crime Page 61 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Infidelity Mars, Spices Up Dallas Kickball Game
Your morning roundup for March 5, the day after a "terrible guy" felt like a "wonderful fellow."...

The Messy History Of Charlie Sheen's "Winning" Ring
As part of his relentless media odyssey this week, Charlie Sheen introduced himself to Twitter with a message that had a Chappelle-esque, "Kiss the rings, bitches" quality to it. It was an image of Sheen's shimmering 1927 World Series ring that was once worn by another winner with an equally insatia...

Watch LeBron Throw The Ball Right In Chris Bosh's Face, Blow A 24-Point Lead
Your morning roundup for March 4, the day Northwestern students remain engaged in the idea of human sexuality....

Extremely Intoxicated Priest Offered Himself Up As Sex Slave To Some Cops
When Brimfield Township, Ohio police came up upon the Very Reverend Canon Ignatius J. Kury, Pastor the other night, the holy man was laying down in the back seat of his ride, hammered. This much was confirmed when he blew three times the legal limit. That's around the time that they decided to star...

DUI Suspect Blames Oral Sex For Erratic Driving
A DUI suspect, who police say nearly drove off the road while weaving in and out of traffic, claims his erratic driving was caused by the oral sex he was receiving from his girlfriend. You go, Louisville! [Jalopnik] ...

Pizza Shop Bandit Leaves Hansel-And-Gretel Trail Of Sauce, Chips
And they knew him by the trail of Doritos and pizza sauce. They, being the Ventura County Sheriff's Department. Him, being Taylor Christopher Jackson who allegedly broke into a Domino's pizzeria in Ojai, Cal. But how did they know?...

The Detroit Pistons Went With A Malcontent-Free Six-Man Roster Last Night
Your morning roundup for Feb. 26, the day San Francisco starts looking for messages in the snow....

Pacman Jones Wears A Neck Brace To Court, Has His "Life In Order," Gets A Year Probation
Your morning roundup for Feb. 25, the day you can feel safer because the Army may have used mind-control ops to persuade U.S. Senators to throw more war-bucks and war-flesh their way....

Caltech Basketball Win Raises Record To 1-310 In Last 311 Conference Games
Your morning roundup for Feb. 23, the day Rahm Emanuel starts cursing at the phrase "staggering unfunded pension liabilities."...

Justin Bieber Is More Valuable Than Scottie Pippen On The Basketball Court, Too
Your morning roundup for Feb. 19, the day Wisconsin edges closer to Cairo of the Heartland....

Don Mattingly Will Stop At Nothing To Find A World Series Ring
Your morning roundup for Feb. 16, a day after a guy from Texas retired from riding bicycles while wearing tights. Again....

The NHL Doesn't Seem To Think The Islanders Can Control Their Players
Your morning roundup for Feb. 13, a day in which a Supreme Court justice prepares to celebrate five years of playing mum at work....

Connecticut Man Ordered To Publicly Apologize To Whale Mascot
Kevin O'Connell got drunk and went to the Connecticut Whale minor-league hockey game on Jan. 28. When he got there, he tackled and punched team mascot Pucky the Whale, who was greeting child fans. In court a few days later, he said he did so because of a bet....

The Cleveland Cavaliers Are On A One-Game Winning Streak
Your morning roundup for Feb. 12, the day Mars-commute impregnating became a non-starter in the name of continuing the colony....

Tiger Woods Is Having A Great Time In Dubai
Your morning roundup for Feb. 11, the day the White House has to play whatever cards they have left…...

Zurich Soccer Fans Are Enthralled By Gene Simmons's Tongue
Your morning roundup for Feb. 10, the day we regretted the harm our actions have caused our family, our staff, and our constituents....

Man Arrested For Allegedly Inserting Porn Clip Into 2009 Super Bowl Broadcast
Citing Comcast's "significant economic losses" and the fact that many children were subjected to 37 naughty seconds of pornography during Super Bowl XLIII, federal and state officials announced the arrest of a 38-year-old Marana, Ariz. man last night....

Here's Video Of Last Night's One-Punch NHL Goalie Fight
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Vikings Defensive End Gets Arrested, Released, Tased, Then Arrested Again
Last year, Everson Griffen was a fourth round draft pick out of USC. The rookie defensive end played in 11 games for the Minnesota Vikings this season. But who cares. Check out what he did this weekend....

Police: Chicago Sportscaster Did Head Stand, Danced In Street During Traffic Stop
Chicago sportscaster Mike Adamle got pulled over for allegedly running a flashing red traffic signal in Evanston, Ill. a few weeks back. But was he drunk? He says no, that he had one glass of wine two hours earlier....