cock Page 29 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Your New Year’s Day Bowlkakke
Wake up, shitheads! Time for you to get up, swallow 15 Advil, put your pants back on, and stagger home like the dirty, filthy people you are. Here are the bowl games you’ll need to nurse that hangover…...
Old Cockfighting Magazine Quotes
"His cocks seemed invincible and by the end of the third day's battles those favoring other entrants were heard to remark 'the only way to kill them is with an axe.'" [The Pitch]...
Steve Spurrier Inspires Great Art
This one I call, Man Being Aggressively Clawed By Chicken. But it's not that at all. It is of course South Carolina coach and football god Steve Spurrier, who just happens to inspire the artist in all of us. In this portrait he is watched over by the SC Gamecock, just as St. Michael the archangel wa...
College Football Preview: The Jort-Out Is Coming
In a move reminiscent of the final rap contest between Rabbit and Papa Doc, Florida fans have embraced their greatest flaw: the you wear jorts insult that Georgia fans have been hurling for the better part of a decade. Yep, there's an organized movement afoot for Gator fans to show up in jorts for t...
So What's The Deal With That Tacklin' SEC Ref?
The most frequently submitted tip over the last 48 hours or so is the YouTube clip of that lunatic umpire who lowered the boom on South Carolina quarterback Stephen Garcia as he tried to run for a touchdown against LSU. For a good while, I didn't even believe it was real. It had to be one of those f...
Some Good, Old Fashioned Rooting Section Fail
Note to Kentucky fans: For best results, grasp sign gingerly with fingertips, not entire hand. Now your oh-so-clever double entendre has taken on an entirely different meaning. Hope your mom wasn't watching. And speaking of crazy college kids spelling out naughty things with their hands, check out t...
Peyton Manning Kind Of Awkward In A Public Setting
Let's all get together and laugh at a famous person acting like a real human being! To be fair, it's not really Peyton's fault. The only thing more awkward than watching someone rock out at a concert is watching a guy's face while he masturbates to Internet porn — the spastic motions, the furrowed ...
College Football Kickoff Night: North Carolina State vs. South Carolina
Enough of your waiting, young stallion. The Pack of Wolves are visiting the Game of Cocks. To christen the season on TV, ESPN's Chris Fowler, Craig James and Jesse Palmer are behind the mic. Erin Andrews is behind the sidelines with a different mic — one that gets way more pageviews than a regular m...
Gamecock And Blowie, Together At Last
Of course you all know the University of South Carolina Gamecock, pictured at left. But you may not be familiar with Blowie, the mascot of the Columbia Blowfish of the Coastal Plain League (the only costumed mascot who is deadly poisonous if not properly cooked). I'm not sure of the circumstances w...
Josh Hancock, One Year Later
It was a year ago today that Cardinals pitcher Josh Hancock was killed in a drunk driving accident. Since then, sports has learned its lesson, and no longer do alcohol advertisements appear on telecasts of sporting events....
This Should Cause The Mets No PR Problems Whatsoever
Pitchers and catchers haven't even begun packing, but the first sensational storyline of spring training is already here. Pedro Martinez: Cock Fighter! (As first reported by Home Run Derby.) PETA officials are sharpening their talons and animal activists are massing at the Florida border as we speak...
Let Us Rid Ourselves Of The Cockfighting PED Menace
We don't ask much of our cockfighting, but we do ask that it be pure. We expect the two valiant competitors to give it their absolutely best, at the highest level, on an even playing field. We have to be able to trust our sacred sport of cockfighting; there is, after all, history and tradition to wo...
Revenge Of The Duke Hobbits
Jonah Keri writes the college basketball closer (more or less) daily. E-mail your questions, comments or Clarence Ceasar-related memories to [email protected]....
Welcome to Wild Card Weekend
Praise Jesus, Adonai, Allah, Buddha, Vishnu, Yaweh, Zeus, Odin, Bill Brasky, and their father, Tim Tebow. The NFL Playoffs arrive today and my preferred team will be kicking things off in about four hours. Seattle have the honor of hosting the early game and the weather is about what you'd expect. T...
Hmm, Who Would Win A Fight Between Herschel And Spurrier?
There's not much more ironically amusing than Steve Spurrier lecturing someone else on sportsmanship, but he's been going after Georgia recently for their big touchdown-pile-on a few weeks ago. He said he'd have sent in a third-string Gamecock to start a fight, therefore getting a bunch of Bulldogs ...
When We Beer Bong Together, We Are One
In one of those, "Hey, look, opposing fans can all get along" stories, Kansas City and Green Bay fans come together to experience the Doc Ock. The guy wearing the Ahman Green jersey is our favorite....
It's Time for Sunday Night Football in U.S. America (This Time on Sunday!)
After getting through Thursday night's season kick-off with John Madden only drawing one penis on the screen, Eli Manning is hoping he'll pick up the slack for this evening's tilt, as Manning's Giants travel to Texas Stadium to wage battle in a manner most NFC East with the Cowboys....
What Kind Of Sports Bar Societal Dregs Will You Encounter During Week 1?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....