kane was there. We had heard some bad stories—that Kane supposedly choked a woman, that Kane supposedly said anti-Semitic things—and we wanted to know if other p...
Cubs Ballgirl Caught On Camera Writing Note Was Rejecting Fan's Request For Her Phone Number
The video you see above made its way around the internet in recent days, and had even been sent to us by a handful of tipsters. All we knew was what we saw: A ballgirl at Wrigley Field filling out a note and handing it to a ballpark attendant. Naturally, an expert (read: Cubs broadcaster Bob Brenl...
Do You Know Any More About Patrick Kane's Drunken Saturday In Wisconsin?
Earlier today, we gleefully shared with you a compendium of photos of a blotto Patrick Kane. He was having good, clean fun at Saturday's Mifflin Street block party in Madison, or so we thought, anyway. We've since heard some things that don't reflect so well on Kaner. If you were at the Kollege Klub...
Patrick Kane's Offseason Drinking Regimen Is Off To A Great Start
Sometimes it's easy to forget that Blackhawks star Patrick Kane is only 23 years old. Wait, did I say "sometimes... easy to forget?" I meant "always... impossible to forget." Here's Kaner being Kaner, as Kaner does, in Madison, Wis., for Cinco de Mayo on Saturday. Evidently he was more welcome than ...
Hawk Harrelson Went Silent For 63 Seconds After Jhonny Peralta's Walk-Off Home Run Beat The White Sox Last Night
The good folks at Awful Announcing have the video from the Tigers' walk-off win over Hawk's beloved White Sox last night. For 63 seconds (I counted) beginning moments before the ball goes over the wall, there is pure silence from the Chicago White Sox feed. The last thing we hear is the ball was h...
Jay Cutler And His Little Dog Have A Message For Everybody Out There
Hey! It's Jay Cutler walking his dog! Hi, Jay!...
Joakim Noah, Ankle-Breaking Point Man
The Bulls' first game without Derrick Rose was a dud—they lost Game 2 to the Sixers by 17—but for one, brief moment, Joakim Noah left poor Thaddeus Young in a heap with this fake crossover and kick-out....