chicago Page 117 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Shut Up And Stop Being Humble, Devin Hester
After breaking the NFL record for return touchdowns, Hester took the podium and before any questions were even asked, emotionally thanked his coaches and teammates. I know he's got to do it, but c'mon. He's earned the right to brag....

Security At TCF Stadium Too Goddamn Cold To Stop Pant-Dropping Fan From Breaking Huddle
No guaranteed seating, no booze, no security, and now it's pants-optional? Also! Joe Webb. Roger Goodell must be thrilled to have made the trip to Minneapolis this evening....

Here's Your "Total Snowclipse Of The Favre?" MNF Open Thread
Brett Favre will start against the Bears tonight. And in the next two weeks, Roger Goodell will announce the results of the Jenn Sterger investigation. The conspiracy theories have arrived, and the race for some-stab-at-restored-glory has only just begun....
![Merry [Bleep]ing Christmas From Ozzie Guillen](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Merry [Bleep]ing Christmas From Ozzie Guillen
What could be better than the quirky White Sox manager under your tree Christmas morning? This foulmouthed outtake reel, wherein Ozzie tries to sell you his nipples, or something....

Adam Dunn Is Probably Going To End Up Strangling Ozzie Guillen
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Adam Dunn on his new city and his new coach....

Ron Santo Is Dead. Aww Geez.
Cubs-Brewers, Sept. 23, 1998, in the teeth of a pennant race. Cubs up 7-5 in the bottom of the ninth. Two outs, bases full of Brewers, Geoff Jenkins at the plate. Jenkins hits a fly ball to left, to Brant Brown....

Joakim Noah Went Into A Steam Room With John Elway And Lived To Tell The Tale
During the Bulls annual "Circus Trip," two important events took place that may chart the course for the rest of the team's season: they shared Thanksgiving dinner together as a team, and Joakim Noah shared a hotel steam room with John Elway....

Bears Fan's Death Ruled An Accident
The 23-year-old Chicago man who fell to his death from a Soldier Field concourse may have hopped the railing to smoke a cigarette, his friends say. His death has been ruled an accident....

Before The Storm, After The Sunshine Band: The Prelude To Disco Demolition Night
Our attention was brought to this collection of 35 rare photos taken prior to a Tigers/White Sox game on July 12, 1979. Not hours later, Comiskey Park would play host to the figurative end of the 70s, and the closest thing to a riot at an American sporting event since....

Who Is Pink Blackberry Cover Girl?
Upon seeing the photo from this morning's Wake Up Deadspin post about Chicago Blackhawk John Scott beating Kings enforcer Kevin Westgarth into bloody submission, astute reader Anarchy Salad posed a very interesting scenario....

Jay Cutler Is Cool With Being In A Celebrity Couple
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Bears QB on his relationship being tabloid fodder....

A Watched Bridge Never Implodes
A pair of Chicago morning show anchors eagerly wait for the demolition of a bridge...and wait...and wait some more. They come back to the studio for some chit-chat, only to completely miss the destruction. They proceed to freak right the fuck out....

Drunk Chicagoan Scales Dinosaur After Bears Win
Well, maybe he's not drunk, just living out the fantasies we all had as five-year-olds. I'm sure the Field Museum loves being smack dab between Soldier Field and the regional rail station....

Russian Lady Hockey Fans Encouraged To Enter "Swimsuit Contest"
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Derrick Rose Does Something Point Guards Shouldn't Be Able To Do
Last night's Bulls-Knicks game was a scoring bonanza. While the Knicks prevailed, Derrick Rose had the highlight of the game: this Dominique Wilkins-esque slam that a wiry, 6'3" point guard shouldn't be able to do....

Chicago Reporter Fired, Possibly For Dating A Player
Jen Patterson was let go by Comcast SportsNet Chicago, a week after her relationship with Blackhawk Nick Boynton became public. That's a quick fall for one of CSN's "rising stars."...

Today In Ill-Conceived, Ill-Executed Tattoos
A Chicago woman was shocked to learn she had received a backwards White Sox logo tattoo on her thigh. Which is only marginally worse than having a regular White Sox logo tattoo on your thigh. [Sun-Times]...

Rays Fans Just Blue Themselves
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Kris "Vertseeg" Gets His Stanley Cup Due
Happens every year. They misspell someone's name on the Stanley Cup, and because of the sacredness of the Cup, he's forced to legally change his name. Sucks, Versteeg. [Sun-Times]...

Area Man Shows Disdain For Team By Purchasing Team Merchandise
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....