closer Page 32 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Isiah, Knicks Manage To Stay Out Of Trouble For A Day
Ed. note: This was supposed to go up this morning, but better late than never.• Are You Going To Get In The Truck? First our Isiah Thomas quote of the day: "It's always good to win your home opener, and for us here in New York we struggled last year at the start of the season at home,'' Thomas said....
Fabregasted!
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. Let's just say I was due. If Martina Hingis had wandered onto my London flight naked and slathered in Toblerone, rocking a gram of cocaine and offering to induct me into her Mile High Club, I still would have been due. It wasn't even the hour...
Al Arbour Promptly Removes Penguins From His Lawn
• This Was Actually How The Redskins Wanted To Bring Joe Gibbs Back, But He Thought It Was Permanent, And Nobody Had The Heart To Tell Him Otherwise — This story about Al Arbour coaching the Islanders again after 13 years to round out his coaching career at an even 1,500 seems pretty cool, doubly so...
Bulls Distracted By Trade Rumors, Other Team's Basketball Ability
• YiHarmony — Well, it certainly doesn't look like Yi Jianlian figured out how not to foul people during games. The waist-high kick is frowned upon, I'd imagine, no matter how high the wall is around your country. But he was only whistled for three fouls in 33 minutes, which enabled him to score a r...
Yes, That's Right, It's An NHL Closer
• Caliendo Can't Impersonate Him. Learn well, kids. When you have a choice between shooting at the goal and not shooting at the goal ... shoot at the goal. This was where I failed miserably in youth sports. But John Madden knew better, and decided against clearing the puck on a power play. His lack-...
ESPN Announcers Have Different Netflix Queues
You Can Stuff Your Sorries In A Sack. Gilbert Arenas guaranteed victory, but the Celtics instead opened up a 37-point second quarter and won 103-83. Now I demand my money back. No, I didn't put up any money on this game, but I was talking about that Thai food that made me sick a few weeks ago. I wan...
Good Night, Sweet Prince
• What's Gotten Into Tayshaun Prince? There's only one way to explain the Piston's opener on Thursday: Tayshaun Prince was bitten by something in the woods, and became Teen Wolf. Prince scored a career-high 34 points, and collected 12 rebounds (!), as Detroit beat Miami 91-80 in the season opener fo...
Cleveland Does Not Rock
• Curse Of The Yankees Lid. LeBron James supposed it was good, harmless fun to sport a Yankees' cap during the American League playoffs, but now that bad karma is coming back to bite him on the ass. If, you know, karma has teeth. James suffered through the only non-scoring first half of his NBA care...
Please Give A Warm Forum Welcome To Day One Of The NBA Season
Welcome the return of your daily recap of NBA "action."...
Others Must Fail
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. I can't remember whether it was Gore Vidal or Big Daddy Drew who first uttered the line, "it's not enough to succeed, others must fail." I can't even remember who he was referring to, but I like to imagine it was my Spurs friend Relegation Zo...
Mopping Up Chelsea's Mess
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....
You Scousers Are Fooling Yourselves
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....
Rocky Mountain High (In Colorado)
As Tuco said when he got the drop on Clint Eastwood in The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, "There are two kinds of spurs, my friend. Those that come in by the door [crosses himself], and those that come in by the window." The Rockies came in the latter way, beating the Diamondbacks 4-3 on Sunday to forc...
If There Is An Allah, He'll Permit A Four-Way Tie
Whenever I see a baseball fight late in the season, I picture Colin Mochrie in front of a green screen trying to figure out what's going on, saying "Well, it all started over a bowl of soup! And now ... look at it!"...
Congratulations, Chicago Prepubescent Bears
What happens when Lou Piniella has nothing else to yell about? Does he grumble that the champagne isn't Korbel? If it is Korbel, does he kvetch that it's not another brand name bubbly? Does he still find some way to throw his hat and choke a child? We may never know the answer, because we're too laz...
Taste The Rockies, Losers! Taste Them!
The Colorado Rockies need a theme song! After beating the Dodgers on Thursday for their 11th straight win — the longest winning streak in the majors this season — they are on the verge of making the playoffs for only the second time in their history. The Rockies are one game out in the wild-card rac...
Free Hope Solo!
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....
Hug It Out, Yankees; You're In The Playoffs
OK, who looked more lifelike: Castro in his latest speech; bin Laden in his last taped address; or George Steinbrenner during Wednesday's Yankees game? They dusted off the long-dead owner, propped him up in a luxury box and had him "watch" New York clinch a playoff berth on Wednesday, the Yankees be...
Every Day Is Father's Day For Prince Fielder
If neither the awesome might of the robotic 12-person beer bong nor the motivational power of free rectal exams are enough to help the Brewers catch the Cubs in the NL Central, then perhaps Prince Fielder's red-hot animosity toward his father is. Fielder The Younger hit home runs No. 49 and 50 on Tu...
Love (And The NL Wild Card) Is A Battlefield
This photo is from Sunday, but it tells you all you need to know about the Padres right now. Milton Bradley being helped off the field, his season ended due to injury after a run-in with an umpire. San Diego had already lost center fielder Mike Cameron to an injury, meaning that two-thirds of their...