cock Page 29 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Children's Treasury Of Men Getting Blasted In The Face With Champagne
Grown men who play professional baseball like to celebrate momentous victories by furiously shaking bottles of Champagne and spraying other grown men in the face. It's such a rich tradition that we've made a happy little gallery. Enjoy!...

Never One To Seek The Spotlight, Danica Turns Down NASCAR
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The One With The Best Barry Switzer Story EVER
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

The Five-Star Columnist Is Unamused By Your Homophobic Taunts
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....

Our Man In Boy Clothes Is Not Feeling Generous Today
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....

You May Be Taller, But You're Still Beneath Him
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....

Your Weekend Throwgasm Breakdown: Ice Cream Cone Physics, Rain Delays, And Stinky Dongs
The week's ending. You need shit to do. Well, fear not. For I have compiled a list of worthy activities, media and/or ingestible chemicals to help you entertain yourself....

Steve Spurrier Apologizes For Not Genuflecting To The Tebow
SEC coaches and journalists spent maybe six hours of the conference's three-day media tugjob fretting over the vicious bastard who didn't pick Tim Tebow as No. 1 Super QB of the year. All because Steve Spurrier can't read....

Creativity In Full Bloom On The Kentucky Minor League Circuit
The Lexington Legends have a passionate hometown fan base that loves to let opposing players know they're appreciated for all their hard work and effort. Especially on dollar beer night. [Horace Grant Halftime Report/Intentional Foul]...

Skip Bayless Gets A Formal Philadelphia Evisceration
This is probably one instance where the "Media Meltdown" tag has never been more apt: ESPN's Skip Bayless gets destroyed on-air by Philadelphia sports radio host Mike Missanelli. Enjoy the carnage....

Roger Millions Is Hard On Himself
The Blackhawks won. That's all that matters, Roger. Nobody will ever remember you said "cocksucker" on live TV during the pregame. [Total Pro Sports]...

Play Football For Lane Kiffin Or Suffer The Minimum Wage Consequences
Tennessee's spring football practices begin today, but it's really hard to imagine how Lane Kiffin's tenure as head coach could get any more entertaining than it's been so far. (Fingers crossed!)...

I Guess Brian Bocock Calls It Schwing Training
So here's a rather amusing tale from San Francisco Giants beat writer Andrew Baggarly of the San Jose Mercury. Yes, it involves boner pills. Doesn't every Giants' story?...

Your New Year’s Day Bowlkakke
Wake up, shitheads! Time for you to get up, swallow 15 Advil, put your pants back on, and stagger home like the dirty, filthy people you are. Here are the bowl games you’ll need to nurse that hangover…...

Old Cockfighting Magazine Quotes
"His cocks seemed invincible and by the end of the third day's battles those favoring other entrants were heard to remark 'the only way to kill them is with an axe.'" [The Pitch]...

Steve Spurrier Inspires Great Art
This one I call, Man Being Aggressively Clawed By Chicken. But it's not that at all. It is of course South Carolina coach and football god Steve Spurrier, who just happens to inspire the artist in all of us. In this portrait he is watched over by the SC Gamecock, just as St. Michael the archangel wa...

College Football Preview: The Jort-Out Is Coming
In a move reminiscent of the final rap contest between Rabbit and Papa Doc, Florida fans have embraced their greatest flaw: the you wear jorts insult that Georgia fans have been hurling for the better part of a decade. Yep, there's an organized movement afoot for Gator fans to show up in jorts for t...

So What's The Deal With That Tacklin' SEC Ref?
The most frequently submitted tip over the last 48 hours or so is the YouTube clip of that lunatic umpire who lowered the boom on South Carolina quarterback Stephen Garcia as he tried to run for a touchdown against LSU. For a good while, I didn't even believe it was real. It had to be one of those f...

Some Good, Old Fashioned Rooting Section Fail
Note to Kentucky fans: For best results, grasp sign gingerly with fingertips, not entire hand. Now your oh-so-clever double entendre has taken on an entirely different meaning. Hope your mom wasn't watching. And speaking of crazy college kids spelling out naughty things with their hands, check out t...

Peyton Manning Kind Of Awkward In A Public Setting
Let's all get together and laugh at a famous person acting like a real human being! To be fair, it's not really Peyton's fault. The only thing more awkward than watching someone rock out at a concert is watching a guy's face while he masturbates to Internet porn — the spastic motions, the furrowed ...