closer Page 16 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Heroes, Villains And Hockey Hookers
Since tedious analysis is the stuff of "power rankings," each Monday NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski uses a form of universal expression: Success in terms of beer. Before we get to hookers clearing Sean Avery's good name, welcome to The Brewmeister Ratings......
The NBA Playoff Hunt Continues, Predator Style
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who thinks you should go rent The Predator again. Immediately. Oh, and he also thinks you should read his stuff at Basketbawful. Enjoy! So you cooked up a story and dropped the six of us in the meat grindah! Michael Finley's shooting slump hit a low point l...
The Rangers Are The No. 1 Cause Of Depression
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Where...Crossdressing Mascots Happen?
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is seriously glad it's Friday. When he's not checking out NBA mascots - but only for laughs, not in "that way" - you can find him taking a siesta at Basketbawful. Enjoy! Mmmm, beefy. On a night in which the Denver Nuggets thrashed the Dallas Mavericks 1...
Crying For The Kings During Duck Season
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
David West Is An Assassin
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who gets some serious NBA overload on Wednesday nights. When he's trying to get the pick and roll out of his head, he can be found cracking corn at Basketbawful. Enjoy! Chris Paul made nicknaming history last night. Last night, Paul had the following to say...
Separating The Champions From The Choke-Jobs
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
The NBA Closer: Threat Or Menace?
The NBA Closer is written by J. Jonah Jameson, publisher and editor-in-chief of The Daily Bugle, New York's favorite newspaper since 1932. When he's not trying to rid the world of a certain wall-crawling menace, he can be found preparing his Pulitzer Prize speech at Basketbawful. Enjoy! San Antonio...
Sean Avery Wuz Here
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Kobe Cries Tears Of Blood, Lakers Win
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who believes that only you can prevent forest fires. So the next time there's a forest fire, it's totally your fault. When he's not blaming you for nature's fiery blazes, he can be found fanning the flames of Basketbawful. Enjoy! And the Warriors went down ...
Arsenal Gets Its Bear Stearns On
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....
Broad Street Bullies, Bunnies And Booze
Since tedious analysis is the stuff of "power rankings," each Monday NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski uses a form of universal expression: Success in terms of beer. Before we get to an endorsement in the Hottest Ice Girls election, welcome to The Brewmeister Ratings......
Dirk Has Fallen And He Can't Get Up (For At Least Two Weeks)
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who loves March Madness as much as the next guy but is really tired of hearing the phrase "You can tell they don't want to go home!" I mean, seriously, do the announcers need to tell us that over and over? Are there teams of players that DO want to go home? ...
Shaking Up the Eastern Conference
Last night the Magic bounced back from a loss to the Wizards to best the 76ers in a game that featured 22 different scorers. Although nobody on either team notched more than 18 points each team received scoring contributions from 11players with eight of Orlando's 11 scoring in double figures. Rasha...
Revenge Of The Puck Bunnies
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Celtics Munch On A Little Texas Toast
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who knows he can't compete with March Madness but is going to try anyway. When he's not begging and pleading for you to read this column, he can be found celebrating his alma mater (HAIL PURDUE!) at Basketbawful. Enjoy! Ray Allen stuck a dagger deep in the ...
King Jeremy The Wicked Needs His Chalice
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Heat Forget How To Score, And The Answer Was In Philly
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who's really looking forward to Easter, the day on which Larry Bird returns from the dead to lay multi-colored eggs under a Christmas tree. When he's not wondering whether Larry knows whether he's been naughty or nice, he can be found weaving his Easter bask...
It's Those 190-Foot Goals That Always Getcha
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Remember What Ol' Jack Burton Says...About The NBA
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who's not saying that he's been everywhere and done everything, but does know it's a pretty amazing planet we live on, and a man would have to be some kind of FOOL to think we're all alone in THIS universe. And he's trying to prove that at Basketbawful. Enjo...