chicago Page 112 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

NFL Is Surprisingly Uncool With Its Players Appearing In Uniform Advertising "Pornstar Exxxtravaganza"
To be fair, those five players are Brandon Flowers, Eric Berry, Kareem Jackson, Jacoby Ford, and Major Wright, and we're willing to bet most potential patrons of the Pornstar Exxxtravaganza wouldn't have identified them all. They needed their uniforms....

Watch Man U's Gary Neville Throw A Truly Terrible First Pitch At A White Sox Game
Gary Neville, who played right back for England and Manchester United for perhaps forever, before retiring this year, was in Chicago on Thursday night to throw out the first pitch before the White Sox-A's game. Man U and the Chicago Fire will be playing a friendly shortly. He and his 400 caps are ...

Please Take Ozzie Guillen's Belt And Razor Away From Him
You might as well take his BlackBerry too. Because the White Sox's eccentric manager is having some kind of existential meltdown today and figured he should share....

Patrick Kane Does Something Really Nice
PK showed up at a 10-year-old fan's floor hockey birthday, because he's an all-around decent guy. See Patrick? We love you! Please come back to us, Patrick. [Chicago Tribune]...

Ronnie Woo Woo Gives Up On The Cubs, Wants Paul McCartney Tickets Instead
Our tipster Steven works for a ticket company out of Chicago, and wrote in to tell us that he'd had beloved Cubs fan Ronnie "Woo Woo" Wickers in the office today. He even attached a photo: "Woo_Woo_Office_Visit.jpg." Ronnie was wearing his Cubs uniform, which is no surprise; what is is that one of t...

Cubs Have Upside Down Logo At Wrigley, Possibly As Some Sort Of Distress Signal
This oopsie is apparently located on the wall of a tunnel near the Cubs clubhouse. Has it been like this for the last 95 years and no one's noticed? Possibly. ...

Watch Wrigley Field Get Buzzed By An Unexpected F/A-18 Flyover
Well, okay, Cubs fans, you can either find some meaning in seeing fighter jets on a holiday remembering American soldiers, or you can be scared that Chicago somehow became the setting of a Will Smith movie come to life. Your choice....

Ozzie Guillen Just Might Have Lost It
Because when you're waxing lyrical about desecrated statutes of a team that started not only A.J. Pierzynski but Scott Podsednik and Carl Everett, you might just be off your rocker....

Being Captain Of The Saint John Sea Dogs Does Not Entitle You To Spit In Memorial Cup, But Watch This Guy Do It Anyway (UPDATE: ?)
Your morning roundup for May 30, Memorial Day, the day we learned the Groupon Voice. Video via tipster Brent, who writes (with a French BlackBerry signature appended!), "Watch beardo spit into the Memorial Cup. His teammates will be drinking out of it. Fucking gross."...

The Heat Wax The East, And Deep Down We Love It
Last night, the Miami Heat ended the Eastern Conference Finals with a 19-4 run in under four minutes to beat the Chicago Bulls in five games. If you were fortunate or unfortunate enough — I haven't decided which it is for me — to have watched the entire game, then you would have witnessed equal part...

Joakim Noah Taps Into America's Rage By Calling The Heat "Hollywood As Hell"
Joakim Noah, who sat on the bench for much of the second half as Kurt Thomas tried to be the hero, pulled off the delicate skill of framing an absolute dis within a compliment last night. Kenny, Chuck, and Ernie are almost always this tickled with the world, but with this giggly reaction I get the...

Your Bulls/Heat Game Five Open Thread
If there's an element of Chicago Bulls fandom that thinks tonight could be the season's end, Mare Bear is not among them. And who knows, maybe she's right. Because if the LeBrons have shown the world one thing this offseason, it's that they're a .500 team on the road....

Your Bulls/Heat Game Four Open Thread
Tom Thibodeau is coaching about as well in this series as Craig Sager is dressing. So much Bogans. So much Korver. So little stopping of LeBron, Wade, and even Bosh. Accordingly, the Bulls lost two consecutive games for the first time since February....

A Streaker Did "A Floppy Dance" At Wrigley Field Sun Life Stadium During Last Night's Cubs Game
In the fifth inning of yesterday's Cubs/Marlins game, some dude decided to leave his clothes in the stands when he ran onto the field. Hey Chicago, whatdaya say, the Cubs ended up winning anyway....

This Is The Dunk That Made Reggie Miller Compare Udonis Haslem To Taj Gibson
Today in very recent historical comparisons, Reggie Miller gave credit to reincarnated Heat forward Udonis Haslem for his Gibsonesque slam. "I didn't know Taj Gibson was playing for Miami this game!" Miller said, in that characteristic lilt of his, all forced giddiness and wonderment. Perhaps TNT ...

Now They're Making Fun Of Jay Cutler In The Wisconsin Senate Race
Poor Jay Cutler. Jay Cutler did not ask for any of this. He did not ask to be born with the most hangdoggery hangdog face of all time. He did not ask for you to question his toughness. And he did not ask to become the punchline in the Wisconsin Senate Race. But that is what has happened....

The Photo Of Taj Gibson's Dunk On Dwyane Wade Will Replace Bruce Lee Posters Across America
Via the NBA Photo Twitter feed, we present to you the posterization of Dwyane Wade (click here to see the full view), who is usually the one doing the posterizing. To his credit, Wade has been only complimentary and self-deprecating about the dunk that was seen 'round the American couches and barsto...

This Is The Only Woman In The World Who Knows What It's Like To Get Caught Between Two Tim Tebows In Her Underwear
Your morning roundup for May 16, the day that Hickey got his edits from Lady Gaga. Tebow photo via @Lisa_Altobelli, who has the full shot....

Here's The Taj Gibson Dunk That Inspired Reggie Miller To Quote Martin Luther King On Air
The Bulls beat the Heat by 21 points at home in Game 1 of the Eastern Conference finals this evening. Taj Gibson, who finished with nine points and seven boards off the bench for Chicago, had the two best dunks of the game. The first left Reggie Miller speechless, and presumably on top of Steve Ke...

The NBA Playoffs Are Less Important Than Hockey, Oprah
One of the underrated subplots of the playoffs is when non-sports events get scheduled for our nation's arenas, and the conflicts it causes when a team goes deep. We've had two notable instances of it already, with the Lightning and Bulls running up against two of the most powerful forces in enterta...