cincinnati Page 40 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NFL Highlight Of The Week: Stokley's 'Miracle' Touchdown
Because the NFL has such a stingy rebroadcast policy, we've decided to recreate the week's best highlight using a white gerbil, a tree frog and actual game audio. Suspend disbelief....
You Are Cordially Invited To The Alvin Keels Pool Party
While the whole Andre Smith contract abortion was playing out, we assumed his agent was working the phones nonstop. Instead, he was making embarrassing videos hyping his pool party....
Why Your Team Sucks: Cincinnati Bengals
Some people are fans of the Cincinnati Bengals. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Cincinnati Bengals. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Pirate Fans Record First Save Of The Year
A grandfather visiting PNC Park last week had a heart attack in the stands, but was saved when the fan sitting behind him turned out to be a trauma surgeon who managed to bring him back to life....
Bengals Owner Will Not Tolerate Messages From On High
Banners trashing Cincinnati's front office were flying above the team's training camp, until the FAA stepped in — at the behest of Mike Brown. The man can't run a football team, but he sure can control the skies. [WhoDeyRevolution]...
This Is Why NFL Players Die Young
There was a very telling sequence in last night's excellent episode of Hard Knocks that perfectly illustrates the culture of "toughness" that ultimately dooms so many football players to retirements filled with crippling, life-altering pain....
Bronson Arroyo Will Put Just About Anything In His Body
Bronson Arroyo admits that he pumps his body full off all manner of unapproved chemicals and that MLB drug tests don't really concern him. And what about a hardcore steroid user like Manny Ramirez? If he dies, he dies....
What To Expect From "Hard Knocks: Cincinnati Bengals"
The Cincinnati Bengals are not quite the trainwreck they once were, but everyone is still hoping for some kind of entertainment value out of this year's edition of HBO's "Hard Knocks" docudrama. Don't get your hopes up....
This Is A Future NFL Linebacker
How did Bengals tight end Chase Coffman develop his "legendary" toughness? You guessed it ... mutton bustin'. [Bengals.com; pic via]...
Joey Votto: Not Gay, Just Having Terrible Anxiety Attacks
"The one night I was alone, the very first night I was alone, was when I went to the hospital. I couldn't take it. It just got to the point where I felt I was going to die, really." [Outsports/GraneyAndThePig/MLB.com]...
Chad Johnson Loves His Quarterback, Uncomfortable Sexual Metaphors
OchoCinco on his relationship with his Bengal QB: "We're like Brokeback Mountain. I'm going to be with Carson so much in July that I'm going to be the nanny (for his new twins.)" That's not....awkward. [Bengals; PFT]...
Joey Votto: Latest Baseball Player To Be Stricken With A Severe Case Of The Greinkes
It was suspected that Joey Votto's "inner-ear infection" was more substantial after the Reds' Italian bopper DL-d on May 30, but now it's been confirmed that he too is suffering from"stress-related issues."...
This Is What You Get For Being A Slacker
If education is a carrot-and-stick operation, then for students in the Cincinnati, the reward for good grades was a chance to meet the Bengals at Paul Brown Stadium. Marvin Lewis accidentally invited the life of the party instead. Oops!...
NFL Recognizes Chad Johnson's Name Change, With Unsurprising Annoying Bureaucratic Twist
The good news for Johnson: the NFL will let him wear his new name on his jersey this year. The bad news? Because of some careless form-filling, it won't appear quite as he'd like....
And Now The Smooth Christian Rock Stylings Of Ben Utecht
Cincinnati tight end Ben Utecht just dropped his first album, a collection of gospel-tinged inspirational power ballads—because when you think "Bengals football" you should also think about the Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ....
Embrace The Goodness That Will Be 'Hard Knocks: The Cincinnati Bengals'
After making it through last season's promising Hard Knocks: Dallas Cowboys without any noteworthy melodrama, HBO decided it needs to inch a bit closer to full-on madness. Yes, Hard Knocks: Cincinnati Bengals is for real....
Door-On-Player Violence Is Not A Joke
Cincy OF Chris Dickerson is day-to-day after getting beat up by a revolving door. This wouldn't happen if you knew how to mind your place. [MLB.com, via Big Lead]...
Get Ready To See DePaul (0-18 In Conference) In Your NCAA Tournament Bracket
Not really. But technically the Blue Demons (9-23 overall) are still alive for a March Madness bid after their first-round win over Cincinnati in the Big East Tournament. [NBCSports]...
What Cable TV Personality Takes Issue With Woman's 'Oldest Baseball Card' Claim?
This isn't really a blind item, because if plied with free beers, I will totally reveal the person's identity. But you may treat it as one if you wish....
Andy Kennedy's Wife Still Not Getting Any
As you may recall, the wife of former Cincinnati basketball coach Andy Kennedy is claiming that a pending lawsuit against a cab driver is so traumatizing that it's affecting the couple's sex life....