chicago Page 124 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Matt D'Agostini Got Knocked The Fuggout
Chicago Blackhawks Andrew Ladd absolutely leveled Montreal Canadiens right winger Matt D'Agostini early in last night's 3-2 Chicago victory. More talk about head shots! Whee!...
Cedric Benson Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cedric Benson, who won the weekend by making the Chicago Bears look foolish. Granted, he's not the first....
StubHub Offering Great Deals On Mythical Mets-Cubs World Series Tickets
For baseball fans who have seen their teams' championship dreams already extinguished, October is the cruelest month. So it doesn't help when some mean website rubs salt in the wounds with offers of imaginary playoff tickets....
Who Is To Blame For Chicago's Olympic-Sized Failure?
Chicago did everything it could to bring the Olympics home....or did it? After all that time, effort and money wasted, someone needs to pay—and there are plenty of places to point your fingers. So let's assign some blame!...
Chicago Mourns The Loss Of Civic Nuisance, Massive Boondoggle Known As The Olympics
Chicago had this thing and it was fucking golden and then, suddenly, it wasn't. And even though Jacques Rogge and the IOC saved the city the enormous, crippling burden of hosting their big track meet, some people were very sad....
Your 2016 Olympic City Is....
Rio de Janeiro! The Olympics will be held in South America for the first time ever (and only the third time in the Southern Hemisphere.)...
Handicapping The 2016 Olympic Vote
Four cities are vying for the right to punish their own citizens with higher taxes, crippling transportation problems, and acres of over-priced and underused infrastructure projects that will blight the landscape for decades to come. Let the torch burn bright!...
The Cubs Cannot Be Sold Until Shawon Dunston Takes Freshman Lit
"Looks like everything is running smoothly with the sale of the Cubs. Let's just finalize everything with your signature here, and...hold on, what's this? A retired journeyman shortstop never went to college?"...
Mark Grace And This Tramp-Stamped Bartender Have Apparently Met
Mark Grace is the type of ex-athlete Kevin Costner wishes he could play in movies but just can't because he's Kevin Costner. Hugging Harold Reynolds uncovered a story about Grace that, if true, enhances his reputation as baseball's patron rogue....
The Exception That Proves Exactly Nothing
One of our favorite gambits here at FJM is the old "use the exception that proves the rule to yell at someone for not thinking the exception is the rule" gambit....
Brian Urlacher's Season Is Over
The Bears linebacker dislocated his wrist last night and is reportedly out for the rest of this season. Chicago's opening week just gets better and better! [Tribune]...
Cub Fans Ruin Their Own Child's Life By Making Her A Cubs Fan
A Chicagoan e-mailed to ask why I have no love for the Windy City. Someone else e-mailed the answer. Meet new North Side resident, Waitle Nex Yeare. With any luck, the state has already placed her in protective custody. [Slanch]...
Bears Begin The Season With Five-Yard Penalty
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Smokin' Jay: Cutler Sure Does Clean Up Nicely
Judging by this month's Michigan Avenue Magazine, the new Bears quarterback wants to mount a serious challenge to Matt Ryan as the best-looking ball-slinger in the NFL. What else is he saying with these hot new looks?...
White Sox Trade Jim Thome, Throw In The Towel
The White Sox, losers of four in a row, have fallen six games behind the division-leading Tigers. And since it's now September, there's really no point in trying anymore. Time to start shedding contracts and call it a season....
They're Not Saying "Boo!" They're Saying "I Hope You Die In A House Fire, You Pansy"
Jay Cutler returned to Denver last night for the first time since his temper tantrum-induced trade and did moderately well for a first half. A Neckbeard-less Kyle Orton also suffered a sewing injury on his index finger. [DenverPost]...
Bleacher Seat Almost As Good As Owner's Box
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Patrick Kane Deprives World Of Potentially Amusing Trial
The Blackhawks forward pleads guilty to disorderly conduct and is ordered to apologize the cab driver he allegedly punched. So this whole sorry mess is behind us. Dang. [Mouthpiece Sports]...
Why Your Team Sucks: Chicago Bears
Some people are fans of the Chicago Bears. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Chicago Bears. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
New Cubs Owners Will Probably Fix That
The Chicago Cubs are officially sold (finally) to the Ricketts family. Meanwhile, Derek Lee's helmet becomes a metaphor of a fading season. Even the logo can't hold its head up high. [WSJ/The CMSB]...